Partner doesn't like that I'm a nurse

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I'm wondering if anyone else has had this issue and my be able to give advice. I'm nearing the end of my nursing education. My partner is a hypochondriac and especially with this COVID outbreak he says I'm selfish to volunteer at local hospitals and that I'm putting him and his son at risk. But I think regardless of a COVID outbreak, I'll always be around potentially infectious patients so, it makes me nervous about the potential our relationship has if he is going to be so upset when I'm around sick patients. I actually cancelled volunteering for now even though I don't want to. Does anyone have experience with this and were you able to make the relationship last?

Specializes in school nurse.

He won't change and the issue won't go away. Get out while the getting is good...

Specializes in Psych/Mental Health.

COVID is a bit different than "typical" infectious diseases we normally see. It's new with many many unknowns. He has legitimate reason to be concerned for his own safety and for his son.

If you choose to volunteer, it's best to maintain your distance from him and honor his concerns and validate his fears.

13 minutes ago, umbdude said:

COVID is a bit different than "typical" infectious diseases we normally see. It's new with many many unknowns. He has legitimate reason to be concerned for his own safety and for his son.

If you choose to volunteer, it's best to maintain your distance from him and honor his concerns and validate his fears.

Thats totally fair. Thank you for your insight, I really appreciate it.

Specializes in Supervisor.
On 3/29/2020 at 5:36 PM, Jedrnurse said:

He won't change and the issue won't go away. Get out while the getting is good...

This. Time to move on. You need a partner that accepts and adapts to you. They must accept the harsh reality that your job is dangerous and inadvertently increases their risk.

I know they are out there. My wife and I are both nurses. We both "get it."

Specializes in ICU/community health/school nursing.

So...it's not going to get any better. We always bring germs home. When I was an ICU nurse I used to strip at the garage door and dump my scrubs in the wash immediately. Even Mr. Ruby Jane, who has an admin position now, routinely washes his scrubs separately. Do your best. But realize if it's not COVID-19 it will likely be something else.

Specializes in ER.
Specializes in Trauma, Teaching.

My knee jerk reaction is, yeah get rid of him.

But why are you with him to begin with? Is he super supportive in the rest of your life? Does he love you so deeply that your happiness is more important to him than anything else (except for his son of course)? Does he meet your emotional needs, and you his? Can you imagine having a good life without him?

Yes, I agree with staying home during the corona virus, from your volunteering; we're all staying home. But in the long run, are you going to be supported through the rough times you'll have as a nurse? If not, then I wouldn't plan a life with him. How has he dealt with nursing school?

Specializes in Med/Surg, LTACH, LTC, Home Health.

Did you recently meet him? Why is the thought of your being a nurse such a problem to him now? Does he not understand that there is no need to pay a nurse to care for a person who is not sick?

My ex-husband developed his problem with my career path once he realized my paycheck was going to be larger than his. He literally told me to go get a job working at the local Family Dollar. A joke, right? To show how serious he was, he divorced me 3 days before I was set to graduate. So I went on to graduate, pass the NCLEX, and got to keep the family dollars right inside my wallet.

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