"Rooming in" on Mother/Baby - not one size fits all

Specialties Ob/Gyn

Published

When I gave birth to my daughter, I had been up for 48 hours solid. I had PIH and had been vomiting for hours upon hours - and then pushed for three hours until she was born. My husband had been by my side, awake, for the entire time.

I had wonderful Labor/Delivery nurses. They got me through the labor from hell. However, once we got to the PP room, and my beauftiful, wonderfully alert and crying-her-heart-out baby girl was placed with us, the nightmare began. I don't blame the nurses per se, but it was a scary situation. I was NOT alert at all - had a pounding headache, crying at intervals for no real reason (maybe the mag sulfate I'd been given combined with sleep depriation?) I was breastfeeding, so I was frequently trying to put her to the breast, but she was not interested in latching. When the nurse came to check on us, I was crying and told her I was afraid I wasn't doing a good job of caring for my baby, because I felt so exhausted and sick. She told me, "I can sympathize with you, but being that you had a lady partsl birth, and birth is a natural process, it's up to you guys to provide your daughter's care".

I understood what she was saying, and proceeded to hand her over to my husband, who walked with her for an hour or so in the room, and then I slipped into a fitful sleep despite her whimpering. I awakened at 3 am, and saw my husband asleep in the chair with the baby in his lap. I was concerned about the safety of this so I put her back in the bassinet (trailing blood as I got up) and rang for the nurse the one and only time I was there. She was friendly, but said unless I had changed my mind about breastfeeding, the baby had to stay with me.

Needless to say, I had a harrowing night. my Husband tried to help, but he was absolutely exhausted and truthfully handles sleepnessness much worse than I did. I remember pinching myself to try to stay awake so I could comfort the baby.

When the doctor rounded the next morning, I begged to go home. I knew I would get more help at home (because other non-sleep deprived family would be there to help me). He agreed and sent me home.

I'm just wondering what the policy is on this type situation in other institutions. I was breastfeeding, and went on to breastfeed for a long, long time - but honestly, my baby was in jeopardy that first night that she was in our room. Certainly I'm not the only mother who has delivered after days of being awake. I just wondered how other places handle this, or if it's the same.

I wasn't angry with anybody - the situation just really sucked and I wish I could have come up with a better plan.

YES the designer absolutely does deserve a medal for that one!!! :bow::yeah::bow:

Yes- colostrum (the pre-milk fluid) is more difficult to pump- (not unpumpable- but it's definately harder TO pump.) That's the thing though- if baby isn't getting to the breast soon after birth- it makes it more difficult to take to it later- as far as latching on- having energy to eat, etc. it's easiest to start breastfeeding during that hour or so alert period that babies often have right after birth. You also want baby on the breast soon after birth to help prevent jaundice- eating flushes the system so it helps to prevent that, as I'm sure you probably know. Pumping is also far less effective at emptying the breast- so baby is going to be FAR more effective at getting that milk supply established.

Not pushing breastfeeding- just saying that if one has chosen to do it- delaying it (or starting with a bottle) can be detrimental to the breastfeeding relationship and can lead to complications and possibly not being able to get baby to latch properly, issues with jaundice, having to supplement with formula (which some mothers do not want, and which offers alot of additional complications) etc. etc. etc.

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Newborns are also tired after wandering into this world, too and hearing things so much more amplified than when they were inside the uterus. Often their crying is fretful, and a being held, rocking motions, and a pacifier will suffice (unless they're the type who spit that out). Usually first milk (senior moment, can't think of its name) is not pumpable, as its quantity is less than milk later, stimulated by suckling). :yawn:

The most sensitive set-up I've ever seen, was at Kaiser Permanente hospitals' OB units, designed by an architect who deserved a medal for it. First of all, the hallway where visitors came to see new moms, was a covered OUTDOOR one. No cross contamination by visitors, and the whole family could come. It was secure. The babies were placed in "drawers" (literally) after they'd stabilized, which were at the level of most hospital beds, next to mom. When mom got tired, she'd slide the "drawer" through to the 4 bed/"drawer" nursery (which prevented overcrowding nurseries) where a nurse was stationed at all times. It was actually then nearly in the nursing station, in a "pod" arrangement. Some idiot redesigned those hospitals without that, to the detriment of all. The loss of shangri-la.......:(

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Hey Gooey - come have your next baby at my hospital. I don't care if people co-sleep. I just ask them to let me know if they are so that we can do it safely in the hospital beds. Most people welcome that. My babies are safe, my moms are happier, and everybody sleeps better.

It drives me crazy - so many other cultures co-sleep and mom and baby are not separated much at all. And here we expect babies to go straight from warm, yummy, feelgood womb to a plastic box, and be happy about it. :confused:

Awesome! :) I put my foot down in the hospital I delivered in- I coslept with both of mine- in the hospital. Some nurses said 'good for you'- some were crabby about it- but that was something I was't going to compromise on. (Yep- I was one of 'those' patients- but was nice about it.) I even put my foot down with the bath post-birth and the nurses probably wanted to throttle me but it was done in my room. My first I didn't see for at least three hours after he was born- no medical complications with him- they just took their good sweet time doing his bath/assessment etc. and brought him to me a screaming crying mess and we had a hell of a time getting him to latch- he was SOOOO hungry! I wasn't about to do that again- so I didn't have my second out of my sight. Yep- they even did the bath and first assessment in my room. (Bless their hearts- even though they probably wanted to strangle me LOL!) I would take them down for assessments each day at the end after the rest were finished and bring them back. (Gave me a good excuse to get up and walk around- see some other scenery LOL) But yes- by cosleeping like that I definately got ALOT more sleep. I tried a couple times to sleep without them with me and I would just fall asleep and wake right back up in a panic wondering where they were. (No- not a helicopter mom- honest LOL but I did value the cosleeping, skin to skin contact, etc.)

I bet your Moms ADORE you! :yeah:

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Neither hospital I delivered at allowed co-sleeping, either. One did not have a well baby nursery, and the other did not take breastfed babies at night. My baby just wanted to be held, he did not need the breast, but since he was breastfed, he wasn't allowed in the nursery. :rolleyes: I understand they were busy and didn't want to keep bringing him out to feed every 1-2 hours. 1-2 hour stretches of sleep would have been nice, though, instead of NONE. There seemed to be plenty of time for nurses to check on us to make sure we weren't sleeping in the bed while nursing, though. :chuckle Of course, co-sleeping wasn't allowed. I was so happy to get home so we could go to bed and nurse/sleep together. We still do it 15 months later. :D

I just told the nurses that I was going to be feeding/sleeping in the bed and to go ahead and write me up as being non-compliant. ;) I dozed while baby ate- safely propped up on a Boppy with pillows. I am the world's lightest sleeper and if my kids so much as sighed, I was awake. They (the nurses) just loved me I'm sure LOL But I made sure I was very nice about it- it wasn't their policy- but it *was* their rear on the line liability wise. :wink2:

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Specializes in Community, OB, Nursery.

Awww, Equinox, that's kind of you to say. I just find that it helps keep everybody sane. And when people realize that you can do it safely and that their nurse is not going to have a cow about it, we just get through the night better.

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Awww, Equinox, that's kind of you to say. I just find that it helps keep everybody sane. And when people realize that you can do it safely and that their nurse is not going to have a cow about it, we just get through the night better.

Well- you definately have my admiration and lots of thank yous for recognizing how much nicer and more beneficial it is for everyone. :) It definately makes that hospital stay easier to stomach when you aren't having to deal with either tolerating a situation you don't want (being told you have to put your baby in that plastic box) or having to take a stand for what you want and deal with that conflict at a vulnerable time. So applause and huge bunches of thanks to you for it!!! :)

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Specializes in OB.

All the good thoughts aside, the fact remains that especially in small facilities the hospital is not going to pay for enough nurses to have one to staff a well baby nursery. "Rooming -in" to administrators is not in the best interest of the baby or mother, but of the budget.

Babies taken out of mom's room at these facilities are going to be at the nurse's station being watched by various staff while the assigned nurse runs back and forth taking care of her other duties and patients - hardly ideal.

Before you castigate the nurses as lazy, better investigate the staffing situation - I've worked in facilities where I was the only nurse with one aide for pp, newborns AND laboring patients!

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Specializes in Psych, Med/Surg, LTC.

Elvish, I would love to deliver at your hospital!!!

My son was just in the hospital for gastroenteritis. They had a crib, and a pull out recliner in the room for a parent. My kid has never slept in a crib!!! They kept saying no co-sleeping was allowed. I climbed into the crib with him and we slept like that. :chuckle No one said anything about it to me.

I wish more places were co-sleeping friendly... It would really make those early days less exhausting for the breastfeeding mom. It seems sad that a mom should be expected to give up breastfeeding and all of its benefits just so she could get an hour of sleep here and there, when you can just take away pillows and blankets and sleep/feed together safely. (if mom isn't on any heavy meds, of course, and if she was, she wouldn't be breastfeeding right then, anyway.)

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Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

We recently had a near death in the case of a cosleeping mom smothering her baby with a breast. I coslept with my babies, so don't get me wrong; I love it. But we better realize NOT everyone is suited to cosleeping and thank GOD the nurses found this kid in time. I shudder to think if just a few more minutes were to have passed before they found this situation. They had to bag the baby who was BLUE and that close to death. Convinced me allowing everyone to cosleep in the hospital can be very unsafe. We are busy and cannot be there watching every minute to be sure mom and baby are safe, so we have to disallow it. That is why I am really for a responsible adult sleeping the night who can help out. And yes, we will help out watching babies for sleeping moms who have no support/help.

Disallowing cosleeping has become policy for us due to this situation. Sad but it's safest from a safety and legal standpoint.

I was 100% cosleeping in the hospital prior to this. Not anymore. That is why we have to encourage the use of the cribs when mom is exhausted/sleeping.

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I'm all for "encouraging" it in those circumstances... I am, however, against "demanding" it.... :) Patients do have rights- including being non-compliant so long as they accept the risks and consequences of being so :)

We recently had a near death in the case of a cosleeping mom smothering her baby with a breast. I coslept with my babies, so don't get me wrong; I love it. But we better realize NOT everyone is suited to cosleeping and thank GOD the nurses found this kid in time. I shudder to think if just a few more minutes were to have passed before they found this situation. They had to bag the baby who was BLUE and that close to death. Convinced me allowing everyone to cosleep in the hospital can be very unsafe. We are busy and cannot be there watching every minute to be sure mom and baby are safe, so we have to disallow it. That is why I am really for a responsible adult sleeping the night who can help out. And yes, we will help out watching babies for sleeping moms who have no support/help.

Disallowing cosleeping has become policy for us due to this situation. Sad but it's safest from a safety and legal standpoint.

I was 100% cosleeping in the hospital prior to this. Not anymore. That is why we have to encourage the use of the cribs when mom is exhausted/sleeping.

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Specializes in ICU.
We recently had a near death in the case of a cosleeping mom smothering her baby with a breast. I coslept with my babies, so don't get me wrong; I love it. But we better realize NOT everyone is suited to cosleeping and thank GOD the nurses found this kid in time. I shudder to think if just a few more minutes were to have passed before they found this situation. They had to bag the baby who was BLUE and that close to death. Convinced me allowing everyone to cosleep in the hospital can be very unsafe. We are busy and cannot be there watching every minute to be sure mom and baby are safe, so we have to disallow it. That is why I am really for a responsible adult sleeping the night who can help out. And yes, we will help out watching babies for sleeping moms who have no support/help.

Disallowing cosleeping has become policy for us due to this situation. Sad but it's safest from a safety and legal standpoint.

I was 100% cosleeping in the hospital prior to this. Not anymore. That is why we have to encourage the use of the cribs when mom is exhausted/sleeping.

WHat happened? I know that when my babies were little and were asleep with me ( in the cradle of my arm and breast) , I was completely aware of them, even when I was asleep. Did she roll over on the baby? Was her breast so big that the baby was under it? If that is the case, this mother should have known not to handle the baby like that...

It is a mothers intuition to be aware of the baby sleeping next to her, even if she is asleep...

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maybe blue's post goes back to the original.....that mom was toooo tired to be doing it unsupervised.....or perhaps medicated too much.....or was the infant not well to begin with?

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Lamaze, I work in Canada and it's perfectly legal. This was studied extensively and this is what people wanted. They did not want to be separated from their babies so rooming in is the norm here and the only time we have complaints about the fact we have no nursey is when mom wants someone to watch the baby while she smokes. If there is no one available well then they are out of luck on that.

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