Stupidest reason to go to ER

[DachRN]

ER Nurses/MD's etc.

I am currently writing a "paper" on stupidest reason for someone to come to ER.

ANY input you can send me would be much appreciated. IF you'd like a copy of the FINAL draft, let me know.

THANKS in advance!

PS. My winning entry so far is:

A woman who brought 1 month old baby in at 2:30 (AM of course) because "it won't look me in the eye, It doesn't recognize me!"

Not kidding

[longjourneydream]

Now I have to start getting funny.

One of the more experienced ER nurses came into the break room exclaimed, "Just when I thought I've seen everyhing." I said, "what".

She said, "EMS just brought in a man having constipation X1 day."

She said, " He came walking in with the two guys from rescue, with a suite case." I said , "Oh my Goodness gracious."

Then I thought that day in my little pea brain,

We have had many of these rescue constipation calls lately, but not X1 day!!!

I'm sure I'll think of more...

Hey I'd like a copy of that paper when you are done with it.

It would make great break time humor... CW

Anything other than:

hemorrhage

compound fracture

stroke

severe infection

MI or severe chest pain

severe abdominal pain

labor dystocia, pp, other OB emergency

near-death from trauma or other sudden onset

sudden loss of vision or paralysis

sudden incontinence

is stupid. My recent experience in the ER confirmed this to me. Even my severe pain and sudden loss of use of a limb didn't keep me from avoiding the lunacy of going to an ER. Heck, I think maybe we should just do away with ER's altogether and just, when it's our time to go, go. Just kidding - but almost serious.

Here's a stupid reason to call 911 - no ride. Not an emergent condition, just no ride to get to the ER for treatment of HIV-related pain. I had a home care patient who did this once. Granted, he was sicker than usual but I thought we ought to try to find a friend or relative to carry him to the hospital, not call 911 so an ambulance would come. What did I know?

[Dalzac, LPN, LVN, RN]

per ambulance...She wanted to be admitted to regular hospital room,not psych, so she could get a couple of days rest. Her kids were driving her crazy. Somehow I don't think it was the kids.

[bidimom]

Just the other day, a mom, toddler and aunt came in after eating at a Pizza Place. They thought they had eaten ants and wondered if we could xray them and see if they were in there and still alive. I would love a copy of the paper when you are finished with it. I could use the laughs.

True Story!

I love my job!!

[grandee3]

Mom (6months pregnant) and grandma brought 2 yr old in because they thought he had chicken pox. When kid not admitted, grandma suddenly had chest pain and did get admitted, to my floor. Mom and kid took over the empty bed in semi private room like they owned the place, asking for milk, juice or cookies for kid.

We found out that they were actually hiding out because the kid's other grandma was trying to take child from this girl. Go figure, mom and grandma left kid sleeping in bed to go downstairs and smoke. Yes, the preg girl was still smoking. That made me very mad. Maybe the other grandma should get the kids.

Wonder how much of that bill will come out the taxpayers pocketbook.

[CritterLover, BSN, RN]

to me, there are two different categories of "stupid" complaints. the first are for things that might not even need treated at all, let alone qualify as an emergency. the second, certainly qualify as an emergency, but the thougt process that led to them is just stupid.

for the first category:

yeast infections

bug bites (local reactions only, no cellulitis)

lice

"i want my d*** checked," declined to be more specific

"i ate bad cheetoes," no other complaint (as in, no nausea, vomiting, abd pain)

any number of people that fall or otherwise "hurt" themselves in a public place that have no apparent injury (and end up with no documented injury). i tend to suspect they are fishing for a lawsuit, and just completely clutter up the er waiting room many evenings.

any pain/problem/issue that has been going on for weeks....months...years...that hasn't gotten worse, but the patient just suddenly felt that it needed to be "checked out."

second category

took a bottle of tylenol because my boyfriend hung up on me.

got drunk, played with a gun, and shot myself (relativly common, but still stupid)

soaked my diabetic foot in full-strength bleach (trying to get rid of the odor from the ulcers.....and created a whole new odor!!)

tried to circumcize myself

and of course, the all-too-common objects stuck in places they weren't intended to be placed in the first place......

[AliRae]

Diagnosis in the computer in our peds ER:

"ran away from home for 3 days - mom wants to know if still a virgin"

[danissa, LPN, LVN]

Anything other than:

hemorrhage

compound fracture

stroke

severe infection

MI or severe chest pain

severe abdominal pain

labor dystocia, pp, other OB emergency

near-death from trauma or other sudden onset

sudden loss of vision or paralysis

sudden incontinence

is stupid. My recent experience in the ER confirmed this to me.

Also add to the list of WHY to go to the er...just be the mother of a SON!!:lol2:

Long list of er visits include taking off your cycle helmet, and using your head and entire back as your braking system...on a gravel path:uhoh3: Falling from a tree, and limping home, with your Brand new trousers torn at the knee..get in deep dodo from your mammy, until she notices that actually the skin on your knee is hanging in a flap, not just a cut, but the whole skin in a Flap!:trout: (one almighty scar to show off when wearing a kilt!!)

Oh and open and ingest your great grannys thyroid meds, (contact with the poisons unit!), drink turpentine..further contact with the poisons unit)...my list goes on much further..these are a small section of why I have had to visit the er with my dear boy! now hes 14, thankfully, these occurences have stopped..hopefully!

[Altra, BSN, RN]

So often I am left waiting for the punch line that never comes.

Ain't it the truth ...

Two female patients, presumably "BFF," stopped by at about 2100 on a Friday night. Both of them dressed to get their groove on. One managed a semi-serious story involving possible UTI symptoms. The other one simply stated, "I just need a pregnancy test."

Both pg tests negative. They continued on with their evening plans. :stone

[Medic/Nurse, BSN, RN]

i hope i win!

"my foot looks funny!" via rescue.

55 year old man with a 30 (thirty) year history of this "problem" with his foot.

denies pain.

no swelling, redness, skin is intact without history of injury.

cms is intact.

guess what? then why?

what? - that's right! a bunion!!! (and a thirty year old one at that!)

why? - "well, you guys have a 30 minute guarantee and i didn't have anything else to do!"

no, i'm not kidding. i don't even have a sense of humor about such things. and he didn't have insurance - i only rarely look - but i did on this patient.

discharged to home. no xray. no meds. attempted patient education - but, i gave up. no point.

[sconoli]

These are hilarious; I am a nursing student thinking of working in the ER someday. I definitely want a copy of this, I'd love to share it w/ my nursing class. We need a good laugh!!

[CCL"Babe", BSN, RN]

broken fingernail- via EMS

ate cereal with worms in it. thought that they were eating through her stomach

[PeachyERNurse, BSN, RN]

I don't work in an ER, but when I was doing my ER rotation in school, we had this lady come in just for a tetorifice shot (no she didn't step on a nail or anything, she just needed a tetorifice shot). I'm thinking to myself WTH:uhoh3:! And then, the entire time she's in the ER she's complaining that she's going out of the country later on that day and she needs to go home and pack so COULD WE PLEASE HURRY UP!!!:trout: