what do i say?

RNRutRO · Nov 3, 2008

I noticed that you have almost 60 views and no comment, so I thought I would give you my two cents.

I'm sure that your new supervisor knows the situation. They usually do. So, I would probably shoot staight with her/him. They probably want you to be a success and will do anything to help.

IF for some reason you think that they don't know, I would probably go with the telling them anyway. Secrets only seem to get you into more troubles. A lesson I have learned during my process. IF you still feel you just don't want to say something, then just say you have a meeting that meets on this night and would it be alright if you came in early.

Good luck with whatver you chose to do. My new approach (just started today) is NO MORE DRAMA! So if it's going to cause a big deal, then I will do whatever I can to change it.

Again, just my :twocents:

SassyErRn · Nov 3, 2008

thanks for your reply RNRutRO. I have been checking for replies and seeing none so thank you!

I do know for a fact that my new boss does not know about my recovery because the HR woman told me that because it's administration and not bedside nursing that she doesn't need to know. HR stressed that this is to protect my confidentiality and I was glad to hear that. That is also why my worksite monitor will be the woman from hr and not my admin. supervisor.

I will probably just mention that I have a weekly meeting like you said and would like to work 8-4 instead. I am thinking that this position, once I get trained with the computer part, will be more of an independent thing so I am sure they won't care what my hours are, as long as I get the work done.

I have always been the type to plan ahead what I want to say and I would always come up with something to complex when all I really need to do it state something simply. I guess I always feel that things need to be followed with a more detailed reason (like calling in sick, I never just said I was sick, I felt like I had to say what I was sick with and how I felt).

Anyways, I did think I was going to have to tell my new boss my situation because due to a big mess with hprp and finding out that my case manager no longer works there, I can't actually start tomorrow morning like planned because things were not approved yet. I was so ******. I talked to my HR lady because I needed the phone number of my new boss so I could call her and tell her I couldn't start monday (this was friday at the end of the work day...eh). the hr lady told me to just tell her that something came up and i cant start on mon as planned. Only prob now is that I really don't know when I can start because I dont know how long hprp will take to approve my request to start this job. I will fax them the info and signatures they need on wed but I don't know if i should tell my new boss that i should be able to start next mon or just leave it open and get back to her at the end of the week. i don't want to tell her next monday then find out i wasn't approved yet. i am trying to just tell myself to play this week by ear and pray hprp doesn't take more than a day or 2 to accept my request.

ok, sorry for this long post. I really did just want to thank you for your reply and advise =)

life-time-learner · Nov 4, 2008

I have always found that honesty is the best. Just be up front about it. There is a situation in my life that on certian days i am not able to do first shift and third shifts and i was honest about it and my boss does not even ask because she knows i cant, but she also knows that i am at her becken call all other days....good luck

power99 · Nov 4, 2008

Sassy

Whether your super. knows or not. You could just tell her that you have a standing therapy appointment on that day every week. Taking care of you first, no matter what. Right? Smiles....Hang in there.

Magsulfate, BSN, RN · Nov 5, 2008

Sassy
Whether your super. knows or not. You could just tell her that you have a standing therapy appointment on that day every week. Taking care of you first, no matter what. Right? Smiles....Hang in there.

I agree with this... If she doesn't have to know, then don't tell her. As long as you have a supervisor that does know.

SassyErRn · Nov 5, 2008

Thanks for the advice. I think I will just say that I have a weekly meeting. Keep it simple.

Silverdragon102, BSN · Nov 6, 2008

Just want to wish you all the best in the new position :)

lillyoleander · Nov 6, 2008

New to this forum. I am no longer being monitored, that being said from my past experience the less people that know the better. Depending on folk's past experiences with people in recovery whether personal or professional it has a potentially negative impact. You don't know your boss yet. Sit tight and sum the situation up over time. Then YOU decide if you want to reveal your status in recovery.

Just a brief hx about me - I went to tx for etoh at the facility where I worked because of personal problems.(That was where my insurance covered tx) Nothing had branched into the professional realm (yet). All the same, I was treated the same as someone who had been caught diverting narcs. Mandatory referral to EAP, my states "assistance program" etc. I was monitored from 2002 - 2006. (my initial contract was 5 years - finally got a year off for "good behavior) but it cost me dearly in paying for uds etc.

I have a different job now and I am truly anonymous like the name of the group that saved me, AA. Don't let anyone fool you. Anonimity is the spiritual foundation.

Tweety, BSN, RN · Nov 6, 2008

I have a different job now and I am truly anonymous like the name of the group that saved me, AA. Don't let anyone fool you. Anonimity is the spiritual foundation.

Welcome to the forums. I hope you stick around!

I agree with you on this one. My sobriety is not contingent upon people I work with knowing that I'm in recovery. It's an individual decision we each must make for ourselves.

SassyErRn · Nov 6, 2008

Thanks lillly (welcome:)) and tweety for your replies. I am a private person anyways but in the last week I only considered telling my new boss because day after day I was having issues with the state program. I was so frustrated and so ****** for not getting all the info and for them not returning my calls. My fear was having to call my boss yet again and saying that I can't start on the day I had told her. I did it only once but I don't want to do it again. Also since she is an admin person and not a nurse, if she knew my status then she would probally have the common reaction of-oh gosh, I have to keep my eye on her to make sure she is doing her job. That's the normal judgement and even nurses who are not in recovery think that because they don't know what we as addicts know (like you said lilly).

Anyways, I will cont. to keep my recovery private with my new job. I look at it like an office job. If I were to go out and get a job working in an office I wouldn't have to get hprp involved and be monitored. Because I am back at the hospital I want to be monitored so that it can use up my 6 months of narc restriction. I am lucky that the hr lady will me my monitor eventhough she won't even be in my dept!

I needed that reminder that being anonymous is my right and it helps me feel more free instread of binded down knowing everyone knows about my recovery and all eyes are on me. Phew, I can breath!

:nurse:

HM2VikingRN, RN · Nov 6, 2008

I wish you health and safety as you work your way to recovery.