Nursing School (how Do You Play The Game)

[kristiern]

I am desperately trying to figure out my clinical instructor. I was called into the deans office for a "tiff" with another student. This student smarted off to me and I replied that I was not her mamma and that she was not going to talk to me in that manner. This student was not even talked to. They said they didn't feel the need, and they felt I was confrontational. They told me that I am frightening and intimidating. I asked how and they couldn't give me an answer other than that I talk loud. I asked if it was because I am 6 ft tall and heavyset? They said it had nothing to do with it and that I made the other students feel frightened of me. I just don't get it. Until this incident nobody has even remotely showed signs of being scared of me, to the contrary, I am sort of the one everybody comes to to ask questions. My clinical performance has been wonderful by their standards. They couldn't critique me on my grades, attendance, clinical performance or anything. They told me that maybe I should just learn how to talk quiet and be less scary. I don't understand. My mother has been a nurse for 30 years and I have letters of recommendation from numberous past professors, doctors and nurses that I have worked with in the past stating what a good person I am, and how freely I give of my time to others.

I feel like I am in a game and if I only had the directions I could finish it. I know I cannot win a popularity contest. I am not a smoocher of the instructor's behinds, and I won't do that.

Is there an avenue I have to help with this situation, or can they honestly kick me out of school because they are intimidated by me? I don't know what to do. I am still in school now, but I don't know for how long. This was geared as a personal attack not to try and help me. If they could have told me to chop myself off at the knees and loose 50 pounds and gotten away with it they would have. I have a wonderful repoir with my patients, this one girl I was assigned to hadn't let anybody touch her since she came into the hospital,(3 days) but she let me turn her and do a physical examination of her decubitus on her bottom.

God somebody please help me. I confided in 2 of my classmates who stated that they were crazy. I am starting to doubt myself as a person.

:cry::cry:

[Batman24]

I worry about some of these very same things. I am doing pre-reqs now and I'm 37. The wait list is a few years so chances are I will be 40 when I actually start school. I might be older than the instructor and most of the class. I just pray I get a compassionate and great instructor.

I also worry because I have been in the business field for a while and I fear that will be frowned upon by some. I am certified in employment law, but I plan on keeping all of this to myself. The less they know the less they can use against you. lol

[allthingsbright]

Ugh, this is exactly why I hated nursing school.

(((HUGS))) Not much advice except that unfortunately, many of us had to play the game to get through. Unfair but true! Take care!!!

[WindyhillBSN]

so glad you posted this....as everyone probably knows already, i hate :angryfirenursing school. keep posting, we need to support each other!

expected graduation date may 2008!

[caliotter3]

There is probably not much solace in knowing that nursing school everywhere is usually like this. Like you've been advised: smile and nod, smile and nod, yes ma'm, yes sir, thank you for the constructive criticism, etc., etc. Do it up until the last day of school. When necessary. Otherwise, learn to adopt a low profile. Say little. Contribute only when you have to. Do what you have to do and don't get involved any further. Stop telling anyone else that you were criticized. Don't give an eight ball a reason to target you. Don't respond to slights. Learn now to let things roll off your back. Think of it like this: You are only there to do assignments, pass tests, perform in clinical, and that is it. Nothing more. Nothing less. At this point, you have already been discussed, so it is pointless to try to learn suck up skills. Just low profile it for the duration. Remember, you can always come here to vent.

[EmmaG, RN]

I'm a second-career nurse who worked successfully as a professional for 20+ years when I was called to be an RN. My maturity and professionalism almost oozed from my skin. I was written up for 'acting too confident' and seeming arrogant . I just listened during the meeting and thanked them for pointing our my deficiencies, knowing all along my instructors were intimidated by me.

More likely they were angry and frustrated that they couldn't intimidate you.