Nursing school is killing me

guest07/14/15 · May 3, 2015

Hello Mary. I am sorry that you are feeling this way. Nursing school is difficult and at times I know that my morals were down. One way I combatted this was by focusing on positive thoughts and I kept reminding myself of why I was in nursing school. I also made a short term vision board with my three year goals. One of those goals is to graduate in December 2016. Looking at my vision board has helped me to stay focused even more.

2cooldeans · May 3, 2015

Do you have someone you can talk to? What is your support system? Have you shared this with your doctor? Is there anything you really enjoy that you could spend a little time doing ?

Remember to live just in the moment. When we think of everything at once it overwhelms us. So day by day hour by hour if need be. Try motivational short guided meditations on you tube. They helped me.

Focus on your accomplishments. To be where you are today is huge!!! Be proud! Even if you have a crappy day find something to feel grateful for.

Individuals can be horrible. Don't give them emotional power over you. Learn what you need from them and forget about them after that.

Christinajoannne · May 3, 2015

I am very sorry you feel this way. It seems you are feeling extremely frustrated, discouraged, and just down in general.

Nursing school is hard. Don't forget that. We have one of the hardest majors ever, compared to our other non-nursing colleagues. All my teachers remind us that.

How do we deal with this huge thing called our future career? Absorb yourself with goals and things that make you happy. What makes you keep going on? For me, I want to go into a certain field of nursing (multiple things, like passing the NCLEX, and then getting hired to med surgical, to go cardiac ICU, and then going to cardiac cath/or I might go an LD route, still haven't decided! We still have many opportunities in nursing). I keep reminding myself, just a "little more." "You can do it. You are smart. You are doing so many good things for so many people. And soon, you'll be happy, and things will be easier. Just one step at a time."

And what I want you to know is one vital thing: You ARE A STUDENT. Never forget that. When I was younger, I was incredibly hard on myself "How come they can do it? How come it's so hard for me to get this?" After that, I started beating myself up, and I was just low in energy and confidence. After, coming full circle, I decided to simply "Do my best." My best was all I can give. And you know what? I did 100 percent better. Now, I just focus on becoming better. If I make a mistake? Try again next time. I'm a student. I'm prone to make mistakes. That is what our teachers are here for. They know you're a student as well. It's better to make mistakes now and learn as much as you can now, rather when you are with your preceptor, and they're thinking "How does this person has a license?"

You're a student. You can get this. Whether it be now, or later. You will gain that skill. You will remember that theory. You will be a great nurse. Give your best and you won't have any regrets. Keep your eyes on the prize, okay?

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · May 3, 2015

Nursing school is hard. Don't forget that. We have one of the hardest majors ever, compared to our other non-nursing colleagues. All my teachers remind us that.

I respectfully beg to differ...

Although nursing school entails plenty of busy-work, it is not necessarily the hardest college major by a long shot. I just become mildly irritated when nursing is placed on an undeserved pedestal for its questionable level of difficulty.

If masses of people with very average intelligence levels can become nurses, this is testament to the reality that nursing is not one of the hardest majors ever.

Christinajoannne · May 3, 2015

I respectfully beg to differ...
Although nursing school entails plenty of busy-work, it is not necessarily the hardest college major by a long shot. I just become mildly irritated when nursing is placed on an undeserved pedestal for its questionable level of difficulty.
If masses of people with very average intelligence levels can become nurses, this is testament to the reality that nursing is not one of the hardest majors ever.

It's a completely subjective thing, and I respect your opinion. :)

I didn't say it was "THE" hardest. I can think of some other majors that are very difficult such as Engineering. I simply said it was "One of the" hardest, when you take in consideration how much we know.

I still hold by my statement, as well as my instructors.

NurseGirl525, ASN, RN · May 3, 2015

I kind of know your feeling. I have been extremely stressed out the past couple of weeks. I think everyone in burned out right now. The other students in my program can drive me crazy sometimes, but I am sure I do the same to them. You need to put things in perspective and hopefully you are towards the end of your semester. My mom even said to me I sound depressed right now, and my dad says I always sound tired which I am.

I slept for 15 hours between yesterday and today. I hadn't seen my boyfriend in a while and spent the weekend with him. I fell asleep at 5:30 yesterday and didn't wake up until this morning. I felt terrible about it and felt like I missed quality time with my boyfriend. He said you wouldn't have slept that long if you didn't need the sleep. I realized he was right. I feel pretty refreshed today. I'm going to do some stuff for me outside my house today and start studying for finals tomorrow.

Take some time for you to get yourself together and get energized again. Whether it's some quiet time with a book, some exercise, or sleep, take care of yourself. You won't make it through nursing school if you don't. When we are tired and burned out, our attitude stinks and that projects onto others. I'm ready to tackle my finals now. Hopefully you can get yourself back together. Good Luck!!

HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD · May 4, 2015

How's your physical health? The effects of cumulative sleep deprivation and poor nutrition can just sneak up on you. If you couple this with chronic stress.... it can be a real train wreck.

We all have slumps. Life is a series of peaks and valleys. As we gain experience in recovering from the low spots, we become more resilient... realizing that "this too shall pass". Corny, I know but that's the way it is. They key is to just keep putting one foot in front of the other - don't be tempted into permanent decisions to solve temporary issues.

We're here for you.

GuEsT78 · May 4, 2015

You're on the dean's list and yet feel that your clinical instructors are being too hard on you. That's a most interesting situation and one in need of more explanation. I'm good at objectivity, so that's what I will do. Answers include:

Top students are often very hard on themselves, imagining failure when they're actually doing quite well. It's part of what a recent book (by that name) calls The Triple Package. The three are:

1. A sense of calling or being chosen, i.e. such as to be a nurse.

2. A strong sense of failure. You've described that.

3. An great ability to exercise self-discipline and differ gratification for long-term goals. Making the Dean's List illustrates that.

The book notes that while the three items in the package make for success in life, the first and second, calling versus failing, clash in ways that can leave people feeling conflicted and miserable.

That maybe what you're feeling. You may need to learn to manage that conflict.

I know that when I worked on the Hem-Onc unit at a major children's hospital I had that conflict. At one and the same time I felt that I belonged in precisely that spot and I was all too aware that one mistake could mean a child might die. That's items one and two in the package. I resolved the two by applying the third, doing everything in my power to give those kids top-notch care. I never relented in my drive to do my best no matter how sleepy I felt on night shift.

Teachers can be very hard on top students. They see your grades and raise their expectations for your performance and the demands they place on you. if that is the situation, you might want to talk with them and make clear to them that their high expectations are doing more harm than good. Almost everyone who teaches wants to teach well, but they need your feedback.

Sometimes the academic is different from the clinical. My second quarter of college chemistry was a mess for myself and all the students I was taking it with. One day, I got to talking with the guy next to me and we discovered that he had an A average in the lab but was failing the class while I was the opposite. The reason wasn't that hard to figure out.

* They'd changed the chemistry book to one that had a totally different perspective (more quantum mechanics). That made it hard for those like that other guy who couldn't shift their abstract thinking quickly.

* At the same time their labs were dreadful, expecting students to do complicated procedures without understanding why. A friend who majored in chemical engineering told me that he was a senior before he understood what he was doing in his freshman labs. Those who can follow steps without grasping the why were doing well. Those who were like me weren't.

If you really are having trouble adjusting from the academic to the clinical, you might want to explore why that's true. Perhaps you're being asked to do things by rote memory when you really needed to understand the underlying why. If that's you, then it may mean your take longer to learn the clinical but when you learn it you know it better. That's nothing to fret about.

One final suggestion. My nephew is a Navy doctor who for a time ran a clinic for Navy Seals near San Diego. The Navy has done studies in effort to understand why 25% of those tested pass the brutal Seal testing and 75% fail. One key factor is their attitude. Those who fail obsessed over all they have to endure during that Hell Week. That overwhelms them and they drop out. Those who succeed, think differently. They break down the testing they're enduring into manageable bites. They forget about Hell Week, and, on a twenty-mile run, focus on getting the the top of the next hill. When they get there, they focus on getting to the bottom of the hill. Bit by bit, they survive that testing.

You seem to be focused on the long journey you will face through nursing school. Perhaps you'd be less stressed if you picked more manageable goals like doing well on the next test and letting the more distant future, like the past, not draw so much or your attention.

I know that's how I handled the stresses of Hem-Onc. I didn't try to imagine months of giving demanding care for very sick kids with the ever present risk of a mistake meaning a child died. Instead, I focused each night on doing the best I could that night. When day shift arrived, with all my kids stable, I congratulated myself for a job well done. I went home and, within about three minutes of lying down was sound asleep. The next night I did the same thing.

In short, focus on doing well in little chunks. Don't focus on "nursing school." Focus on the next homework assignment, the next test and the next lab or clinical. Do that and "nursing school" will take care of itself. Graduation will come. Get there one step at a time.

That's precisely what Jesus taught in Matthew 6:34 when he said: "So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

--Michael W. Perry

ScientistSalarian · May 5, 2015

YOU'RE FINE.

Seriously, relax. It's going to be okay. Clinicals can (and will!) make you feel like the worst wannabe-nurse that ever dared walk the earth but I promise you it will get better.

You've got this!! Just keep going :)

dinah77, ADN · May 5, 2015

Hello, I only have two more years left until my BSN diploma.
It's just...ugh...nursing school is distressing me. All of a sudden, I felt like I wanted to be alone all the time and I've lost energy just to do everything. My self-esteem is extremely low, and clinical instructors being too harsh on me just give extra blows on the littlest self-confidence I could have. I have a clinical instructor right now who I feel is too harsh on me but kinder to my colleagues. I don't know what's up with her, and every encounter with her I palpitate and feel terrible.
All of a sudden I am irritated of people around me and how annoying they can be. And I'm losing my patience.
I don't know. I'm currently on the dean's list for last semester, which I don't really like because professors tend to put extra pressure on us and you know that extra blow when you fail people and teachers.
I don't feel like I can carry on with any task. I feel like a terrible nurse, student, person overall.
How do I deal with this?

Mary, this are red flags to me that you may be suffering from depression

Please go see a counselor.

Your school may have one that you can see on campus free of charge for some initial diagnosis and guidance.

Please take care of yourself.

Hollyhocks720, MSN, NP · May 18, 2015

I agree that what makes nursing school,difficult is the volume and pace of the material, and the unsubstantiated belief by many instructors that they are required to be jerks to students. They make it difficult for the wrong reasons. I have little respect for nursing instructors so far in my program. And all the dean ever talks about is profits and staying in business. These are common themes, I believe the entire system is broken. When composing notes with friends in programs several states away...the theme is the same. I believe one problem is that nursing programs use nurses to teach. Teaching is a separate profession and nursing programs need to invest in some really good teachers.