parent confidentiality

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HI.I am really bothered about this and wandered if anyone has had to go through this situation.You see,my dad is not getting around so well.His feet are swollen to high heaven.He is doing and taking all the right stuff.He sees a family friend,also his doctor.My dad is 73 now.I lost my mother 2 years ago,suddenly.This is when my dad began to have his problem.Anyway,I cant get him to see another doctor.I even called his doctor.The doc said"there is nothing you can do for your dad".He then made it clear,that he would not tell me anything either.He also said,I understand it his hard to stand by helplessly and watch a loved one deteriorate,but there is nothing you can do."This scares me to death.I know what is happening,but I really feel like something else could be done.My dad still has a good mind,he is not suffering.Just seems like he is not intersted in trying to do a whole lot,to fix his problem or find out what it all is.I also feel like he just doesnt want us kids to know.What can I do?Thanks for listening to me babble.:nurse:

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Specializes in Geriatrics.

You can ask your dad to OK it with the Doc for you to see his records. Then the Doc cannot withhold info from you. That way you can judge for yourself if "there's nothing you can do" Good Luck. :heartbeat

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Specializes in LTC, Disease Management, smoking Cessati.
HI.I am really bothered about this and wandered if anyone has had to go through this situation.You see,my dad is not getting around so well.His feet are swollen to high heaven.He is doing and taking all the right stuff.He sees a family friend,also his doctor.My dad is 73 now.I lost my mother 2 years ago,suddenly.This is when my dad began to have his problem.Anyway,I cant get him to see another doctor.I even called his doctor.The doc said"there is nothing you can do for your dad".He then made it clear,that he would not tell me anything either.He also said,I understand it his hard to stand by helplessly and watch a loved one deteriorate,but there is nothing you can do."This scares me to death.I know what is happening,but I really feel like something else could be done.My dad still has a good mind,he is not suffering.Just seems like he is not intersted in trying to do a whole lot,to fix his problem or find out what it all is.I also feel like he just doesnt want us kids to know.What can I do?Thanks for listening to me babble.:nurse:

Cherish every day you have with him and tell him you love him, and let him make the decisions as long as he can. I wish I still could do that for my Dad.

Have a good day! :specs:

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Specializes in CMSRN.

I agree with the previous post. If his mind is good and he does not say anything to you even if you ask, try and respect that.

Hard to do but that is his wishes.

If he is not willing to say anything to you than at least ask what his wishes are so you will know. Find out why. That will help with accepting what you can't control.

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I had access to my Mom's records. She made it clear that all Doctors and nurses were to talk to me, and then I would talk to her. But if it is your Dad's wishes to NOT let you know, you must respect that.

I wish I still had my Momma. I miss her more than anything.

Love your Dad for all he's worth and let him know you are there for him and will always be.

Blessings~

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