Stressed new nurse

cpnegrad07 · Sep 26, 2008

It's good that you know others are going thru this (or have). Yes, this board is full of stories--maybe some can help you if you read thru them.

My suggestion is to have a notebook with you to write down stuff that you may need later. Use your days off to research questions that you have (write them in the notebook as they come up). Ask your co-workers any questions that you have. Insist on an orientation, an extended orientation, a supplemental orientation---whatever it takes to help you. Lastly, slow down a millimeter, breathe one breath for yourself, and know that it will get done--maybe not on your shift, but eventually. They can't expect you to know all this all at once.

Our 'system' sucks. :smokin:

IamRN08 · Sep 26, 2008

Thank you so much for your kinds words and tips. I knew posting my thoughts on the boards would get some feedback that would help me out. Thank you again....

Cfitz · Sep 26, 2008

I know you said "not as new as me" but I wanted to let you know that I am squarely in the same boat that you are right now. I started on our birthing center full-time in early August. I was hired for nights but have been orienting on days until last week. It started out really stressful and difficult, but I started getting it. Then I switched to nights and it all went to hell. I'm not sleeping, I'm physically ill, the anxiety I feel now is nothing I have ever experienced in my life. I can't rest, I can't stop thinking about how horrible this is. L&D nursing has been a dream of mine for about 17 years. I raised my children while taking pre-reqs and finished nursing school this past May. I was hired immediately by our hospital's b.c., so you can imagine that I have been thrilled, feeling like everything fell into place for me. That fact is causing an enormous amount of guilt and uncertainty. Why can't I hack it? Why can't I just deal with it? The answer is, "night shift". Night shift is the difference between this working for me and not working for me. I have started taking ambien just to get a few hours' sleep during the day and I still feel awful. I tend to have a lot of side effects from medications and ambien is no different. In the past couple of days I have come to accept that I am not cut out for night shift work. It makes me literally physically sick. What kind of life is that?

I am going to go in and talk to my nurse manager today (who is not terribly kind) and tell her that if they will switch me to part-time (2 12s a week) I will continue to work, but if they can't or won't do that, I am going to bow out and look for something else. It is just not worth jeopardizing my health and the wellbeing of my family for a job. I can't believe I'm saying this, after wanting to work birthing center for so long, but the truth is I just didn't understand what I was in for trying to work nights. With 2 12s a week, spaced out several days, I can deal with it. I can still have a pretty normal life. I can nap the afternoon of the night I have to go in, and I can sleep some when I get home the next morning, then just go to bed at regular time that night and get a decent night's sleep. But with that third shift thrown in, I can't just do that. The third 12 makes all the difference.

I understand that you have bills to pay but it breaks my heart to think of you killing yourself for that. Are there no other alternatives for you? Med Surg is SO stressful, then add peds to that and UGH - I can totally understand your stress. I very much hope you can come up with an alternative. I have heard that it starts to get better (as long as you're SLEEPING) after a couple of months. If you are able to stick it out for that long, it will probably begin to get easier (again, as long as you're sleeping!). I wish you the best.

RedhairedNurse, BSN, RN · Sep 26, 2008

This too shall pass and you will feel more confident. I was in your shoes and I can tell you It gets better, I promise. Once the preceptor is gone it gets a whole lot better!!

Bwise3487 · Sep 26, 2008

I am a new nurse started May, I work full time 7p-7a on med surg floor. I did not get much orientation before I was turned loose and I was scared to death. I'm sleeping ok but I would get report every work night and then go straight to the bathroom and have diarrhea! Here's the thing you have to realize at some point you will make a mistake, all nurses do, hopefully you won't make a fatal error but each "little" mistake you make will give you what we call experience and experience is only achieved with time. Learn every single day you are there, if you don't know how to do something find someone and ask questions, ask questions ask questions, if someone won't help you find someone that will. Fortunately where I work the nurses all team up together to help who ever is struggling that night. Know that you will have good nights and bad nights and you can't predict when they are! There is so much that nursing school does not teach you, for example I just found out that if you have a dying patient and its near the end if you move them you may hurry the dying process, luckily I was with a nurse who let me know before I turned the pt but I never knew that. Anyway here is a little prayer that I say everytime I am walking into work and I feel it helps me know that I at least ask the higher up for help

Oh God, Give me grace for this day, Not for a lifetime, nor for next week nor for tomorrow, just for this day. Direct my thoughts and bless them, direct my work and bless it, direct my hands and bless them , direct the things I say and give it blessing, direct and bless everything I think, speak and do so that for this day just this one day I have the gift of grace with Your presence. Good Luck (sorry so long)

oncologynurse77 · Oct 1, 2008

Join a gym. It is the best therapy ever. And cheaper. If you can't make yourself go on days you work, go on your days off. It helps me process everything and get all my stress, fear, frustration, anxiety, and feeling of incompetence out of me and onto the treadmill. Everything just melts alway and I have peace. It just feels so good to physically FIGHT with something. Attack that eliptical! I feel so pent up about work, we have to appear so calm and collected at work.

That, and the serenity prayer. I am not really religious but my mom gave me a bracelet for graduation (may 08) with it... god grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things i can, and the wisdom to know the difference. I try to figure out what parts of my job are about courage and which are serenity (I can't change the fact that this person has just been diagnosed with end stage cancer, but I can find the courage to meet them where they are)

:) best of luck to ya

abbynurse28 · Oct 1, 2008

ah, i feel your pain. this is my 2nd career as well and i'm used to being the capable, and "in charge" one and now i feel like i'm always backtracking to make sure i didn't forget anytihng. i am stressed too and have trouble sleeping at night. i would love any advice as well but just wanted you to know you aren't alone in this!

:yawn:

kharing · Oct 1, 2008

That, and the serenity prayer. I am not really religious but my mom gave me a bracelet for graduation (may 08) with it... god grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things i can, and the wisdom to know the difference. I try to figure out what parts of my job are about courage and which are serenity (I can't change the fact that this person has just been diagnosed with end stage cancer, but I can find the courage to meet them where they are)

I am leaving for work in about one hour. After reading this, it will be easier to get through the night. It's been a tough week - lots of stressors. Thank you for putting this in your reply! I love my job, but when things get rough it makes it hard to stay on track.

Kelbel2440 · Oct 2, 2008

Hey there. I am a nurse on an Orthopedic/Neurology Patient care unit. I have been off orientation for about 7 months now. I relate to every word you say as I went through the same thing. I think I spent about 3 weeks in a row running to the breakroom or bathroom to cry just enough to get the lump out of my throat. And every person i talked to said, it gets better. Just give it 6 months, you will see. In that moment though . . . I could'nt see. I questioned my job every day. I thought, is it me, am I not cut out for this job? But I kept with it. And surprise surprise, it got better. I don't know what your staffing is like but that was one big change I had in May. We went from having 6-7 patients, to having 4-5. My boss even said to our coordinators about the switch "I knew the staffing change was successful when I didn't see Kelly crying in the breakroom every day." So maybe that could be something you could look at until you get your feet on the ground and feel confident. My other advice is this . . . when you feel your world spinning and you have a list of 20 tasks to get done in 30 min. just take a deep breath to clear your head, and start at the top of the list. Do one task at a time and try not to start up a bunch of things at once, because the more in-progress tasks you have going, the more stressed you are going to get. Utilize your coworkers to vent, to ask questions, ask for advice, and if you have coworkers that are willing to help you - let them!!! Know what tasks you have that can be easily deligated for the moments that someone does offer to help you out, and don't feel bad giving out tasks. They offered to help! I make a list and cross off each item as I do it - makes me feel like I am accomplishing things and keeps me motivated. And I think someone else also said this - but realize that you will not always get everything done! Do as much as you can while staying sane, and then pass off to the next person what you did not finish. They might not like it but thats the life of nursing. I hope this helps you out some. I know in that moment it is hard to see the light no matter what people tell you. But whatever you do don't quit!!!! Because when you are finally able to come to work and walk out onto the floor with confidence and know you are doing a good job . . . it is an amazing feeling! Good luck to you!

PS - sorry so long - I just know the feeling and it sucks!

mommyX2 · Oct 2, 2008

I am brand new and completely overwhelmed too. I have spent time this week thinking about why I felt so confident at so many other jobs really quickly and why this one is so different. I think the answer lies in the fact that you can feel competant easily when a persons life isn't involved but once you bring that in all bets are off. You can't walk into a job that is so serious and not feel scared, it would probably be bad. From what I have heard from even experienced nurses we will one day be happy when we walk off the floor and know our patients are fine and have had their meds. I can't wait until I reach that day.

TopazLover, BSN, RN · Oct 2, 2008

I am definitely not a new nurse but I remember well those first few months and even the first year + when I did not feel competent to match my colleagues in knowledge, ability, or speed.

One thing I did that helped me a bunch was to write a journal. In it I had to write 3 things I did right that shift. Sometimes it was simple things like teaching post MI. Other times taking time to hold a hand. The hardest thing for me was to keep those negative thoughts out. I made myself not compare my work to others, just give credit to me for what I did.

It really helped me to gain confidence as I looked back and saw that I had grown.

Give yourself some time and pats on the back. Few others will do it for you. That does not mean they think you are not doing well. It just means they are focused on doing their own jobs.

Nursing is hard, and especially in the first years.With experience you get a little more forgiving of yourself for being human and just mutter when you waste a trip down the hall to do one thing when you could be doing two if you had it together more.

Best wishes for a long and happy career. :nurse: