"Nurses eating their young" Can anyone give specific examples of this?

racing-mom4, BSN, RN · May 13, 2008

You are at a loss and ask for help and you get an eye roll and "What did they teach you in nursing school?"

I am sure others have way worse of scenarios, but this just happened to me last week so it is fresh in my mind.

Great post--cant wait to read more.

Antikigirl, ASN, RN · May 13, 2008

One day as a new hire at a hospital I was walking down the hall and heard a strange sound. It was a man in a room choking and sputtering blood out his mouth and nose!

I ran to the RN desk to get help, and we couldn't find his nurse (who was an older vetran nurse that is not known to be kind to patients or others!). We got to the room and he was filling up with blood in his lungs and was dying...

Long story short...the nurse was finally found and she CHEWED me out royal in front of the MD and family that I must have caused this by hearing him gag and tried to suction him...I never suctioned, I went to get help because I was new! Only thing I did was to try to establish airway with positioning...got other nurses within 30 second or so...no other intervention...

I was brought up by a review 5 months later as being a possible reason for death!?!?!? Thankfully I did ask for help and did have 3 nurses there to witness my actions and that I was not in the wrong...not to mention that while that nurse complained...I was learning how to get someone to the ICU fast since I was new...and jumped through many hurdles and got it done...bought him enough time to say goodbye to his family! Which is more, I can confidently say...than what she would have done!

Since I made it by that review by the skin of my teeth...she made my life a living heck afterwards! I finally had to leave! She would write me up for anything..my fault or not..and I had to swim backwards to cover myself daily! That was not productive at all..and if that facility allowed her to get away with that...I did NOT need to be there!

I was the first of 16 nurses that left within the next three months because of this nurse and other probelms! I guess I was just the first that said "this is bullshnookles, not what I signed up for as a nurse" and had the confidence to leave with a smile!

Honey...she bit me, and would have devored me whole if I had let her...but finally, I did grab her tongue so she couldn't eat me up again~!

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · May 13, 2008

Here are some classic "Eating the Young" statements . . .

1. "You should know that already."

2. "Figure it out on your own!"

3. "Awww. . . That's basic nursing 101."

4. "I'm going to report you!"

5. "Where's your nursing judgment?"

6. "I'm not going to help you!"

7. "I refuse to relieve you for your break!"

Tweety, BSN, RN · May 13, 2008

There's an interesting thread here where we like to confine this type of discussion. Take a look, pages and pages of examples: https://allnurses.com/forums/f8/do-nurses-eat-their-young-302909.html

hollyberry678 · May 13, 2008

Why would you like to confine this discussion to that sticky? I had a specific question...

aeauooo · May 13, 2008

Why would you like to confine this discussion to that sticky? I had a specific question...

This IS a sticky subject.

I could tell you my story, but it's too painful. I decided years ago that I need to let go of it so that I can move on, but it's a wound that, over ten years later, is still very tender to the touch.

oldiebutgoodie, RN · May 13, 2008

While arranging a personal leave with my manager because my father was dying, she decided that this was a good time to tell me about all the complaints about me from the other staff, including that "the sheets looked mussed up in the room", and that sometimes I "looked disheveled".

I have never experienced such cruelty from other staff and a manager ever. I transferred out as soon as possible. But the hurt is still there.

Oldiebutgoodie

allnurses Guide · May 13, 2008

I can give you specific examples of being treated badly by a co-worker in just about every job I've ever had from my first job as a teenager to now.

This kind of behavior is not exclusive to nursing. I don't even like the saying that "nurses" eat their young. Some nurses are rude. But not the vast majority. To generalize about an entire profession is not fair.

And that is why we have a sticky here - to talk about it. There are examples and opinions on both sides of the issue there.

My most grievous example is a man walking up behind me while I was typing and placing his hands on my breasts. This was a secretarial job.

My least grievous was today when I needed to borrow a stethoscope because I gave mine to my son for his day to be "helper" and sharing time but I ended up needing to see a patient before his time to share and the nurse I asked to borrow one of the extra steths on the floor said no.

steph

wonderbee, BSN, RN · May 14, 2008

It's a phrase I've come to despise. Nurses are under a lot of stress. There's not a lot of time for the courtship phase. It's sad but true. That being said, there are meanies out there. They're in every sector of every profession in society. Our best defense is our own voice.

bollweevil · May 14, 2008

Backbiting, gossiping, talking about you to others behind your back, refusing to help or teach you, stuff like that.

I remember the first time I circulated alone. The next day, my boss said that Dr. Butts said I wasn't ready to work alone. I thought I had done a darned good job and asked for examples, none of which were given to me. I didn't mind getting extra training but I did not appreciate the lack of justification.