Question about inmates

Nurse Ratched, RN · Jul 20, 2004

Our psych unit has a policy that staff (in the off-chance that they would choose to empbark on an ill-advised social relationship with a patient) may not interact with a patient "socially" after discharge for a set period of time - I believe it's six months. This is assuming, of course, that the people were not acquainted prior to the hospitalization. If they are, of course, the staff member is obliged to disclose the relationship so alternate staffing can be arranged to avoid a conflict of interest.

I would bet that your facility has a policy of some sort.

Altho you didn't ask for it, I will of course warn you against this. A female corrections officer locally was killed recently by her ex-inmate boyfriend, with whom she established a relationship during his incarceration.

Please also read this book.

Destinystar · Jul 20, 2004

i agree that you should seek factual info. and that book you were refered to looked way cool. read it and make an informed decision. sometimes as a nurse the life you save could be your own.:uhoh21: for the heck of it you might want to type sociopath or antisocial into a search and read up a little. it is very interesting.

if i work at a hospital and have had an inmate as a pt., if i were interested in writing to him once he is released and he asked me too, could i legally do this.? i have known nurses to marry inmates that were former patients. as long as there is nothing inappropriate while he is a patient, once he is released am i free to write or whatever? please this is very important if anyone knows the "rules" about this situation. i don't understand how this could be a problem. it seems to be the same situation as if a regular patient was to contact a former nurse and pursue a relationship which i have known several nurses who met their husbands as former patients. all opinions aside about "it's a bad idea to get involved with a manipulative inmate" i'm only seeking factual info. thanks alot.

Crawsu · Jul 27, 2004

Well, I work in corrections at the jail and the parameters are very clear. No relationships with inmates whatsoever. You have a choice between your job and pursuing a relationship with the inmate. You choose either. I don't know how this would apply to hospital nursing, but it seems a bad idea, either way. Many inmates can appear very charming on the surface, but don't believe everything they tell you, because many are sociopaths and adept at manipulating both people and the system Sorry to say that this is just a fact when dealing with most offenders.

If a friend or relative is incarcerated it is your duty to notify the dept. so that your contact is minimized at best.

Best of luck to you whatever decision you make. Just be warned that most are master manipulators. Remember Ted Bundy, he had all his friends fooled, and went on to commit many heinous crimes.

I would advise against it.

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Jul 27, 2004

OK, I'm going to cut to the chase: Are you a few Cheerios shy of a full bowl, or just desperate and lonely?!! Here's an example of an all-too-common scenario: My BIL has married four times since being in prison, and has left all four women devastated and penniless. And the last I heard, he was on the prowl for yet another victim---er, wife. :stone

I worry about anyone who seeks out prisoners for relationships, love, marriage and so forth. It isn't healthy. Please, get some counseling and find out why you are attracted to men who can't possibly provide you with a normal relationship and may, in fact, harm you emotionally, physically, and financially.

elkpark · Jul 27, 2004

There's nothing "illegal" about it, but most sensible people would consider it A REALLY BAD IDEA.

Ion · Aug 2, 2004

If I work at a hospital and have had an inmate as a pt., if I were interested in writing to him once he is released and he asked me too, could i legally do this.? I have known nurses to marry inmates that were former patients. As long as there is nothing inappropriate while he is a patient, once he is released am I free to write or whatever? Please this is very important if anyone knows the "rules" about this situation. I don't understand how this could be a problem. It seems to be the same situation as if a regular patient was to contact a former nurse and pursue a relationship which I have known several nurses who met their husbands as former patients. All opinions aside about "it's a bad idea to get involved with a manipulative inmate" I'm only seeking factual info. Thanks alot.

Factual info:

Nurse X has contact with Inmate B. Nurse X decides she wants to marry Inmate B after a while.

Chief Investigator plays audio recording of Inmate B on phone with his girlfriend plotting to kill Nurse X after wedding so inmate B and his girlfriend will own Nurse X's house and assets.

........................

It has been a while since you posted, hope you didn't get involved with the inmate.

Nurse_Peachie · Aug 3, 2004

Factual info:
Nurse X has contact with Inmate B. Nurse X decides she wants to marry Inmate B after a while.
Chief Investigator plays audio recording of Inmate B on phone with his girlfriend plotting to kill Nurse X after wedding so inmate B and his girlfriend will own Nurse X's house and assets.
........................
It has been a while since you posted, hope you didn't get involved with the inmate.

And that ladies and gentlemen, is how they do it in the world of PRISON!! It's a cold and hard way of life, but it is so true!

99.99% want something for nothing. If there are inmates who do not fall into that category, it's because they haven't been an inmate long.

Sad but true.

nurseT · Aug 3, 2004

comic sans msredwow....... :eek:

if i work at a hospital and have had an inmate as a pt., if i were interested in writing to him once he is released and he asked me too, could i legally do this.? i have known nurses to marry inmates that were former patients. as long as there is nothing inappropriate while he is a patient, once he is released am i free to write or whatever? please this is very important if anyone knows the "rules" about this situation. i don't understand how this could be a problem. it seems to be the same situation as if a regular patient was to contact a former nurse and pursue a relationship which i have known several nurses who met their husbands as former patients. all opinions aside about "it's a bad idea to get involved with a manipulative inmate" i'm only seeking factual info. thanks alot.

nurseT · Aug 3, 2004

Gee wiz, How do you change font and color?

Corrections RN · Aug 13, 2004

You can if you are not a corrections employee. But, it is a very bad and dangerous thing to do.

nursbaybie, BSN, RN · Aug 19, 2004

I appreciate your advice, however, I resent the remarks regarding the possiblity of me being anything less than the intelligent and compassionate person that I am. I do like to hear how it is on the inside, thus my reason for inquiring on these boards. I do have friends who were in prison before and now are out...FRIENDS, so I also have another side to analyze. As I'm sure many of you know, black men usually are incarcerated for drug distribution and/or theft. To be honest, you don't see too many black sociopaths/serial killers, etc. It is more of a societal issue although not to take the blame off the inmate in any way. I do also have friends/coworkers who tell me "I'm sorry, but I do believe people can change." So, I've had the guy investigated and all he says is true including his 4 year degree and military history, previous employment with a PD involved in busting criminals/sting operations...which he told me how he got involved in crime was by thinking and acting like a criminal to bust criminals and became one in the process, followed by addiction to the money/power/adrenaline associated with that way of life. Now, at this time, I haven't made a decision on what to do. I am open to the possibility that he could be being dishonest in his stated intentions, or he could be sincere, I really don't know and will never know until he is out. Do I want to take the chance and leave my husband and doomed relationship to take a chance on love with this man? I don't know yet because I am aware it is a huge risk. I may or may not take it. It is a big gamble.