Strange things found on (or in) a pt.

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I've always wondered, especially after hearing about this guy who brought a snake into the ER----what is the strangest thing you've ever found on (or in) a patient?

I had a patient come to the ER after putting a spermicidal suppository in her urinary meatus instead of her lady parts. She was young and thought sex was supposed to hurt. I had to catheterize her and the urine had a waxy film on top it. I've also had a very obese woman come in with a remote to the TV under one of her breasts and a half eaten sandwich under the other.

I once read about a widowed, childless elderly woman who came into the hospital for some fairly routine problem. She had to be catheterized, and whoever did this discovered that her urethra was incredibly stretched out, while her hymen remained intact.

She was asked about her sex life when she was married, and she said, "It was really painful the first year, but after that it was fine."

:eek:

Good thing that girl came into the ER because what if she had continued doing that and ended up pregnant? But I've heard about women who took their BCPs lady partslly and wondered why they didn't work.

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While working for an ob/gyn, the md pulled a contact lens case out of a pt's lady parts. What was she thinking?

That's what you call "looking for love in all the wrong places........."

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$972.00 on an overdose patient who came in due to ETOH and taking his mothers klonipin. He was not even sober when he started asking for his pants and low and behold he had a bunch of money!!!

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Specializes in EMERGENCY.

male-a slim can of gilette shaving gel

female-vibrator(still on)

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$972.00 on an overdose patient who came in due to ETOH and taking his mothers klonipin. He was not even sober when he started asking for his pants and low and behold he had a bunch of money!!!

Did they take it as a down payment on his bill?

(pigs fly smilie - yes, I have seen those)

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I haven't worked in the ER; I'm just a student. But whenever I want some good nursing stories, I come over to the Emergency Nursing Specialty forum. I saw this on Untold Stories of the ER.

A homeless, mentally ill woman came in to the ER complaining of having worms, and would hold up her arms to the doctor. She was very dirty and had some sores on her arms. So he started cleaning her sores and found that they went quite deep. As he is cleaning further, he feels something move! It was an earthworm! He pulls the earthworm out of the homeless woman's arm and she gets very upset and starts screaming out a man's name (which I forget). Turns out she had made pouches in her arms and put that worm and many others in there, and she also had named all of them. She was very worried about the welfare of the worms, so a nurse went outside, got some dirt, and put each worm in its own separate urine cup, with its name written on top. There must have been at least 15 worms recovered from her arm pouches.

I saw this one too! I'm watching Untold Stories of the ER right now!!

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Specializes in Emergency, outpatient.

Gotta add my two stories....

1. Man walks in from triage with blanket wrapped around waist. Accompanied by wife. Toilet brush stuck in rectum--the kind that has a handle with a hook, not a loop. Perforated the wall of the colon and hook would not allow him to remove it. It was pitiful. He was pitiful. I will never buy a toilet brush with a hook on the end, in honor of his "sacrifice.":coollook:

2. Basic EMT many years ago, one of my first calls...went to get the local "fat lady" for her usual trip to the ED; I had never seen her before. Under her butt folds we picked out dog turds and porkchop bones. Yuck.

PS Today the ED crew was discussing the mango in the butt. (Guess that one must have been hanging upside down in the tree when it fell in there.....):D

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Specializes in NICU, Peds, ICU/CCU, Cathlb,ER, Flight.

In triage a lovely elderly man & his wife. The man states, "I have a woodpecker stuck in my rectum." To which I replied, "Isn't that a bird?" No, it was a wooden carved woodpecker "that has been in my family for 2 generations." :eek:The little old wife sat & told me about their lovely grandchildren & how great retirement life is. When I took the gent to the back, out of his room could be heard the phrase, from the Ed doc, the surgeon, the radiology tech, "Isn't that a bird?"

Still cracks me up to think of that day.

ps: He went to surgery, woodpecker was recovered, er, to be passed onto another generation???:eek:

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In triage a lovely elderly man & his wife. The man states, "I have a woodpecker stuck in my rectum." To which I replied, "Isn't that a bird?" No, it was a wooden carved woodpecker "that has been in my family for 2 generations." :eek:The little old wife sat & told me about their lovely grandchildren & how great retirement life is. When I took the gent to the back, out of his room could be heard the phrase, from the Ed doc, the surgeon, the radiology tech, "Isn't that a bird?"

Still cracks me up to think of that day.

ps: He went to surgery, woodpecker was recovered, er, to be passed onto another generation???:eek:

Did the husband have Alzheimer's or some other kind of dementia?

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Specializes in ED staff.

OK if we're gonna talk things found "inside" patients.... I was working intriage, little old man signs in. I get him into tthe office and ask why he's there, he says"I've got diarrhea", then syas"I just lied to you" I thought OH great, what has he done!?! He takes out a pouch made of a silky fabric, pulls out a paper weight that stood about 8 inches in height, oval in shape and about the same size around. He tells me that the twin to this one is in his rectum. I just don't get it.

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Specializes in Labor and Delivery.

A vibrator that was still vibrating in the rectum of a man!!! His wife brought him in but wasn't the person with him when it was placed there. You could hear it buzzing all the way to the nurses station!!! :lol2:

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Specializes in ER.

A bingo dobber---rectal. Delivered in the ER

Flashlight-----rectal. Had to go to surgery.

Pencil and pen-----rectal. Had to go to surgery.

AA battery in the airway of an 18 month old. Child prestnted with stridor. Father brought child in from the moms. Transfered to Childrens.

A butterknife that had been swallowed and was in the stomach. This guy was into pain meds and did it to get meds. Surgery. After he recovered I believe he spent some time in the state mental hospital.

When will people learn that the rectum is an exitand NOT for f/b's!!??

:nono:

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