I had a conversation with a public health nurse yesterday while I was updating my shots (word to the wise, don't do Hep A&B and TDaP in the same arm). A quote from today reminded me of it: If you want to see how people really live, do some in home nursing care. pts houses I've been to would make a pig look as clean as a new bar of soap from the box. As a paramedic I've seen the worst of the worst. I don't know how many times I have almost pucked from the stench and filth of some peoples houses.
The nurse and I were talking and she mentioned an obese INFANT she had visited and how coming to my house for a newborn assessment had been a real pleasure because it was clean and I feed my children well. I should mention that my house is not really clean, at least as I'd like it. Or maybe it's just cluttered from three kids and I'm picky, whatever, but she related some pretty depressing stories. I mentioned that it would be incredibly hard for me to be tolerant of certain behaviors, smoking in the house/car/wherever with small kids especially, for instance. I know that for the most part, people are doing the best they know how, and oftentimes they're repeating several generations of learned behavior. But in today's information-rich society, I find it hard to be sympathetic to pepole who do things that are in no way, beneficial to anyone, smoking being the obvious first example.
How do you offer sympathetic, genuine care when you see someone doing something stuipd* over and over again? And how do you keep trying when it's clear that people don't want the education you can offer? I know I need to work on this, so I'm looking for hints, tips, and anecdotes to guide me.
Thanks!
*Stupid isn't the word I want but I can't brain today, sorry!
Here is a tip for those that can't keep immaculate houses. Whenever you are feeling down and feel like your house isn't clean, watch Hoarders on A&E, makes you feel like you have the cleanest house on the block!!!!
That and Super Nanny get me through my week sometimes.
I am an ex smoker and know that I struggled with that addiction. It's the only one I've ever had. I often think about it when I have patients with addictions or other issues.
Unfortunately my mother too is a smoker and now that she is seventy she is struggling with multiple health issues. She's in another country I can not check on her all the time.
I do know this, she is my mother and I love her. I'd hate for some nurse out there to be judging her or not giving her the care she will allow them to give her because of it.
That's how I get over patients that I feel judgmental about.
I know I'm not perfect, I do not expect my patients to be perfect, yes I will vent on this forum only about the more trying patients I've had sometimes.
I hope that I've never shown any judgmental behavior towards my patients (though I know I've had the sentiment)
This will not be a problem that you will encounter only in PH as others have mentioned, you will encounter this in all areas of nursing. It can be very hard some times. Just last week I had to care for a pimp whose group of women would not leave his bedside, several times I had to call security to get them to leave. Seeing the way he treated all women (myself included) made me want to throttle him. Very demanding, condescending, and basically just a jerk.
I have to admit I struggle with this problem myself quite often and have not found a great solution. I just suck it up, be polite and professional and try very hard to not let it affect the care I give. Oh and I have a great coworker I vent to on a daily basis. That helps.
I'm starting to think a counselor is a good idea when I start working. Just someone to throw my dirt at after work, kwim? Probably someone who can help me learn some skills to use instead of punching people in the skull for being dumb.
Specializes in M/S, MICU, CVICU, SICU, ER, Trauma, NICU.
Here is a tip for those that can't keep immaculate houses. Whenever you are feeling down and feel like your house isn't clean, watch Hoarders on A&E, makes you feel like you have the cleanest house on the block!!!!
Amen. I genuinely feel for these people--the pain is so much...so sad.
Hoarders on A&E is a funny show. I saw one where the lady didn't want to throw away really old expired food from the fridge. Hey everyone has there own ways. I don't judge.
What a thought provoking refreshing question....I am very impressed with the OP.
The fact that you are asking about what most everyone is thinking is awesome....it is something we all struggle with and the fact that you are asking the question tells me something wonderful about you...
I disagree that we can't share cases with one another without identifying people...it is how we work through things, debrief and learn.
You can and will think many things along the way about how people choose to live....we treat people as though they have capacity and until there is a trigger we do not question how people choose to live their lives (trigger may include safety of self or other)......those that are doing an excellent job use creative ways to decrease risk and offer solutions and what people choose to do is up to them....we measure our success by meeting the needs of the group we are caring for....not what makes us feel better when everything is neat and tidy and tied up with a bow....one of my greatest lessons in life and work.
Good luck in whatever you choose to do....I imagine you will do wonderful things.
I would provide assistance and care for the problem they came in with. Sometimes when patients come in they have a variety of problems and you need to ask them what they hope to get out of this admission, I think the same would apply to in home care. If you are with the same client for a while a relationship might build that would make them more trusting and receptive to information you share.
this is a wonderful approach.
simply asking them, 'how can i help you...would you care to learn about x, y, z?', can open up many opportunities...
or not.
and you needn't ask this on day 1...ideally this will occur when pt feels a bit more familiar with you.
as someone else posted, we all have our prejudices.
the crux of my pt population, has been the junkies, street folks, gangs, the destitute, etc.
i have found that rather than anticipate any perceived needs, directly asking what they want/need is conducive to a more productive and fulfilling relationship for nurse and pt.
cmonkey
613 Posts
That and Super Nanny get me through my week sometimes.