Last week, we had delay in schedule due to crazy weather/safety concerns on the road. Because of this, classes were canceled. I emailed my teachers about questions I had with our upcoming midterm - clarifying the chapters, any suggestions, etc... (since we didn't get a chance to talk about it, since classes were canceled). I spoke with a professional and polite tone and was not demanding. It's been almost a week and I haven't gotten any email from them. This one student in our class (who's been dubbed as the "favorite" one;there are rumors he will continue on further in his education because of the "favoritism" he is apparently getting from the teachers) received INDIVIDUAL emails from both teachers. Later, one teacher sent a group email to the class. As for that teacher that didn't email me back - apparently, this student told me he received an individual email (from her) stating that she would email him again when he had the answer. Why didn't I get an email like this from her? I'm upset and kind of annoyed with this. I'm not those obnoxious students who bug their teachers with questions. All I did was ask (nicely) and clarify questions regarding the final. Don't teachers like when students are involved in their education? I understand they are busy with other students and classes (and their families) but why couldn't she send an email back to me but took the time to send one to the "favorite" student? I've had clinical with this instructor before so I know what to do/what not to do. I feel resentful...I know, sounds stupid but I would like to get a response back from my teacher.
OB-nurse2013, BSN, RN 1,229 Posts Specializes in Labor and Delivery. Has 3 years experience. Jan 25, 2012 My best advice is get over it and move on. It's not fair but theres a lot of unfair stuff in nursing school and if you concentrate on it, it will drive you nuts. I had a similar situation in first semester and it bothered me so much. You think, on no adults don't behave like this or I never got treated this way before nursing school but it doesn't matter. My second semester, with new instructors went well and I just got over it because its to consuming to worry about the many injustices. Now in my third semester it seems this still can happen but as a class we're pretty nice so if one person gets something it gets passed along enough that everyone gets it anyhow. Good Luck!!!!
anonymousstudent 559 Posts Jan 25, 2012 Teachers here NEVER respond. Ever. It's pathetic. But I know that, so I don't bother anymore.As far as exams, I know it's a lot of material, but if it was assigned, it's fair game. I look through some of the NCLEX review books if I can't figure out what's most important to guide my study in certain areas. It's always worked out just fine for me. I agree, you just have to move on and let it go. Teachers are still human. Favorite guy probably got the first email in, followed by 50 more, to which they realized they weren't going to have time to reply, so didn't. Who knows.
Jolie, BSN 6,375 Posts Specializes in Maternal - Child Health. Has 37 years experience. Jan 25, 2012 Have you considered the possibility that she either didn't receive your e-mail, or inadvertently overlooked it? I understand your frustration, but don't think it is reasonable to jump to conclusions that you were ignored due to not being a favored student. I check my e-mail regularly and still occasionally miss something. Have you made an effort to speak to her during office hours to politely express your concerns and ask if there is time frame after which you should e-mail a second time, in the future?I think you will find nursing school (and life in general) to be more pleasant if you don't assume that others are against you.
NCRNMDM, ASN, RN 465 Posts Jan 25, 2012 I think you should consider that maybe she didn't see your email, or mistakenly thought she had already replied to you. If she thought that she had already replied and answered your question, then of course she didn't send you an additional email re-answering a question that she already thought had been answered. I understand how frustrating it can seem when you feel as if you are being ignored and others are being favored, but maybe this isn't the case. The idea that one student will go further in his education because he is the, "favorite" is absolutely ridiculous. In order to continue with his education, he has to make passing grades and do well. The instructors can't overlook wrong answers on exams, or pass him when he doesn't deserve a passing grade. If he is doing well, then he is working for it. I make As in my program, all the instructors like me, and they all say that I am going to go far. They've even done me a few favors, but I earn every one of my grades through studying and hard work. That's the reason the instructors like me so much; each staff member in the program knows that I am working hard for my grades, and that I take pride in my work.
BluegrassRN 1,188 Posts Has 14 years experience. Jan 25, 2012 So, one teacher sends out a group email, addressing questions that she probably got from everyone. She's being efficient, addressing multiple concerns and questions. Why would she then send out individual emails to each of her students? As for the other teacher, did you email again? You give her one shot and she's out? How many times does someone have to remind you more than once of something? People forget, overlook, and screw up all the time, without malice. She's not sitting there, looking at your email, rubbing her hands together while she diabolically laughs at how upset she's going to make you when she doesn't respond. She probably just forgot, or thought she sent and email but didn't, or maybe your email was accidentally deleted, didn't even get there for some reason, etc, etc.How about not assuming that everyone is against you? Act like a professional. If someone doesn't provide you with the information you need, contact them again. Don't whine about how they hate you and they are playing favorites, that's junior high. You are in college, entering into a profession where you need to act like an adult. Really, I find it interesting that one instructor doesn't respond, and you jump to some pretty intense conclusions. Why not just advocate for yourself, and contact the instructor again?
allnurses Guide Hygiene Queen 2,232 Posts Jan 26, 2012 Teachers are still human. Favorite guy probably got the first email in, followed by 50 more, to which they realized they weren't going to have time to reply, so didn't. Who knows.That sounds much more reasonable than the "playing favorites" theory.I understand the OP's frustration (we've all endured the unholy "urgent-email-that-never-got-answered", but to think it's because of favoritism is not terribly realistic.OP: don't take it so personally.You just need to manage your end of things the best you can... and not worry about "favorites".I'm thinking you are just really over-taxed, over-tired and really over-sensitive right now.
kids 1 Article; 2,334 Posts Jan 26, 2012 You're basing this off your classmate's claim that he got a personal response from the instructor, what makes you believe he's telling the truth?
chiasmus100 152 Posts Jan 26, 2012 I am a substitute teacher and it is hard not to have favorites. I think it might be because teaching is such a thankless job in general being able to openly show preference is one of the few perks, so long as the preference doesn't interfere with grading. Some kids just are more pleasant than others. I know it sounds bad, but I always find I prefer a few kids to the rest of the students. By that I mean I learn/remember their names and find them less annoying. I don't try to hide it also, because I think that would make it worse.However, what you are describing sounds quite strange and I don't think it makes a lot of sense.
kgh31386, BSN, MSN, RN 815 Posts Has 4 years experience. Jan 26, 2012 What's with the whole dwelling on rumors mess? Think about this, do you know what the kid emailed the teacher about? Is it a crime to have a good relationship with your teachers or bosses? He might have asked some specific questions or something else. If you and 35 of your classmates are all emailing asking the same thing. I'm going to go with the teacher will be efficient and send out a group email when they deem appropriate. My advice....stop worrying about rumors. Your post was full of "rumor this, apparently that". Like others said, be professional. Take this kind of rumor loving attitude into the workplace...you'll feel 10 times worse than you do now.
caliotter3 38,333 Posts Jan 26, 2012 Assuming you were able to determine that it was not an oversight and that your email was indeed received. As others have pointed out, best not to dwell on this slight or perceived slight. Nothing is going to change the fact that the instructor has a favorite or two, if that is indeed the case. Many of us noticed this in our classes and occasionally it was a topic for discussion, but we all knew that there was nothing we could do to change the situation. Good training for the nursing work world, where favoritism can be also be found alive and well.
Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN 4 Articles; 20,908 Posts Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma. Has 43 years experience. Jan 26, 2012 Last week, we had delay in schedule due to crazy weather/safety concerns on the road. Because of this, classes were canceled. I emailed my teachers about questions I had with our upcoming midterm - clarifying the chapters, any suggestions, etc... (since we didn't get a chance to talk about it, since classes were canceled). I spoke with a professional and polite tone and was not demanding. It's been almost a week and I haven't gotten any email from them. This one student in our class (who's been dubbed as the "favorite" one;there are rumors he will continue on further in his education because of the "favoritism" he is apparently getting from the teachers) received INDIVIDUAL emails from both teachers. Later, one teacher sent a group email to the class. As for that teacher that didn't email me back - apparently, this student told me he received an individual email (from her) stating that she would email him again when he had the answer. Why didn't I get an email like this from her? I'm upset and kind of annoyed with this. I'm not those obnoxious students who bug their teachers with questions. All I did was ask (nicely) and clarify questions regarding the final. Don't teachers like when students are involved in their education? I understand they are busy with other students and classes (and their families) but why couldn't she send an email back to me but took the time to send one to the "favorite" student? I've had clinical with this instructor before so I know what to do/what not to do. I feel resentful...I know, sounds stupid but I would like to get a response back from my teacher.I am sorry you are experiencing this in school and feeling bad.:hug: But, I don't think you are going to like what I have to say.First......Life isn't fair. I know this maybe a shock but..... This is not elementary school where "Everybody wins". No where in the college "rule book" does it say that the instructor/professor shall not have favourites. If he has found a way to manipulate the system to make it easier for himself.......good for him. Sounding like a petulant child (I mean that lovingly) "Why didn't I get an e-mail from her":bluecry1: is not the way to win favouritism and influence people in the nursing profession. I think this is where the "everybody wins:cool:" mentality does a disservice to the young people in not learning how to deal with disappointment and develop the skills to pick yourself up brush off the dust and move on. The other thing is that hospitals NEVER close in "bad weather" due to safety concerns and act as shelters and a place to seek warmth and food in those situations. Whining in nursing will not help you and pouting when things don't go your way, will hurt you in the long run. You need to learn to deal with it now becasue it will eat you alive when you graduate and in some instances.... it actually may get worse. (I am sorry I had to be the one to break the news to you about how petty some people are:hug: and that all the crap in high school you hated??? Sadly enough.....continues)The reality is that in MANY instances the nursing profession is nothing more than a mean girl/popular girl mentality and "favouritism" is rampant. Even when graduated there will be "those nurses" who seem to get the better schedules and first vacation picks....no matter what they do wrong or how good you are.......they win. There is nothing you can do about it......even in the corporate worlds there are still those who will sleep their way to the top (or is it to be on top....I get so confused).Second.......You also didn't "speak" in a professional "tone". You "wrote" in a professional "manner". An e-mail or text IS NOT SPEAKING to anyone. I know you think you are not one of "Those" obnoxious people......but maybe your teacher disagrees. It doesn't matter in the big scheme of things because your teacher can pretty much do as she pleases. Maybe however you are being over sensitive to a blown out of proportion situation by the "teachers pet" who may be a braggart and a pathological liar. "Oh honey I'm sorry....they e-mailed me personally...." Really? Did you re-send the e-mail? Did you send it so you would be notified the moment the teacher opened the mail and sent you a receipt? Did you send it priority so it would stand out amongst the many, many student e-mailing her at the same time? Did you consider it got lost amongst the shuffle or maybe wasn't delivered, or she lost power and didn't recieve it?Take control of your own destiny. Take control of your surroundings. Like what I have quoted at the bottom....No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.Good Luck:loveya:
