is this shady or not?

Yeah that sounds pretty nasty; he told you one thing but didn't apparently mean it. Probably not illegal in most states, though. Be happy you found out how icky this company is before you actually worked for them and give the DON of the other company a follow-up call; she most likely just got busy and hasn't had time to get back with you yet.

Even if you had a written offer ( from what I have read on other threads eg. nurses selling houses to relocate , only to have the offer withdrawn after the sale oreven in some cases after they have moved ) it's not worth the paper its written on , it appears nowadays , that you only are sure you have the job is when you are actually working in a place , even then you only have it as long as your needed . There seems to be little or no loyalty / honesty shown by employers .

I am not surprised that the one HR person told you that, although it was not very nice to lead you to believe that two or three days to think it over was ok. The fact that you took the 2 or 3 days was used against you. Does not sound like a friendly place. If you end up working there you should probably be very careful. Good luck.

I agree with you, but HR justified their actions by saying that they had to cover thier own tails in case I didnt accept their offer. He should have just postponed his interviews until they heard back from me, or at least warned me what might happen....gee wiz, I thought I was doing the right thing , being professional and honest by saying I need a day or two. Maybe i should have said yes and then left them if the other job offer came thru, but i just didnt think that was the right thing to do and now i'm being punished for it.....

I agree with you, but HR justified their actions by saying that they had to cover thier own tails in case I didnt accept their offer. He should have just postponed his interviews until they heard back from me, or at least warned me what might happen....gee wiz, I thought I was doing the right thing , being professional and honest by saying I need a day or two. Maybe i should have said yes and then left them if the other job offer came thru, but i just didnt think that was the right thing to do and now i'm being punished for it.....

You DID do the right thing. One of the few things that cannot be taken from you, not only in the nursing field but in this life, is your personal integrity. NEVER change that; it's what will make you a great nurse. :)

You did the right thing and have found the price of maintaining your integrity . But it is a far better thing for yourself to maintain a good moral compass in life .

integrity, ha.

that's (integrity) good stuff when dealing with family, friends, etc. however, when dealing with big biz (that's what health care is), you deal with them the same way they deal, no integrity, it's all about profit $$$ for them.

wake up and smell the coffee people! this economy only magnifies the true nature of business.

Sad to say but at this tough economic time, perhaps, that employer believes that this is an "employers' market". If you didn't say "yes" right away, then there was no verbal agreement right? Perhaps he thought that you were having doubts about the position-----and given the many applicants that are applying for it too, he really didn't have the time to wait or to hire someone who wasn't too sure. If he is not new to hiring and recruitment, of course he very well knows that you were looking for other options the fact that you didn't accept the offer right away. Shady? I don't think so. Unfair? Yes, could be. But life goes on and you'll find the right job for you.

integrity, ha.

that's (integrity) good stuff when dealing with family, friends, etc. however, when dealing with big biz (that's what health care is), you deal with them the same way they deal, no integrity, it's all about profit $$$ for them.

wake up and smell the coffee people! this economy only magnifies the true nature of business.

Even in this economy it is possible for one to maintain one's personal ethics while still doing what is best for him/her.

The compnay has a postion to fill and you did not accept the offered postion in the time frame they wanted it done in. Sure they said think about it but they never promised that the postion would still be there if you wanted it after all. You did not accept it at that time. The HR person has an obligation to the company, not to you, to fill that spot. There may very well have been others who wanted that spot and he is aware of them so his duty is to try to fill that spot with an acceptable canidate.

Also imagine if they had opffered that postion to someone else ahead of you and you wanted it and that person said let me think about it for a few days and they did. You would be upset and thinking hey I wanted that spot and I would have accepted rigth away. thats not fair to someone who really wants it.

doesn't even qualify as shady

just plain sleazy

don't stop looking for something better where you will be treated with dignity and respect