I can only imagine how this is probably going to turn out, but I really have to say something. I ahve been reading on this site for a long time, and although I know I do not have near as many posts placed here, I have noticed an alarming trend on many threads. There aren't too many threads anymore where the subject matter is getting traded in for some petty little arguement between others and people just start "fighting" with each other. Although I know we are just typing here, you can just "feel" the attitudes.
What is up with this? I am not naive, but I really thought we were professionals and this was a place for a "commoradirary" of sorts.
Am I missing something here? I am not trying to start anything here either, it is just with the numerous instances I have seen this, I was wondering how many others feel this way too?
I was also under the impression that this was like "unacceptable" behavior as far as postings went and people weren't allowed to post rude threads.
Let me know what you think, I so invite comments, but please keep it nice.
A hiatus from the internet is sometimes what I have to do. Sort of like, if you can't stand the heat, then get out of the kitchen type of thing. I've done it several times over the years, aliet this one was one of the shorter ones. The longest I've made was about 2 months.
:bow: :bow: :bow:
WOW. I can't tear myself away for more than a day.
I thoroughly believe that if the internet didn't exist, my house would be much cleaner and I'd be about 50 pounds lighter. But I just can't stop!!!
BTW, my husband tried to hide Wikipedia from me. He got addicted to it for a few days and looked up everything he could think of. He knew I'd fall into it's trap, just like I did with the Internet Movie Database. Heaven!
Okay, back to the original topic.
I think that most people are agreeing that with an internet message board, it's pretty normal to have some rudeness and debates here and there. Please don't let that interfere with your image of nursing. We could be a forum of people discussing how to best care for goldfish and we'd be doing the same thing! Just because we debate and get a little testy with each other here and there doesn't mean that all nurses are rude and catty! It just means that we're human.
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
this site is one for professionals, and there are a lot of "wanna-be's" posting to this site.
we would prefer to talk about topics of interest to us, without having to field through the "excuse me, what does bm mean"? posts.
find another group, please.
excuse me, but this is a site for:
nurses
nursing students
those interesting in nursing in general.
nowhere does it say it's a site "just for professionals" and that is because it is not. i will thank everyone to refrain from making others feel at all unwelcome at our site. fortunately, this attitude is not prevalent and i would invite everyone looking for good conversation to browse all our forums. most are very friendly and interesting to participate in. do not be afraid and remember, all are welcome here. it seems the "bad" can easily overshadow the good and it's surely the case here in our forums, at times.
also i will ask, if you see a forum that "turns you off", please just pass it up; no need to make snide or rude remarks or hijack the forum with subject matter that is not germane to the post.
if you feel tempted to "flame" someone, please don't. instead, walk away from the computer before you post and give it some time. also if you need to, tweety's suggestion to take a hiatus from the internet is a good one. remember, real life is important. don't let the 'net get you all up in arms! life is too short.
if someone flames you, please do not respond in kind. instead, report the post to a moderator and let us take care of the problem. remember, flaming others is strictly forbidden per terms of service of the site, so keep that in mind when you feel tempted to "let er rip".
let's work to keep allnurses.com the friendly and informative place to gather. this is why i originally came, and why i stay here.
Often the ones thet motivate me to respond are more controversial.
If there is a factual error or omission, if I have had an experience different from other posters, or is I have links I want to post then it gets posted.
When I disagree I want to explain why.
I've learned so much from some who don't agree with me. Often we will agree completely on another topic.
Then like others I get mad. That's the time to try to refrain from posting. It gets difficult so often I try to explain to people who probably understand.
This is from John Maxwell, a truly inspirational speaker who does a lot of talks on attitude.
Young boy, widowed mom, working very hard on the farm to keep things going, always up before dawn to get the chores done. Mom always woke him up with "It's going to be a WONDERFUL day!" Finally the kid had had enough, and said "No its not! Its going to be a terrible day". Mom said, "well, if thats the way you feel son, you should just go back to bed". Kid thought, wow, this is great. Slept 2 more hours, woke up to the smell of bacon, sunlight in the window; went to the kitchen and greeted his mom, asked for breakfast. She said, "oh no, my son, this is for me. You said this would be a terrible day, so son, I'm going to do my best to let you have ..... a terrible day. Go back to your room. No chores all day! nothing else either. all day. nothing. Got to take a nap, got caught up on all that sleep. Couldn't sleep come dark, all slept out. Mom came in the next morning, kid was waiting for her: "Good morning Mom! It's going to be a WONDERFUL day", out of bed and out the door. And it was.
Choose your attitude, choose to encourage, choose your day.
(BTW, I quoted you on your Kenyan speaker on another thread, thanks!)
Another thing with the internet is that sarcasm is very hard to understand when it's typed instead of spoken. People might take something seriously that was meant to be light hearted or a joke. It's a common problem with the internet.
That's why I love Smilies, they substitute body language and tone of voice for me. Just wish I could figure out a good use for that penguin, he's so cute!
nowhere does it say it's a site "just for professionals" and that is because it is not. i will thank everyone to refrain from making others feel at all unwelcome at our site. fortunately, this attitude is not prevalent and i would invite everyone looking for good conversation to browse all our forums. most are very friendly and interesting to participate in. do not be afraid and remember, all are welcome here. it seems the "bad" can easily overshadow the good and it's surely the case here in our forums, at times.
also i will ask, if you see a forum that "turns you off", please just pass it up; no need to make snide or rude remarks or hijack the forum with subject matter that is not germane to the post.
if you feel tempted to "flame" someone, please don't. instead, walk away from the computer before you post and give it some time. also if you need to, tweety's suggestion to take a hiatus from the internet is a good one. remember, real life is important. don't let the 'net get you all up in arms! life is too short.
if someone flames you, please do not respond in kind. instead, report the post to a moderator and let us take care of the problem. remember, flaming others is strictly forbidden per terms of service of the site, so keep that in mind when you feel tempted to "let er rip".
let's work to keep allnurses.com the friendly and informative place to gather. this is why i originally came, and why i stay here.
thanks, deb.
christy, i'm afraid i have to disagree with you. i don't notice a great deal of rudeness or hostility on these boards, and i really enjoy the lively debates. i will concede there's too much rancor--in the sense that any at all is too much--but i think it's important to distinguish between a strongly argued opinion and a personal attack. it is possible to disagree with someone vehemently and still respect them; in fact, it happens a lot. anyway, i hope you'll continue to feel welcome, here. to me, it's a very useful tool for coping with the mental and emotional demands of nursing. i find that, along with developing my knowledge base and technical skills, part of progressing in the field is finding a "nursing philosophy." i guess i need to understand why i keep showing up for work, and develop strategies for staying happy, and some of these discussions have been a great help to me in that. (now, if i could just get more consistent with starting ivs are dropping an ng, and not have to blow half my shift on them.)
tweety, your thoughtful remarks are a pleasure to read, and i don't mind at all that you sometimes take the time to develop them fully. i think i would feel that way even if i didn't agree with you so often (there are others i agree with less, but still enjoy reading.)
sorry for addressing the posters directly. too lazy and/or tired to think of a less direct way of making my points.
Specializes in ICU, Pediatric, Psychiatric, Med/Surg.
I actually have the same opinion at times, and I step away from the computer, come back when I know I will enjoy reading the banter again.
I have had people try to make me angry, but I just get up and go to the kitchen for a glass of water, come back and change topics for a while. It isnt worth getting upset over. Everyone is good for something-even if it is nothing but a bad example.
I just wanted to thank everyone for their posts on this subject matter! I do appreciate everyone's opinions and thoughts even though I amy not agree with all of them.
Tweety you ahve a wonderful way with words!!!
i do love this site and check it as often as i can. If my service at home was faster, I would probably be on it too much and my kids would wonder what I still look like:lol2:
Thanks again for the discussion, and I think I will leave this thread for anyone else that would still like to discuss it.
As everyone has said, this is the internet and we're all reading text. It's incredibly hard to read true meaning, intention and intonnation of someone's post. We're just interpreting it how we *think* they're trying to say something. Sometimes something is misconstrued with the true meaning and it's taken out of context and then something small snowballs into something completely convoluted.
I'm on a few forums and compared to them, this one is really tame. I almost never read rude posts. There are somes where I think someone is being a little *snide* to a poster who just doesn't understand something, but then I think I may be reading it wrong. It's just so hard when there's a lot of people in one place with different lives, experiences, situations, background, beliefs, values, morals, geography, culture, etc which makes for such a difference in how things are replied to for everyone to get along. Nowhere does Utopia exist, although this one is pretty close! (well as far as message boards).
I'm up for a civil debate as much as the next one. But when it gets personal or people are being intentionally rude instead of trying to be constructive or offer ideas/suggestions then it's uncalled for. That's where moderators can step in and kind of forge a channel for the river to run through, but it helps if the mods don't let their own bias/personal views get in the way.
I love this board. During my last year of nursing school it was my salvation when I needed info or support or a place to rant. I've found the people to be really nice and I've made some great friends along the way. :kiss
then it gets posted.
then to:smiley_ab or
Gompers, BSN, RN
2,691 Posts
WOW. I can't tear myself away for more than a day.
I thoroughly believe that if the internet didn't exist, my house would be much cleaner and I'd be about 50 pounds lighter. But I just can't stop!!!
BTW, my husband tried to hide Wikipedia from me. He got addicted to it for a few days and looked up everything he could think of. He knew I'd fall into it's trap, just like I did with the Internet Movie Database. Heaven!
Okay, back to the original topic.
I think that most people are agreeing that with an internet message board, it's pretty normal to have some rudeness and debates here and there. Please don't let that interfere with your image of nursing. We could be a forum of people discussing how to best care for goldfish and we'd be doing the same thing! Just because we debate and get a little testy with each other here and there doesn't mean that all nurses are rude and catty! It just means that we're human.
And let's be honest here...
We all have a little too much time on our hands.