Religion in the Room

Nurses Spirituality

Updated:   Published

I'm a NS, and I've been wondering what role religion does or can play out in patient care.

Let me say first, that while I'm personally a big Jesus fan I DO NOT believe in pushing my beliefs on others. But my question is, if a patient were to ever ask their nurse to pray with them, for them, etc is this generally allowed?

Or is it mostly a frowned upon practice, or maybe more of a facility based decision?

Really interested in your thoughts on this.

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once, a patient was watching a gospel station and said, you've heard of "the carters" haven't you? and when i said no, he said, well, you're a christian, aren't you? i said, "i've just never heard of the carters." which didn't say, "yes, i'm christian" or "no, i'm not."

If someone ever asked me that, I would have answered very seriously "yes, Carter was the President in the late 1970's. I know all about him." I guess that is not the Carter in question? LOL.

Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

I've prayed for/with patients if they've asked, but only if they've asked. Usually it's the family that's just experienced a fetal loss that asks for it; not too many healthy families of healthy babies feel the need postpartum. I did have a Byzantine Catholic family once have their priest come up to bless their new baby daughter, and I happened to walk in while he was there. He asked me if I wanted a blessing, I thought, sure, I'll take all the blessings I can get. Priest sprinkled me with holy water and they all said a blessing over me. That was nice, even though I'm not Catholic. Plus, the holy water smelled really good. (And I live in the South, we are not all Catholic-phobes. ;) )

When I was in labor with my daughter back in May, I had a minor meltdown when I got to 9cm and asked my labor nurse (she is also my friend 'outside' so I happened to know her religious beliefs) to pray with me. So she, my husband, and I joined hands and they both prayed. It helped tremendously and I calmed down and was ready to push within a very short while.

I'd argue that there is a place for religion (if a person believes) in our job setting, just not a place for religion to be pushed. It's not about me. It's about what works for my patient right then. If they want to pray, I'll pray with them; if they want to chant to Jah, I'll stand by while they do. I have a friend who is atheist who prays the Lord's Prayer with her patients when they ask her to pray; even though she doesn't believe the prayer will do any good she recognizes that it won't do her any harm to be there for her patients. No lightning bolts have come from the sky yet. :)

Thanks to all for replies. I second Elvish we're not all Catholic-phobes in the south. :lol2:

Specializes in Mental health, substance abuse, geriatrics, PCU.

Even though I'm not christian I will still pray with a patient if they ask me to. When a patient is scared, in pain, dying, etc. sometimes that prayer gives them more comfort than anything else that I can do and the whole reason that I'm there is to provide them comfort in their times of distress.

The only time I get uncomfortable with religion is when a patient asks "Have you accepted Jesus as your savior?" to me inquiring about one's spiritual beliefs is very personal especially since mine are frequently misunderstood by the vast majority of people. I admit most of the time when that question is posed to me, I lie and say that I am a christian, once again just to provide comfort. On one hand I realize that I shouldn't have to lie about my beliefs but on the other hand it's not about me and that little white lie avoids a lot of potential conflict and provides comfort to the patient.

I also become uncomfortable when my co-workers try to force their religion down my throat or try to chase me into their church so that I can be "enlightened" as I'm apparently seen by many to be a "lost soul" and the light of their god would be able to solve my weirdness. :monkeydance: To be honest I find that type of attitude as downright offensive, it's good to be proud of your spiritual beliefs but one's pride should never replace one's wisdom and a wise person knows that spirituality is a personal thing and not one set of beliefs can work for every person.

Specializes in Trauma Surgery, Nursing Management.
TheMoonisMyLantern said:

I also become uncomfortable when my co-workers try to force their religion down my throat or try to chase me into their church so that I can be "enlightened" as I'm apparently seen by many to be a "lost soul" and the light of their god would be able to solve my weirdness. :monkeydance: To be honest I find that type of attitude as downright offensive, it's good to be proud of your spiritual beliefs but one's pride should never replace one's wisdom and a wise person knows that spirituality is a personal thing and not one set of beliefs can work for every person.

Oh yes. I have been in this situation myself. One day, I was circulating a case with a scrub tech that was very outspoken about her religion (I live in the South). She was asking me what day I was getting married, because she knew that I was planning my wedding. Sweet girl, only the best of intentions...until she asked me the next question. She asked, "Does your fiance live far from you?" I replied, "We live together and have for the past 3 years." She then goes into "preaching mode" about how I was a Jezebel (sp?), that I should never have let a man soil me prior to marriage, and that she would be willing to pray with me to cleanse my soul. All of this during a lap chole-and the surgeon was my husband's best friend!

Talk about awkward!

All the replies are from those that are comfortable, even if you are not religious, but what if you are not comfortable?

A little background... I am not comfortable myself with what I do or do not believe. I am still trying to find my way and what works for me. Because of my uncertainty, I do not discuss religion.

I very very strongly believe in the power of prayer. I also very strongly believe in the power of religion. However, that doesn't make me comfortable participating in prayer, even silently bowing my head for grace etc. Every time I do it just so I won't have to go into explanations why I do not, it leaves me feeling very icky. Like I not only lied to myself, but also to the people that believe so strongly in the words they say.

Anyway, I feel like I would feel more comfortable even if I was an atheist because then I would believe strongly in what I believed, but being uncertain causes a great deal of weirdness.

My question is, should I just put that aside for the wellbeing of my pts? Is it ok to grab another nurse to pray with them? Suggest to call the chaplain?

After reading all the responses I'm just worried that attempting to do what is right for myself and the patient (getting someone else to pray) might in turn offend the PT more if I don't do it when specifically asked.....

I should mention I'm from the south where (it has been discussed already lol) people get highly offended about religion or lack thereof...,

Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

Arctic, if you are not comfortable praying with patients who ask, it is perfectly appropriate to tell the pt you'll call either the chaplain or their own clergy to come up and pray with them. If they want to call their clergy themselves, that's okay too.

Maybe you can couch it in phraseology like, "I'll be glad to call the chaplain for you about that, since they are the experts and I really want you to get your needs met. I'll be glad to stay in the room while they're here if you like." That way the patient gets their needs met and won't (if they're reasonable) feel like you're abandoning them.

I know it's hard to be in a state of uncertainty yourself. It's okay. You do have the right to be true to yourself in those matters. :) Kudos to you for wanting to meet your patients' needs despite your own internal uncertainties.

Specializes in ER.

Yeek- Gotta tell you, some of the responses on this post are scaring me! I'm an out and out Pagan- I wear a Pentacle to work, Met my husband at a (Clothing optional!! GASP) Pagan Campground- Most of my chosen family are Pagans as well. I've had a few negative interactions with patients at the hospital where I work- Up here in central NY. BTW, my hubby and I are traveling to TN in 2 weeks to look at houses, because we are planning on relocating. I'm more than a little concerned over how I will be treated "down south"- As far as praying with my patients, I have no problem respectfully bowing my heaqd while they pray- Why wouldn't I?

Hospice Nurse LPN said:
I think it's a little different in hospice nursing. People know they are getting near the end of life and most do tend to become more spiritual/religious. Religion affiliation is one of the questions asked upon admit. I've been asked many times by both pt and PCG to pray w/ them. I have also offered to contact the pastor/preist. In my area, most everyone is either Baptist or Catholic. I remind my Catholic families to have the priest come to administer the sacriment of the sick, as sometimes they forget. Of course, for those pts who claim "no religion" or "agnostic" I allow them to bring up the spiritual aspect of dying, if they chose to.

I'm currently an inpatient hospice volunteer (hoping to become a hospice nurse ;)). Not long ago I spent time with a very pleasant 84-year-old woman who wasn't imminent yet (but hoping to be). We had a great conversation, watched TV preachers, and then she looked at me and asked "Are you saved?" (This is in the Deep South, BTW).

It made me very uncomfortable and I felt like I failed this pt. Although I consider all beliefs (including no beliefs) to be equally valid, I'm certainly no born-again Christian (agnostic comes closest). Of course, this was not what she wanted to hear, so I tried to deflect the question back to her; it didn't work. Then I offered to contact the chaplain; didn't work. Finally she looked at me and said, "Maybe I'm still around so I could witness to you." After that, it wasn't so ackward anymore (and she later told me she had enjoyed my company).

But just what is the best approach if a hospice (ar any) pt puts you on the spot like that?

DeLana

Specializes in M/S, Travel Nursing, Pulmonary.
JDougRN said:
Yeek- Gotta tell you, some of the responses on this post are scaring me! I'm an out and out Pagan- I wear a Pentacle to work, Met my husband at a (Clothing optional!! GASP) Pagan Campground- Most of my chosen family are Pagans as well. I've had a few negative interactions with patients at the hospital where I work- Up here in central NY. BTW, my hubby and I are traveling to TN in 2 weeks to look at houses, because we are planning on relocating. I'm more than a little concerned over how I will be treated "down south"- As far as praying with my patients, I have no problem respectfully bowing my heaqd while they pray- Why wouldn't I?

See, you best thank your blessings you don't work with me. I'd annoy the living daylights outta you with questions about the "clothes optional" areas:

1. Do red head girls go there?

2. What ages are the people?

3. Do blondes go there?

4. How many brunettes on an avg. day?

5. Is it rude to stare?

6. Do you have to be Pagan?

7. What car would work best as a babe magnet in that type of area?

8. Am I allowed to practice CPR with a few of the chicks (minus chest pumping)?

Specializes in cardiology/oncology/MICU.
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I'm a NS, and I've been wondering what role religion does or can play out in patient care.

Let me say first, that while I'm personally a big Jesus fan I DO NOT believe in pushing my beliefs on others. But my question is, if a patient were to ever ask their nurse to pray with them, for them, etc is this generally allowed?

Or is it mostly a frowned upon practice, or maybe more of a facility based decision?

Really interested in your thoughts on this.

If my patients are praying with their families or pastor, I typically gently close the door to allow privacy. I also close the doo whenever I am performing care for privacy. If my patients ask for prayer, what kind of Christian would I be to tell them no? I do it with the door closed for privacy. I am not perfect nor do I push my beliefs on others. I am sure there are many on this site that have different religious beliefs than I do, and they may not agree with what I think on this subject of prayer with patients. My God encourages me to love others and do for them the simplest, most humble things. If ever you read some of my post about nurses and patient care, you will see that I believe all of what we do begins with the simplest things such as bathing and brushing teeth or dentures. These are definately not always the top priority in an ICU where avoiding septic shock or myocardial damage often are my first concern. Religion can be a very integral part of nursing and sometimes it is exactly what the patient wants and/or needs. For those who do not agree, you can always sk the chaplain to come by. ?

Specializes in ICU, Telemetry.
Arcticrainbows said:

My question is, should I just put that aside for the wellbeing of my pts? Is it ok to grab another nurse to pray with them? Suggest to call the chaplain?

After reading all the responses I'm just worried that attempting to do what is right for myself and the patient (getting someone else to pray) might in turn offend the PT more if I don't do it when specifically asked.....

I should mention I'm from the south where (it has been discussed already lol) people get highly offended about religion or lack thereof...,

Your religion (yes, no or maybe) is completely up to you. Don't let anyone make you feel bad about what you feel, or don't feel, this job's hard enough as it is. In your shoes, I'd probably tell them that I had to give a timed medicine, but I would send in another member of the team (I'd call the chaplain or snag a religious coworker). We always have to give a timed med, you don't hurt their feelings or upset them, and the chaplain gets a visit with someone he/she needs to see.

And there are religious practices I'd draw the line at. You drag a sacrificial animal into your room, I'm so outta there.

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