Thinking of becoming inactive for a while. Am I nuts?

Nurses Retired

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Specializes in BNAT instructor, ICU, Hospice,triage.

My Grandma is having a fit and thinks I am nuts. In the middle of a bad recession and such. She really chewed me out for this, but I want to be a full time mom, and I am so stressed out with the ICU nursing for 11 years, before that I was a med surg nurse in the same hospital for 7 years.

I have been doing per diem for 6 years, and its usually 24 - 40 hours a week at least. I just want to be a mom. My husband really feels the need for me to be home too with my two kids. Do you think I'm nuts?

Specializes in Nephrology, Cardiology, ER, ICU.

Not if this is what you want to do. However, I do think Grandma may be right: I wouldn't let my license lapse or stay completely out of nursing: maybe cut down to 24 hours/week or 16 hours per week.

Specializes in Psych, Med/Surg, LTC.

You are not nuts. I am currently a SAHM. I keep my license active. I took 14 months off after having dd, then worked 8 hours a week until I had ds. I am now home a year, and will go back in ~ 3 months on a very part-time basis. Nursing will be around forever, kids are only young once IMO. :twocents:

I'm not a mom, but I don't blame you for wanting to stay home with your kids, they are only young once. I also think that if that is what you and your husband agree on, then it's nobody else's business. It would probably be a good idea to keep your license active though.

If you want to stay at home with your kids, now is the time. But you should keep your license active and you should be acutely aware of the job situation in your area. Are jobs plentiful? Even if they are, you would probably be better off if you attempt to maintain 16 hours a week to keep your foot in the door. You don't want to give prospective employers any excuse to exclude you from employment consideration.

Specializes in Nephrology, Cardiology, ER, ICU.

And...maybe I'm an old lady who should be ignored, but no job is safe and secure during this recession. I wouldn't want to "count" only on your husband's job with the economic situation being so unstable.

Specializes in BNAT instructor, ICU, Hospice,triage.

Husband's job is as recession proof as you can possibly get. We have never borrowed money our entire marriage, we bought everything with cash so that helps. My Grandma was one of the feminist pioneers (she's 90 years old) I am her POA, and I take care of her too, she can't drive and she broke her hip a year ago, but was able to return home. But she has no clue what it takes nowdays to raise kids. I only have a tiny little window in my life to actively be there mom and be there for them.

I dunno maybe something less stressful would help. In the last 11 years, I've had enough adrenaline to last a life time. I'm burned out, and I desperately want to be a mom and wife. I think that motherhood is a valid career. Its just scarey to quit what I've done for the last 18 years. I LOVE being a mom!!! And DKS are at the age that they still like mom (7 y.o. and 9 y.o.) THeir activities are insane and the homework is crazy, what they expect out of those little tykes. We live in an extremely competative school district we were number one in our state for the state achievement testing. Geesh, My sister and I didn't have homework until 6th grade!

All I can think about while I'm at work is how I'm trashing them and my heart is not in it. My heart is at home with them. :crying2:

Have you considered home health? You can be as flexible as you want in that area. If you only want to work one shift a week or one shift a month, that can be arranged. You can arrange hours so that you are home when the kids get home from school. Just discuss your desired work schedule with the staffing coordinators and they will work with you to provide a schedule that gives you what you need. I knew a nurse who worked seven hour shifts and got home for her kids each afternoon. Other cases are only six hours a day, or even four hours. Think about it as an option.

Specializes in Psych, Med/Surg, LTC.
Have you considered home health? You can be as flexible as you want in that area. If you only want to work one shift a week or one shift a month, that can be arranged. You can arrange hours so that you are home when the kids get home from school. Just discuss your desired work schedule with the staffing coordinators and they will work with you to provide a schedule that gives you what you need. I knew a nurse who worked seven hour shifts and got home for her kids each afternoon. Other cases are only six hours a day, or even four hours. Think about it as an option.

A lot of places are totally flexible if you did not want to be totally inactive. My last place of employment (where I will be returning to soon!) let me work twice a week from 7pm-11pm. It was perfect, it was around my dh's schedule so I did not need daycare and I was not away from my dd for long. Maybe you can find someplace that will let you work 1/2 shifts during your kids school hours. It is just a thought, you don't know what is out there until you look around. A lot of agencies let you pick your hours, and a lot of places hire per-diem. It does not have to be all or nothing. I think it is nice to keep a foot in the door, but if you don't want to, I don't see a problem with taking some time off.

I say do whatever your heart and wallet tells you to do. If you know your dh's job is secure, that is wonderful. Once I return to work, I don't plan on being full-time until the kids are out of the house or something happens to dh. I do want to work some just to keep a foot in the door, though.

Specializes in BNAT instructor, ICU, Hospice,triage.

Its so weird that you mention this! I just got a call 5 minutes ago from a home health agency that I sent my resume to. I had no idea if they were needing nurses or not but I have an interview. Wow! This has to be a God thing!:yeah:

So what do I need to ask in my interview, I know nothing about home health? Will they give me a car to drive or do I drive my own?

Specializes in BNAT instructor, ICU, Hospice,triage.
A lot of places are totally flexible if you did not want to be totally inactive. My last place of employment (where I will be returning to soon!) let me work twice a week from 7pm-11pm. It was perfect, it was around my dh's schedule so I did not need daycare and I was not away from my dd for long. Maybe you can find someplace that will let you work 1/2 shifts during your kids school hours. It is just a thought, you don't know what is out there until you look around. A lot of agencies let you pick your hours, and a lot of places hire per-diem. It does not have to be all or nothing. I think it is nice to keep a foot in the door, but if you don't want to, I don't see a problem with taking some time off.

I say do whatever your heart and wallet tells you to do. If you know your dh's job is secure, that is wonderful. Once I return to work, I don't plan on being full-time until the kids are out of the house or something happens to dh. I do want to work some just to keep a foot in the door, though.

I have kind of been doing this at the hospital I've been at for 18 years. It was Fantastic and Fabulous when dear kids were small. Now that they are older, they need me here at night and the hours are starting to wear on me. A lot of times I don't get home until 1 or 2 a.m. and I'm not a nurse that is a slow poke, I mean, my whole goal from the minute I clock in is to get the heck out of dodge at a decent time or even on time which NEVER happens! I'm so sick of it.

I don't plan on being full time either maybe ever. BUt I realize that I may need to be to put them through college when they are out of the house. I'd like to stay per diem or not work at all though. There's plenty for me to do day in and day out.

I worked per diem when they were small and not in school, mostly evenings and it was wonderful, I also took a lot of ambulance transfers with critical patients that were on drips of intubated when the helicopter couldn't fly. BUt the kids didn't desperately need me quite as bad back then, and it was great the dear hubby and I could alternate our hours so that we didn't hardly need any babysitting. BUt now, I hate working evenings. My sleep is so messed up and one time a sleep doctor said that I may have messed up my body forever, but that's just how nursing is. Its all the adrenaline and back breaking work that's killing me! Stressing me out and I just can't sleep. I can't seem to calm down now!

Specializes in BNAT instructor, ICU, Hospice,triage.

I just got off the phone with the lady that does the hiring at the home health agency. It doesn't sound like anything I'm wanting at the moment. Later on yes. But she said it would be PRN, but would be full time hours. I asked if I could just work one day a week, she said that may be okay, but she would need me to take call for one week every 5 weeks from Friday to Friday, I'd be on call and I'd see scheduled patients all weekend on my weekend to be on call.

I'm thinking, thanks but no thanks, also the rate of pay is $28 per regular visit, and $40 for starting a new patient. Then its .37 a mile.

After the kids are older, but this is too much right now.

How does a person find jobs as a private duty nurse?

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