racist patients

EdieBrous, BSN, MSN · Sep 28, 2016

I disagree that you cannot do anything or that you should not take it personally & should just accept it. You might have a discrimination claim against your employer for entertaining racist staffing & assignment requests. Check out CHANEY v. PLAINFIELD HEALTHCARE CENTER, 09-3661 (7th Cir. 7-20-2010) and Hurley paid nearly $2

moldyoldyrn · Sep 28, 2016

I am wondering if has more to do with the fact you are male than anything else. I worked with a slew of male nurses and most of them had the same problem at some time in their career. My issue with the whole thing was that they were all such good guys and competent RNs. These were guys I would have let take care of me or my family. My take on your situation is 1- talk to the charge RN and see if you can get any other information, maybe there is something she has not told you. Ask so that you know in the future how to avoid any pitfalls that might have occurred. 2-Do not let it bother you. This behavior abounds everywhere. Bow out gracefully, apologize if you have done something wrong, if not keep on trucking'. Go back and just stick your head in her door, don't walk in, and just say "HI, hope you are doing well", and leave it at that. People will use almost any reason they can come up with to rationalize stuff like this, move on and hold your head up and practice above board and with professionalism. Also in the future, if you have any doubts take a female staff member in with you. I ran interference for the guys all the time. Of course they did the same for me especially when there was a coorifice male patient. If there are other male RNs around you talk to them, get their take on it. Might start a support group.

Takucle · Sep 28, 2016

I am a male black RN practicing in Canada and have not experienced such situations here in Canada. Maybe it is due to the fact that I experienced severe open racism in Europe and China. Most patients are good and a few racists patients not make you feel bad. I always laughed at people who make racist comments and very proud to be a black because my creator knows why he created me black. Also when I look around I see myself leaving a better life than most of the racist folks. I for once I treat people as individuals not base on their race because you would fine mean people from all races.

kfostercma · Sep 28, 2016

I'm a white male nurse with 2 years of experience kind of coasting by with my privilege. When it got to the point where I started to question whether I was really doing well at my job or if my white maleness is responsible for my accomplishments, I asked some of my friends (not nurses).who are minorities what I should do. Most of them said I should use my position to praise my coworkers at all times. I know it sounds silly, but some of the elders I care for have started to trust my non-white colleagues. Perhaps you can challenge your coworkers who are white to compliment good work when they see it.

sevensonnets · Sep 28, 2016

I cannot tell you how many times over the years I have walked into a little old lady's room and been told, "Oh thank goodness, you're the first white face I've seen all day!" I used to be hesitant to reply to that and tried to ignore it. Now I say, It does not matter the color of the nurse's skin because we are all good nurses here and we all will take good care of you. That's it nothing more, and the subject is never brought up again. I refuse to play into that and I will stick up for my colleagues because we ARE all good nurses.

RutgersFlower2016 · Sep 28, 2016

Hi,

It sounds to me like you didn't do one thing wrong. You provided excellent care and felt great about the job you did and God saw it all.

It is sad but in this field you are going to see a lot of this unfortunately. That woman was being racist against you, and no religion, no religion and I study them all calls for this kind of behavior. That patient has a lot of personal problems that have absolutely nothing to do with you. You are beautiful whether you are Black, White, Asian, middle eastern, Catholic, Jewish, or Muslim.

Keep smiling, keep your head up, keep being the wonderful care taker you are and leave the rest in gods hands okay. Do not let any patient get you down with their racists practices. You deserve better and she should have been thankful towards you not hateful.

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RLJS · Sep 28, 2016

Unfortunately, patient satisfaction scores rank higher than employee satisfaction. I've had patient's decline to let me care for them. It bothered and frustrated me when I was a new nurse until my preceptor told me "you can please some of the people some of the time but not all of the people all of the time so just learn to let it go. It's their loss b/c you're a great nurse." It's usually some petty BS reason why they don't want you as their nurse anyway!

Sue Salisbury RN BSN, BSN, RN · Sep 28, 2016

Fayassin, I'm very sorry to hear you had that experience, and despite being Caucasian myself, I've had that experience. I learned to see it as my chance to see how discrimination feels-- I know it isn't the same as facing that regularly, but it helped me empathize. I have lived in Hawaii for many years and as a whole, we have so many cultures and races in Hawaii that we don't see serious discrimination - it would take way too much time, disruption and a great loss to everyone, and I wish the whole USA could learn that. We do pay attention to culture, as it affects giving good health care (how many family members must be allowed in the room at one time, etc), but discrimination among adults isn't common here. Feel free to move here to join us!

I was assigned a very traditional, elderly Japanese lady. She took one look at me and said I wouldn't do, I wasn't Japanese. As a young nurse (years ago!), it startled me, but the lady was sick, elderly, had some definite opinions, and I didn't want to be one of her problems. I found her a Japanese nurse, who laughed and laughed about the problem. Please don't take it personally - it may feel personal, but it really has no significance about you or your nursing abilities. You sound like a sincere nurse and that should make you a great one. Congrats on your USA citizenship and becoming a nurse. Aloha and best wishes in your career - good choice.

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Sep 29, 2016

I am wondering if has more to do with the fact you are male than anything else.

The original post clearly indicated that the patient who rejected the OP wanted no foreigners or blacks delivering her care.

If the patient in the original post insisted on no males, she would still be exposed to the black female caregivers and foreign female caregivers that she does not want touching her. Therefore, it is very unlikely that this has anything to do with the original poster being a male.

FNP2bMRL3 · Sep 29, 2016

the lady refuse foreigners and blacks to take care of her because of her religion believes, I was so depressed and frustrated to hear that because I did my best to help her, I'm frustrated because this is racism more than religion believes.

First, if you are truly interested in taking care of this female patient then you will respect her belief, whether it is religious or personal.........Taking care of patients emotionally, spiritually, psychologically is just as important as physically........REMEMBER she is the patient and it is NOT about YOU, no matter if you don't like her beliefs or how much you disagree with her........On top of that, I personally do not consider what you experienced racism until you know all the facts......For example, this female patient may have been previously raped by a male or someone from your ethnic descent which makes her relive the event and feel vulnerable every time you take care of her........You should never jump to conclusions and label your patients without knowing the FACTS first.......!!!

FYI - You will also experience patients who do not want you to take care of them because you are male.......That is not sexism.........!!!! IT MORE ABOUT THE PATIENTS and less about you! You chose to be a nurse and part of the deal is respecting the wishes of your patients. In other words, not everyone thinks the same nor should you be judgemental of your patients and expect them to.

jobellestarr · Sep 29, 2016

I kind of have a different take on asking people, nurses, etc., where they're from. I'm a white older woman and I am genuinely curious about cultures that I have not been exposed to. But I do preface my questions with "I hope you don't mind my asking". I had some wonderful discussions on planes, in hospital rooms, etc. The world is getting smaller and to me it's important to learn as much as I can about my fellow earth inhabitants. But to be rude and hurtful is another matter and that I won't tolerate. I have spoken up when patients say rude things to other staff, etc. I had a patient tell a Navajo nurse to go back to where she came from and I admit that I did somewhat gleefully tell him that she was Navajo and here first. To the OP: I am sorry that this happened to you and please don't take it personally. I hope for all of our sakes that the world is changing, surely but slowly.

moldyoldyrn · Sep 29, 2016

Some one please tell me why anyone, much less some one who may have to depend on you for their life, would talk to you that way. I will never understand this abusiveness that prevades the nursing profession. I have looked at patients who started that verbal abuse and confronted them nicely and said "I do not swear, cuss and call you names, how about you don't do it to me" and most of them back off, but it is hurtful and nasty and usually for no reason. But why they feel entitled to do it is really beyond me. You tell me your needs and I will do my best to meet them there is no need to be nasty. I will even ask you if I can touch you so you do not feel I am inappropriate. I am so sorry you face this abuse.