So done...

Published

I have been nursing for about 12 years as an LPN in homecare, and to be honest, I have hated it most of that time. The only things that have kept me from walking away a hundred times are the (mostly) wonderful people who are my patients and the need for a steady paycheck.

Two years ago I took a four month medical leave due to depression and anxiety. It made things crystal clear to me - that I needed to get out of this job but needed to be realistic and practical about it. I dropped to part time in order to cope with the stress, and amped up my side business in foot care that I have had for almost nine years (There is another story there, lol). This has been effective until recently.

In twelve years I have seen many managers, CEO's etc. come and go and have watched each of them tear down existing, working policies/programs in order to make their mark. The most recent plan has seen the hiring of 5 new managers and the disposing of 14 lower level employees. We had a nurses meeting this week to tell us of all the additional responsibilities we will have to take on as a result. There is NO time in our day for any added work. We already get attitude when we insist on a lunch break (nurses shouldn't expect breaks you know). Many nurses, some there for over 20 years, flat-out told management they would be leaving. They were met with blank stares and silence.

I try to support my fellow nurses when I can but we have many new nurses, both new grads and experienced, and I am getting very tired of cleaning up "messes", finishing others' paperwork, placing urgent supply orders because others neglected to do it, calming irate case managers over situations not of my making, etc. I have had clients tell me that other nurses have told them they "don't order supplies, etc", which IS all of our jobs. I am sick of getting no support from management. The list of my complaints go on and on :(

My anxiety and panic attacks are slowly returning and I refuse to fall back into a depression over this job.

Today I decided to call a local service agency that showed interest in having me do foot care for them on contract, and will quit dabbling in my business and make a go of it. A month from now I plan to be GONE from this agency, and the thought is so gratifying!

Sad that we nurses so often put ourselves last, when life is so darn short!

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Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.

I couldn't agree more! Get out while you still have your sanity---no job is worth this kind of cost in terms of anxiety and depression. I didn't get out in time when the stress of my onetime DON position triggered a bipolar crisis that ended with me losing my job, as well as most of my confidence in my ability to nurse.

RUN, do not walk away from this agency. And good luck to you!

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Thanks for your support, and I am sorry that you experienced what you did. It is a shame that so many employers take advantage of the already giving nature of their nurses and drive them to the brink :(

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Specializes in neuro/ortho med surge 4.

You must feel a huge sense of relief. Good for you and yes- life is too short. I am changing jobs to be an office nurse on Sep 3. I am so relieved to get away from the hospital med surge stress I have cried tears of happiness. I have learned managers don't care about you unless you can do something for them. I worked every weekend for a year and many other weekends that were not my weekend to work as well as overnights. All of these times that I have went out of my way to accommodate my unit and my manager was rude to me about not being able to work another overnight before my 3 week notice was up. She basically said something in a nasty tone of voice and hung up on me.

Take care of yourself because no one else will. Best of luck and congratulations on changing your life!

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Thanks for your support, and I am sorry that you experienced what you did. It is a shame that so many employers take advantage of the already giving nature of their nurses and drive them to the brink :(

Amen. It's even worse when the managers ARE nurses.

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Specializes in neuro/ortho med surge 4.

That is why I would never go into management. As a nurse you know the demands placed are ridiculous.

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Specializes in Public Health, L&D, NICU.

My last job was literally killing me. I was so stressed out by it that I would sometimes vomit on the way to work from nerves. I felt like I had put my blood, sweat, and tears into that job and my patients, and when I told that awful, awful excuse for a human that sat in authority over us that I was leaving, I got "Ok." No "we'll miss you," no "we're sorry to see you go," and certainly no "Is there anything we can do to get you to stay?" Your foot care business sounds rewarding, and there is great satisfaction in simply having some control over your work life. Don't let your job ruin your life. The days when a company cared about its workers is over. Nurses are numbers to managers, not people with lives and hearts. One of my best nursing friends had been out of work for a bit to be with her mother who was dying in ICU. It just happened to fall into the same 12 month period that she had taken maternity leave. The day she made her mother DNR, our manager (truly, I despise this woman) called her and told her to be back before the end of the week or she would lose her day shift slot and possibly her job. Forget the years of dedicated service to the hospital, forget her accomplishments and achievements, forget that her life was crumbling at the moment. I'm thoroughly convinced that if one of us had dropped dead at the nurses station, our manager's main thought would have been who would clean up the mess. Do what makes you happy. Only you are going to take care of you!

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We had one CEO who would leave semi-threatening group messages to the nursing staff. The union rep would call her up and within an hour of the first message she would leave another, telling us all how we misunderstood the first one and grudgingly recanting, coming just short of an apology. You could actually time the whole process. Would have been funny if we all weren't working under the monster.

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Love your user name! Aren't there other home care agencies you could use as a backup/additional income?

In a perfect world, so many staff nurses walked that this agency saw the light/

Good luck with the foot care.

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Nursing has to be one of the toughest fields out there. I want to move out of this field and open a restaurant. This field is cut throat. so much demand on one person to do everything.

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Specializes in LTC,Hospice/palliative care,acute care.

In twelve years I have seen many managers, CEO's etc. come and go and have watched each of them tear down existing, working policies/programs in order to make their mark. The most recent plan has seen the hiring of 5 new managers and the disposing of 14 lower level employees. We had a nurses meeting this week to tell us of all the additional responsibilities we will have to take on as a result./QUOTE] This is exactly what has happened at the LTC and consequently we just had the worst DOH survey we have EVER had. The unit manager's duties include everything from payroll on down to putting out fires on the units with crazy visitors. The staff developement dept (lots of nurses with the entire alphabet on their name tags but little practical experience) just does not have a clue when it comes to orienting new hires and the admin is putting out new policies faster then poop through a gooses and they are so proud of them but communication is so bad that no-one knows anything about them...We can get 5 contradictory emails in 45 mins regarding a new policy-I have never seen anything like it....

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I may not be a nurse or have depression...however life always has its challenges. Move on and remember why you are doing what you truly came here to do!

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