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Hello everyone,
I'm new nurse and I would like to hear from some of the experience nurses about this situation. I'm new male in nursing and add to that I came from another country in the middle east but I became a US citizen last year and I got my degree in nursing here in the US too. My question is that I had a female older white patient for one shift and I was extremely professional and I did great job taking care of her and she was also nice to me and never mention anything or say anything wrong, well the second day I came back to work and I was suppose to have the same patients I had last night but when I arrived the charge nurse notified me that this lady refuse foreigners and blacks to take care of her because of her religion believes, I was so depressed and frustrated to hear that because I did my best to help her, I'm frustrated because this is racism more than religion believes. I understand people are different but at least she should refused my care in the first day not when I left. Sometimes I had a hard time dealing with situations like these I feel its personal thing and I know its not my fault but how can I overcome situations like these?
Sorry to say but I disagree with you totally. Many patients use excuses they feel are more "credible" than one that is pure horse pucky. I have seen it too many times especially from little old ladies. They will say what they think is the most believable OR what they think you will buy into. I have had so many patients talk dirt about another nurse trying to get me to go along with them. I never would buy into it but sometimes when I asked a few probative questions I hit pay dirt so to speak and found the females really did not want a man doing "personal" things for them even though the male RN had always been respectful, preserved their dignity and did a good job. I also had men who refused care from male RNs so it goes along with the entire spectrum of race, ethnicity, sex, etc. Most of the guys I worked with were able to get around the discrimination after a while. I would go in with them if there was any question and we'd work on it. Some of our lols started asking for the guys because they did a nice job. One of my co-workers was a very dark skinned Nigerian native with a thick accent. He was schooled here in the States, working on a masters. He was a body builder and muscular. I heard complaints about him because he was "strong". Never bought it, never bought into it. I went with him all the time, teaming up and once people got used to him they were screaming for him. He always went the extra mile for patients. On the other hand if I yelled for him in a code situation he was there in a heart beat or faster. We had our jobs and we did them well, meshed with each other well.
My question comes from a different angle - I am an older, red-headed, blue-eyed evening charge nurse in an area of Canada that, up until recently has been mainly rural and Caucasian, but we are close enough to the city that nurses and PSWs (personal support workers) commute from an area that is mostly immigrants from India. I was raised to be extremely upset at injustice and it frankly pi**es me off when residents (LTC) and family members treat these nurses, my friends, as anything less than my equal - and then think I'm going to agree with them because of my age and ethnicity.
Two extreme examples are: 1)I have had a family member that I thought was a lovely and funny gentleman, actually say to me "I'm going to tell you this, because unlike that thing at the desk, you can talk." (She had taken down the information perfectly correctly.) 2) I've had people on the phone ask to speak to someone that could talk properly and give them correct information - she already had - 3 times. And then there are the residents that make racists comments such as "why is everyone new that works here so dark" that I try to attribute to dementia.
Here in Canada we don't have the same issues with customer service surveys, but obviously you need to be polite. How do I let people know that this is unacceptable, without embarrassing my amazing coworkers and/or creating a scene and getting fired or arrested for trying to knock some sense into people?
A 92 year old severely contracted man still had a mind as sharp as a tack. He was so severely contracted he even had facial paralysis but you could still make out what he was saying. I was still in nursing school at the time so the racial break-in started early. He made some comment to me that was something like, "You people are really coming over from south of the boarder." I responded, "South of the boarder? What??" He said, "Don't like act you don't know what I'm talking about. Like you're not Mexican." Me: "Sir, I'm not Mexican. I'm not even Hispanic..." Him: "Yeah, right." I made the mistake of talking about it in our clinical debriefing and my instructor and class thought it was the funniest thing. Needless to say the rest of the semester I had nicknames to match my new found ethnicity.:)
This was about 20 years ago, I live in an area with many cultures: we had a tourist from back east somewhere, who looked up at my coworker and asked "and how long have you been here, my dear?" with a really condescending tone. I looked up at my friend, then back at the woman and said "oh yeah, she swam over with Cortez about 400 years ago".
This was about 20 years ago, I live in an area with many cultures: we had a tourist from back east somewhere, who looked up at my coworker and asked "and how long have you been here, my dear?" with a really condescending tone. I looked up at my friend, then back at the woman and said "oh yeah, she swam over with Cortez about 400 years ago".
That's funny! I had a Caucasian patient, very proud of his Italian ancestors. His mother, a tiny 97 year old who was sharp as a tack loved to tell stories about the Italian village she was born and raised in and coming to America with her tiny baby (my patient), One morning, my patient greeted morning rounds and the physician of Asian descent with "Chinka Chinka Chinka chink." He lay in bed, very proud of himself. I knew the physician in question was third generation.
"Shame on you, Henry!" I told him. "Dr. Hong is more American than you."
"What do you mean?"
"His parents and grandparents were born in this country. You weren't."
A very embarrassed patient apologized to the physician, and I never heard any such comments from him again.
Proud why? You, myself and everyone else did nothing on our end to earn anything. Skin color actually is a mere genetic trait which serves only to protect us from sunlight. It is actually hubris to claim pride over a trait you did nothing to earn. All my skin/eye color tell me is my ancestors came from a colder climate...racial pride does nothing to promote harmony.
Had a patient recently demand no blacks, Asians, Indians or men take care of them. It was the middle of the night when they were admitted. All of the nurses came into the patients room to help settle the patient. We were all black, Asian, Indian, or male. Explained the situation to the patient and asked her to choose. No other nurses in the whole hospital qualified to care for her. She simply smiled and said nevemind. Didn't have another issue with her. Score one for the nurses!!!
I think it's wrong to give in to BS. My favorite is when females don't want male nurses. Not talking about religious/cultural reasons, just run of the mill idiots. I will NOT change assignments once the shift has started! I also hate when my male co-workers ask me to bedpan, Foley, whatever their female pt. Really! When I've seen more male crotch than a hooker!
In the case of a male RN who has an "idiot" that does not want a male to do things of a personal nature I agree that I would not do the task for them but I will stand by for them so that there is no suggestion of inappropriate behavior on the part of the RN. Just makes sense not to invite trouble and there are plenty of people out there who have $$$$ in the eyes and are waiting for a chance to sue someone. Would never want one of my male coworkers put in that position. I would make the time to stand in with them. In all my years I never had a male RN ask me to do anything for them, only with them. Big difference. Besides, when we had men who tried to hit on me or hit me my male coworkers always stood by with me. The important thing is that we accomplished things together. I think that the general population is now used to men being caregivers, they let male doctors to whatever! To me, and this may be my personal prejudice, if you are sick enough and need help it does not matter who walks through the door to help you. You will take the help from who ever arrives.
I think it's wrong to give in to BS. My favorite is when females don't want male nurses. Not talking about religious/cultural reasons, just run of the mill idiots. I will NOT change assignments once the shift has started! I also hate when my male co-workers ask me to bedpan, Foley, whatever their female pt. Really! When I've seen more male crotch than a hooker!
I don't think male nurses are any less qualified than female nurses, or that they are not as good as female nurses. I am perfectly fine with having male nurses if I was a patient. As a domestic abuse survivor, if I were a patient that needed a foley, I'd either need a female nurse or a lot of Xanax (and even then). It's not about whether the man has "seen more [female] crotch than a hooker," or anything ideology-related, it's about the fact that I'd have a full blown panic attack and it's not something I can just think away by knowing the guy's a good nurse. I understand women who can't have men perform certain tasks for good reasons and I don't think they're "run of the mill idiots."
As a nurse in my professional duties, I don't mind taking on a task for my male colleagues because the woman can't have them perform some tasks. I won't judge them or get annoyed with them. But maybe that's just me and my level of compassion for the patient.
Edited to add: No, I do not have any problems handling male patients either. When you're a patient, you've vulnerable and have no dignity to begin with. When I'm the nurse, I'm in my professional role. I also pass no judgment on men that can't have me perform certain tasks on them. I don't know all their life experiences and why would I make them relive something because I can't hang up my "but I'm your nurse" ego?
I am from an area of the country that is predominately Caucasian and have experienced indirect aspects of racism. Many times my patients will either assume I'm the aide or talk to my CNA, who is of the same race, of which I then receive the pleasure of letting them know I am the nurse. Many times most are polite about it but you can still sense it in their behaviors. I don't get mad or hold it against them but instead use it as an opportunity to shine and do what I do best and provide excellent patient care.
Rn 1979
112 Posts
With all my respect to your opinion I believe YES this is 100 % racism case. I do respect this racist patient believes and emotions but if she was raped by someone like me as you are suggested she might just reject my care in the first night and she wont even let me touching her at all, I provided a 12 perfect care for this patient and when I left she said sorry I don't need foreigners or blacks to be my caregiver and another fact I would like to emphasis that I'm a US citizen like anyone else and I gained it by my hard work not by birth only so instead of labeling me you could just care about your health instead of labeling people left and right. Again I do respect all kind of thinking except of racism !!!!