Retired, now what?

[sueff]

I have worked 29 years as an RN and am now retired due to a medical issue. How do I adapt? I so miss the giving of care, the day to day emergencies, the (yes) charting. Nursing was so much a part of my sole, my being. The first 18 years in peri-natal, the last 11 years in Alzheimer's - dementia and geriatrics. Two years ago I was one of the 25% to survive a ruptured brain aneurysm.

No one would hire me. Retirement was abrupt. I able to admit now that physically and mentally I am no longer able to nurse. It has taken 2 long years for me to recognize this.

The prognosis was not good. Plans were being made to put me in a nursing home. With my stubborn nurses's will I refused. I am now self sufficient physically, not financially. The facilities I worked in had no retirement, no 401k. There is no compensation for all the years I gave my time, my family time, my week ends and holidays. I wound up with mega-bills even after insurance payments. I get by..barely on social security.

My biggest problem is that I so miss caring for people. I miss giving my eight hours of love and concern to my patients. I miss procedures that are so routine to those of you still on the floor. I miss little things like starting IVs, monitoring wounds, seeing a short moment of lucidity in a Alzheimer's - dementia patient. I miss creeping into a elderly patient's room at the end of the shift, just to hold their hand and smooth their forehead. I miss the trusting smile.

I was able to care for two friends in their terminal last days as a nurse. I kept them in their own homes for their last days. That was my goal. I would not have had this opportunity if I were still working. I was also able to use my long embedded nursing skills to save two lives in odd places.

What do I do now..just sit and watch TV. Play on the computer, knit? I know I still have the skills, the love in my heart for nursing, but the physical, mental, endurance is gone. The loss of nursing is almost at devastating as the loss of a loved one.

Those of you just starting out in your profession, know this...You may have bad shifts, become frustrated with "the system" burned out...what ever the term... looking back, it was all worth it.

Just tell me what is there for me to do now????

[UMHedRN]

Although it's not really hands on, telephone triage for insurance companies might be a great fit for you. A lot of these positions allow you to set up shop at home, with incoming patient calls ringing to your phone. Not only convienient, but it would definitely put to great use those awesome triage and assessment skills that you've spent the better part of three decades perfecting! Good luck to you!!!!

[troyd]

Teach those of us that would love to have your knowledge shared with us. One of my most memorable instructors was my CNA instructor. She began nursing school at the age of 45. She practiced as an RN for a number of years. She was disabled and no longer able to do RN work on the floor. But, I gained so much knowledge from her. When I did my first clinical, she was right there with me. I still keep in contact with occasional cards, etc.

She may not be able to be on the floor with the patients anymore. But, she is there in my heart everyday I'm on the floor. :redbeathe

[joies1]

I so much relate and am empathetic to your concerns. I, along with -I'm sure - many others who have similar concerns share with you right now. We loved being a nurse. We loved the hands on care, education and support we could give.

Though I left acute and critical care due to medical concerns in 2000, I did finally get back to an aspect of nursing in 2004 - - assisted living. Finally after 2.5 years in dementia care, in October 2010, I was replaced by a younger nurse who would and could work more hours. (She quit after 3 weeks) I know I managed my job and facility well in my 25 hours a week because 2 weeks after they replaced me, State Survey gave my facility a deficiency free survey. Even the regional manager emailed me stating that he knew this was because I was 'a h___ of a good nurse'.

So what good does that do ? Not a thing, it seems. Who is going to hire you in your later years, with limited, yet functional ability after you have been 'offed' in assisted living ? Nobody !!!! You have already hit the bottom of the nursing pool. You are already working for the least wage per hour and without benefits. You are doing this because you love nursing, are good at it and have a lot to give of your expertise and profession. You are doing this because you have assessed for yourself that you do not have the physical and/or mental capability to work long hours under great physical, mental and emotional stress. It is not self serving or greedy - it is because it fits the tolerance of your well being and care for others.

So what now???? I hope you find better than I have. Home Health/Hospice was mentioned. You bet!, we would be a great addition. Only regretful denials from here (and I was the first nurse hired to them back in the early '80's). Volunteer - - well isn't that sweet. Between my limited reserve of energy and managing my finances to stay alive . . . . well, I must 'volunteer' for me and my family to keep things afloat. (Though, I must admit the person and nurse in me wants to volunteer for many things.) I am glad that your Social Security income 'barely' manages your subsistence. For me, it is about half of what is needed to maintain my home [of 30+ years) and other monthly bills.

So what do you do? It is so hard to say. You have a gift and a love and experience that gives you such great worth. I wish for you that it does not turn to depression and hopelessness as it seems to have done for me.

You do have options. As long as you are secure to maintain your current livelihood - do what you love and enjoy, the best you can, for as long as you can. You can be a woman, stronger than me, to advance the true concept of nursing in a way that only you can.

Bless you for the courage to start this line of forum. It already shows that you are wise and with discretion.

[nursemae]

I know there are companies that staff sitters for people of differing needs, or people who do this on their own. There are many different varieties of patient care needs - some just need a babysitter, some need help with care, some need medical care. It seems to pay quite well and many of the professional sitters I met while in one of my hospitals seemed to really like it. They have the bond you get with working long-term care, the work isn't as taxing as nursing and they make a good paycheck. I wish I had more information in how to get involved in that kind of work but your Google-Fu can probably find quite a bit.

Best of luck to you, in whatever you find to do. Thank you for all the years of service you've already given, and thank you for the years of service I'm sure you're still going to give.

[carolmaccas66, BSN, RN]

You sounded like one terrific nurse! I'm sorry all this has happened to you. You sound very lonely and lost.

I used to do reading for kids at a primary (elementary) school. Also you can go on various websites to see who needs what help with things, ie: we have one called gumtree where you can find work wanted ads, or people who may need help with studying, home care, whatever. Some advertise for volunteers, others will pay you.

Also what about studying for something else similar to nursing? You could do some short courses and maybe look into home health care, or work in a small doctor's office.

I'd also ask around some of the charities for whatever help you can get if money is tight, and also go to your local employment office & see if ur entitled to any money for ur disability. Also ring your phone & utility companies to see if u can get a discount on your bills. There are lots of ways to save money ie: shopping at thrift shops, buying food in bulk & swopping with a neighbour, growing ur own veggies & herbs, walking & using buses.

I hope u find something to help you out. Sounds like u just need someone to talk to. What about getting a wee dog or cat for company?

[Warpster]

Some of the best advice I ever got from an instructor in nursing school was always to have something outside of nursing that captured your interest enough to occupy your time when you were no longer able to work such an intensely physical job.

I took that advice and now do my hobbies full time, able to hone them as I never could when I was exhausted from working.

In other words, when you figure out what your bliss is, whether it's knitting or volunteering at nursing homes, follow it.

[carolmaccas66, BSN, RN]

Some of the best advice I ever got from an instructor in nursing school was always to have something outside of nursing that captured your interest enough to occupy your time when you were no longer able to work such an intensely physical job.

I took that advice and now do my hobbies full time, able to hone them as I never could when I was exhausted from working.

In other words, when you figure out what your bliss is, whether it's knitting or volunteering at nursing homes, follow it.

I think this is great advice.

What hobbies do you do Warpster?

[rita359]

Don't know your age or current functional level but , if you need income, got information in the mail last week about an online 6 month course preparing one tuition free to implement and maintain electronic health records. It isn't bedside nursing but sounds like it would be something in which you would use what you know. Some area of IT might be a good fit.

[dbscandy]

Could you not do work as a telephone nurse? Perhaps you could look into that?

[Warpster]

I think this is great advice.

What hobbies do you do Warpster?

As my name suggests, I'm a weaver. I also spin, dye, knit, crochet, sew and do just about anything with a handful of fluff that can be done. And now that I'm not exhausted from working 12 hour night shifts, I'm getting better at it.

[nursegirl75]

With your experiences, why don't you work at the call center as a call nurse? There are hospitals like Kaiser that has call centers, where patients call nurses who help guide the patient with diagnosis or help the patient book appointments with doctors. My school did a rotation there and it was amazing.

many of the nurses there had years of experiences and didn't want to do bed-side nursing anymore so they used their nursing knowledge at the call center. The nurses there are so relaxed and enjoy what they were doing. :)

[traumaRUs, MSN, APRN]

Moving to Retired or Inactive Nurses forum.