Petrified when handling residents that expire...

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I have a huge phobia when it comes to dealing with residents that expire. To be honest when ever I see an expired resident my pulse goes up , I tremble, and the image of their body stays in my mind. Whenever I suspect a resident on hospice has passed I always call an aide in the room when doing postmortum care. However, there was one resident that looked so scary when he passed that I couldn't even touch him. I feel like a terrible nurse and can't wait to get out of geriatrics. I know as a nurse I must see patients die but some of them look so scary and I can't sleep at night. Please help me, get over this phobia.

Specializes in Psychiatry.
I'm just curious, what is "scary" about it? Yes, I realize they are dead and it is sometimes very sad but I just can't see what is scary about it.

To each their own, right??

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Specializes in Mental Health.
I have found talking to them a little, letting them know you are performing one last act of respect, helps a little.

It has been a few years since I have done this so I may be considered out of date now.

I used to talk to them ALOT, telling them what I was doing, as I had done when they were still alive. After all this is most probally the last time you will be giving them any nursing care.

For the open eyes, what we did is to close them using a wet cotton ball(s). BUT make sure the cotton ball(s) is well wrung out, other wise some of the excess water might gather in the eye pits and trickle down the side of the face looking like tears and THAT would be scary.

As for getting 'used' to it. I never did, but I was able to accept that it was part of the process of life.

I would try to make them look 'presentable', as they way they look, after I have done my bit, is the image that will stay with the family for the rest of their lives.

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Before I wanted to be a nurse I started my prereqs for mortuary science and worked for a funeral home doing removals. Some of them were frightening, but I always, always, always treated their body with the utmost care and regard, knowing that in that very moment while I was scared or whatever, there was a family member grieving over the loss. I then took them back to the funeral home and did all the post mortem care that needed to be done there. Believe me at 2 am in a creepy old funeral home, my heart definetly race quite a bit. I then decided that I do not want to be a funeral director...

However, I lost my 30 year old sister to brain cancer and while she was in Hospice, I realized I was meant to be a Hospice nurse. Glad to say that I am im my last semester.

We all have our strenghts /weaknesses... and you know what yours are. As long as you caring and respectful, that's all the family could request!!!!

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clearly, the op's heart is in the right place.

she's a new nurse.

why not cut her some slack?

leslie

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Specializes in Geriatrics, LTC.

One thing that helped me come to grips with this part of nursing is to focus on the fact that this is just a body now - the spirit has moved on and the pain the person was feeling is gone. So, in a way it is actually much easier than caring for someone who has pain with each turn, positon etc. Hope this helps.

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Specializes in LTC/Subacute.

My first one as a nurse was a pt I had known when I was a CNA in a hospital. She was a very skeletal lady and when I was helping hold the ambu bag during the code I was looking straight into her sunken eyes the whole time. All I could think of was the conversations and bantering we had had up to this point. Yeah, it was a bit freaky watching her eyes glaze in front of me but as many have posted I just wanted the most respectful passing for her. Luckily when the emt's arrived i had a quick second to close her eyes and wipe some gunk from her face. Everyone will deal with this situation differently and I hope the OP is able to begin to cope with this. It's part of the job whether ltc or any other specialty. Good luck to you.

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you get use to it, i still talk (always explaining what's going on, whether they're alive or dead) to them while i'm taking care of their bodies after death, never had one answer back yet, ha.

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Specializes in Psychiatry.

I work hospice care.

For me, it's my final chance to pay respect to the deceased and have my own personal closure, especially if I have cared for them over several weeks or months.

I am gentle when I perform post-mortem care, and I always treat them with the same kindness I would if they were still alive.

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Specializes in Med/Surg/Tele/Acute Rehab.

You could just put a folded wash cloth over their eyes. They won't mind.

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You could just put a folded wash cloth over their eyes. They won't mind.

yes...or even tape them closed.

did i tell you guys about the time an employee from a funeral home, came to take away one of my pts.

he was alone, and lifted the corpse over his shoulder!!!!

he had adamantly refused my offers of help.

anyways, when i saw 'mary' tossed over his shoulder, i freaked on him.

WE ended up transporting mary together, and i got his sorry a$$ fired.

freaking idiot.

leslie

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Oh, Leslie! I could tell you some HORROR stories about the mortuary we have in our town.....I want to kill them on a regular basis.....they think they can act that way because they are the only game in town.

To OP: It does get easier as you go. I don't think I will ever 'get used' to it per say, but it doesn't bother me as much as it used to, either.

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Oh, Leslie! I could tell you some HORROR stories about the mortuary we have in our town.....I want to kill them on a regular basis.....they think they can act that way because they are the only game in town.

report them to the bbb, and the atty genl's office.

all states have division of mortuary sciences, but they're worded differently.

the ag's office should guide you accordingly.

they shouldn't get away with that.:mad:

leslie

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