We all have lots of stories to tell. I thought it would be fun if we shared a few of our funniest patient stories with each other.
Here's mine...
I keep remembering a particular incident a few years back. It wasn't even my patient.
I was heading down the hallway on the CCU unit in which I worked. I was minding my own business, heading down the hallway and I just happened to glance into a patient room...
I couldn't believe what I saw...
An older gentleman, who clearly was having some post-op dementia after open heart surgery....
he was sitting up in the middle of his bed and with knees bent and feet braced at the bed rail for extra support....
With both hands...
HE WAS PULLING on all of his CHEST TUBES with ALL OF HIS MIGHT!!!
Needless to say, I sprang into action along with all the surrounding nursing staff. It took security along with all of us to restrain this man so he wouldn't hurt himself. Though it wasn't funny at the time....I can't get this picture out of my mind and find it amusing to remember.
As a male nurse doing my OB rotation in school (currently) I had one experience that was embarassing and funny. I was taking care of a young woman who was in the early stages of labor and I was going over the questionarrie that was given to me by my instructor. When I asked her how she would like to deliver (position) she replied, "you know the normal way, missionary". I wanted to laugh out loud but it was my own fault for not giving her choices, sometimes I take for granted that the patients level of understanding (terminology).
I used to work on an alzheimers unit, Do I have stories! One night the police arrived and said an old lady called (911) and said there were a bunch of people in her hourse having a party and they wouldn't go home!!
There was this one time when we were exposed in the ER. A patient came in who had a complaint of nausea and vomiting. She kept on vomiting and could barely stand so we placed her on a strecher. Her friend who was with her told us "I never thought eggs could cause high blood! Her blood pressure was 180/100!!" @_@ We students so wanted to laugh xD
Oh, yeah!! There were some days working on our orthopoedic ward when I spent more time in my confused patien't reality than I did in my own! I swear dementia's contagious, and it happens when you have 6 patients, all with NOF's, and they're ALL confused, and you have to be very inventive with explanations of why they really shouldn't walk on their broken hip!
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
It was 90+ degrees outside, so one nurse paged overhead that all windows and doors in resident's rooms should be closed, thus allowing the AC to run unimpeded.
A pt with alcoholic encephalopathy, who is quiiiite delusional, called 911 from his room and informed the police that the staff were going to gas everybody to death.
Police arrive (we had no idea he'd called), charge nurse is trying to sort things out, so they go into the man's room - where everything on the bedside table gets thrown at them for their trouble.
1/2 hour later, 2nd shift nurse comes out talking about how he'd told her to put a wet cloth over her mouth and nose or she'd die. The last I heard of this was an order for IM Ativan... :bowingpur
That's sweet! I've worked in nursing homes most of my nursing career.A lot of the residents are so sweet. I wish all of them were. I feel so bad for the ones that don't want to be there & have no place else to go.
I work on an orthopedic/neurology unit and it was my first night shift. I was working a double shift that evening so the rest of the 2nd shifters had left and it was just myself and 2 other nurses and 1 aide. Well, we had 2 pts with dementia.They were on opposite sides of the hall from each other. The man had had a wife named " Jill " who had passed 5 years before, on the other side of the hall was a female dementia pt named " Jill". You can see where this is going:) Any way, " George " began yelling for his wife " Jill" very loudly. Guess who started answering? Yep, the pt across the hall, "Jill". The funny part was the next morning when "Jill's" family arrived, it seems her late husbands name happened to be " George ".:chuckle:bugeyes:
One day when I was working on a cardio-thoracic surgical ward, I was trying to quickly check vital signs on all my patients before the surgeons and their teams did their rounds. As I had looked after one of my patients previously, I was aware that he was a very deep sleeper, and often slept with his eyes half open. I decided to check on all the other patients first and come back to him as it often took him a while to wake up.
I came back into the 'deep-sleeper's' room just in time to see the Registrar beside the patient's bed, looking very worried, obviously thinking that the man had become unresponsive. He was gripping the man's shoulders, shaking him and loudly saying, 'Are you alright? Wake up! Are you alright? Can you hear me?'
The man woke up with a huge fright, jerked upright, pushing the Registrar away, and shouted, 'Who are you? What are you doing here?'. The Registrar also got a fright, and jumped back...
I couldn't help laughing. Eventually they both saw the funny side- once their heart rates had returned to normal! :wink2:
I once had a resident walk up to the nurses station and declare " You know, that Bill is just like a brother to me." When I informed her that Bill was her son, she repled "He is? Well, no wonder I liked him so well!"
So I worked on a crazy "dump floor" as we affectionately called it... we got stuck w/a lot of the NH pts, total cares, psych pts, etc...
A typical shift for me, I had a DT'er... He was in about his 50s and was a humorous country boy... as is typical w/our alcoholic friends, it came time that he required 4 point restraints...
As I was tying him down, true to his wit he said "You act like you've wanted to do this your whole life...tie you down a cowboy"
Our hospital used to let our nicotine-loving patients go downstairs to take smoke breaks. Now they sign a form upon admission explaining that to do so, you will have to sign yourself out AMA.
Well now I was faced with a tall, large, schizophrenic, homeless, blind patient with no fingers...only thumbs (he said he lost them due to frostbite). Well he was agitated and beligerant as all get-out and by golly he wanted a cigarette! (We wanted him to have one too, trust me!) But rules were rules and we explained that he'd have to go AMA to leave and that I didn't advise it, he would probably be discharged in the next couple days, it wasn't worth it. Well he threw every name in the book at us, said we were keeping him there and that we had ****** all over his sheets to make him mad, he said the whole place smelled like ****, that we were holding him hostage, he knows his rights, etc. and proceeded to spit at us, pull out his IV, told us to get the hell away, etc..
He was clearly having paranoid ideation. However, he was oriented x 3 so was technically (according to my nursing supervisor) allowed to make decisions for himself and signed the AMA form.
Alright. Fine. One less patient.
After all that name calling and spitting at us, telling us to leave him alone, could you believe he'd have the nerve to come up to me and ask me to help him undo a knot in the drawstring of his sweatpants!!
With a deep sigh, rolling of the eyes, and mustering up some compassion as I looked at his fingerless hands, I did.
He then walked out of his room and started wandering down the hall...the wrong way.
I did mention he was blind right?? Well, legally blind. He could make out very rough shapes/shadows.
He cursed and spit his way down the hall... got to the elevators. I don't know how but somehow found the "down" arrow. Theres 4 elevator doors.
*ding* one of them opened
He couldn't see which one though!
Okay this is just cruel... I know.
He hit the arrow again... this time the "up" one (oops)
Lucky for him the door in front of him opened. I felt sorry for the people he got on board with...haha
Rumor had it that the supervisor found him somewhere in the hospital, and ended up giving him a cab voucher.
Don't know where they took him... but watching the blind schizophrenic with only thumbs leave AMA was very humorous
On the subject of cigarettes....
For my confused patients, I found that giving them a thermometer probe cover to puff on worked for longer than you'd think.
This happened yesterday..I have the sweetest little Irish lady on my wing. She is what we call "pleasantly confused". She is bilateral BKA and will not wear her prosthesis. So yesterday the NA's get her ready to go out with her daughters for Mothers day. She is wearing a very nice pink outfit with a flower on the lapel. So on the nurses station counter there are Foley bag covers, pretty pink and white ones. I wasnt really paying attention, I turn around and she has 2 of them, one on each leg. I said to her "Peg, why are these on here?" She says "Ah, Jaysus, they match the flower!" I roared laughing for the rest of the day...
allaboutthefamily
22 Posts
As a male nurse doing my OB rotation in school (currently) I had one experience that was embarassing and funny. I was taking care of a young woman who was in the early stages of labor and I was going over the questionarrie that was given to me by my instructor. When I asked her how she would like to deliver (position) she replied, "you know the normal way, missionary". I wanted to laugh out loud but it was my own fault for not giving her choices, sometimes I take for granted that the patients level of understanding (terminology).