Resident Thinks I’m A Fake Nurse

[Streetnurse42]

We got a new resident admitted to our LTC. He’s alert and oriented. He’s in his 60s.

Anyways I’m hard of hearing. It’s been incredibly difficult for me to understand everyone with masks on but my manager and the team have been amazing and supportive. 

So this morning I introduced myself to the resident and briefly explained that I’m hard of hearing, so I would appreciate if he could speak up loudly.

he couldn’t believe his eyes. He asked me if I was actually deaf. I showed him my hearing aids (I was wearing a bun at the time).  He said that I can’t be a nurse because people with disabilities shouldn’t be nurses. I was heartbroken but moved on. Later on it was my turn to give meds to him. Upon seeing me enter his room, he loudly yelled that he doesn’t want me and demanded a “real” nurse. 

My manager has my back. But this shook me up. In my few years of nursing (I graduated in 2019), I have never had a complaint and my clients always raved about my performance. This resident left me disappointed. 

[gcupid]

On 1/14/2022 at 12:43 AM, Streetnurse42 said:

We got a new resident admitted to our LTC. He’s alert and oriented. He’s in his 60s.

Anyways I’m hard of hearing. It’s been incredibly difficult for me to understand everyone with masks on but my manager and the team have been amazing and supportive. 

So this morning I introduced myself to the resident and briefly explained that I’m hard of hearing, so I would appreciate if he could speak up loudly.

he couldn’t believe his eyes. He asked me if I was actually deaf. I showed him my hearing aids (I was wearing a bun at the time).  He said that I can’t be a nurse because people with disabilities shouldn’t be nurses. I was heartbroken but moved on. Later on it was my turn to give meds to him. Upon seeing me enter his room, he loudly yelled that he doesn’t want me and demanded a “real” nurse. 

my manager has my back. But this shook me up. In my few years of nursing (I graduated in 2019), I have never had a complaint and my clients always raved about my performance. This resident left me disappointed. 

Tough skin should develop and get thicker as the years go by.  Own and embrace your disability wholeheartedly.  You must learn to assess and work thru any possible insecurity you may have because people can be ignorant and mean in nature.  

I suggest you start coming up with multiple witty responses to possible inevitable scenarios in the future or start learning some "your momma jokes" or learn to dig at their insecurity or be assertive & redirect the conversation or educate in a matter of fact approach.  

[hppygr8ful, ASN, RN, EMT-I]

Remember it's never about you!

Hppy

[vintagegal, BSN, DNP, RN, NP]

This is an HR situation. 
this is discrimination against you, who has a disability. If the residents behavior isn’t corrected now, he will continue to harass people later on.

[hppygr8ful, ASN, RN, EMT-I]

4 hours ago, vintagegal said:

This is an HR situation. 
this is discrimination against you, who has a disability. If the residents behavior isn’t corrected now, he will continue to harass people later on.

As the resident is not an employee I'm not sure they (HR) have any power to change the resident's behavior. Average cost of LTC care is about 8-10K a month and I don't see the bean counters risking the loss of revenue. I believe a care conference is in order to inform the gentle man that the nurse is a highly trained individual fully capable of care she has been assigned to give.

Hppy

[chrisjk]

When something happens during the course of the day to "bum me out" I find that playing Taylor Swift's "Shake It Off" really really helps(I especially recommend the video with the policeman hamming it up).....and practicing mind over matter ie "if you don't mind it doesn't matter" helps also.  

[SmilingBluEyes]

7 hours ago, vintagegal said:

This is an HR situation. 
this is discrimination against you, who has a disability. If the residents behavior isn’t corrected now, he will continue to harass people later on.

No it is not an HR situation. HR cannot control the resident's behavior. Only if staff discriminate (follow the patient's lead) can this be an HR concern.

[0.9%NormalSarah, BSN, RN]

Some patients are buttheads just as some people are...or lots of people if you ask me, but I’m dead inside LOL. You can still treat him with the best and kindest care, but in your head just know he’s a butthead. Oh and yes a care conference may be in order so you can at least get in there and do your job. 

[Meowmix398]

I'm sorry you're going through this. No ones competency should be judged based on their disability. The advice on here has been good so all I want to offer is some well wishes and to hold your head up OP. 

[emergenceRN17, ASN, BSN, RN]

Yikes!  Sorry that you are going through this.  Dealing with bad behavior can be so difficult some times.  Its funny how perception works... there will always be those who "perceive" you in a different light.  Try not to let it bother you (easier said than done, I know)  Wishing you the best!