Nursing Hostility and Other Nonsense

In my short career as a nurse I've seen some terrible behavior among nurses, and I'd like to share my take on things. I've only been a year for two years, and working as a nurse for 13 but in that short amount of time, I've seen an astounding amount of hostility between my coworkers and directed at me in the two facilities I worked at. It made me sad, it burned me out and it made me feel like I was working in a mine field. Nurses Announcements Archive Article

You are reading page 4 of Nursing Hostility and Other Nonsense

  1. I encounter hostility from my colleagues:

    • 37
      Very often.
    • 39
      Often.
    • 58
      Occasionally.
    • 53
      Seldom
    • 16
      Never

179 members have participated

rntravlon

31 Posts

This kind of behavior has been around for the past 40 years I have been in nursing. I refuse to participate in that kind of behavior of gossiping,belittling co-workers or new staff to make themselves look better. If people have a problem with that - it is exactly that , their problem not mine. I went in to nursing to care for people , granted it is nice when this type of behavior isn't around.

djh123

1,101 Posts

Specializes in LTC, Rehab.

I don't agree with the 'it happens in all fields' and 'we need to develop thicker skins' comments. I worked in another field for 25 years, in numerous different jobs, and I rarely experienced the kind of mean/angry/quick-to-jump-on-people stuff that I've heard about a lot in nursing. In fact, this is - by far - *THE* most surprising thing to me about this field. I always thought nurses were nice, and they certainly were to me as a patient. As the original poster is saying, we all worked hard to get here, and I would add that this is a stressful/demanding field, so I'd think people would work WELL together, and lean on each other, rather than be snippy and take their frustrations out on each other. I guess somewhat parodoxically, because I'm a nice person and not quick to anger, these other types anger the hell out of me - I feel like saying 'what in the hell is wrong with you?'. Then again, I must admit that I feel like I understand few people these days.

plumbtrician

46 Posts

I think that you must have a thick skin to some degree in order to do nursing in the hospital, but my goal is set a good example by maintaining a positive attitude and when confronted with hostility to push back. What I mean by "pushing back" is to figure out how to disarm the attacker and ensure that this type of behavior is not acceptable. This may be difficult to accomplish.

vld123

24 Posts

Excellent advice-no matter what your occupation.

Thanks for reminding me of the importance of patience, love, and tolerance for our fellow humans-be they patients, co-workers, or the strangers we interact with in our daily commute.

vld123

24 Posts

Its not cheesy-its Truth.

RURN2O11

39 Posts

Specializes in PCU/Telemetry.

I have been lucky to work w/ some really awesome nurses, nursing assistants, & doctors in my career & have very rarely (if ever) encountered true hostility in the workplace. I have at times encountered staff members who were somewhat rude or disrespectful. In the moment I might "take offense" but I am a non-confrontational person so unless someone is truly out of line I usually let it slide. As the original poster stated, 99% of the time mean looks, "avoidance" (not saying hi), or a curt response are just due to stress, fatigue, or a combination of both, & I know I am as guilty of these things at times as anyone else. It is so easy to judge our coworkers but we all need to take a step back & remember we are in this together TO CARE FOR PATIENTS! I have found that the more I forgive others, the more those same people forgive me. And the more I go out of my way to help others, the more they do the same for me. There will always be a few people who are less than friendly or who do not have the same team spirit, but as long as the majority of people on the unit are positive & work together well that spirit will rule the unit. As for gossip, I think if the charge nurses & other "leaders" on the unit demonstrate by example that this is unacceptable behavior, the trend will never even begin. At both facilities I've worked at, gossip has never been a real issue b/c the charge nurses, preceptors, & other experienced nurses have never "allowed" it to happen b/c they have never participated in it or started it. However, I have never worked at a facility w/ residents or medical students (or not enough to matter) so I know that does change the atmosphere a great deal.

Overall I think nurses just need to remember why we are here & that is to care for patients in the best work environment possible for everyone involved. We all want to be respected by our coworkers whether they be doctors or other nurses & the best way to accomplish that is to show respect to each & every person you meet. Pettiness, gossip, & passive-aggressive behavior must not be tolerated or else nurses & pts alike will suffer.

psullivan95

31 Posts

One of the benefits of working in home health is you don't spend a great amount of time around your coworkers, so there's not too much opportunity to get on each others' nerves. I also happen to work with an awesome group of nurses, who are genuinely nice people.

Agreed. I do peds private duty and there isn't much interaction between coworkers except the nurse before and the nurse after you. Also, even though these children are medically intense and keep you on your feet for the entire shift, it is still more laid back than working on a floor in a facility. Besides, we ALL understand how hectic it can be with ONE child so we all cover for each other in terms of emptying the trash or washing/emptying equipment. There is a general feeling of "I know you have been on your feet for 8 hours with no break at all so go home, I got this". I have come across a nurse who refuses to do this so I just stay later to get it all done rather than argue.

lorirn58

74 Posts

SMH at the 'growing a thicker skin' comment. Why would you kick someone who has already been put down? That is just doubly abusive. It is the ABUSE and HOSTILITY toward other people that needs to go away. Have you never been taught or shown how to treat another human being??? SMH...

BrandonLPN, LPN

3,358 Posts

SMH at the 'growing a thicker skin' comment. Why would you kick someone who has already been put down? That is just doubly abusive. It is the ABUSE and HOSTILITY toward other people that needs to go away. Have you never been taught or shown how to treat another human being??? SMH...

Changing and controling how you respond (or don't respond) to the hostility of others is important. Growing a thicker skin might very well be a part of that.

Specializes in Geriatrics, Home Health.
2. Going to our unions and include a professional code of conduct in our contract. (That would put the responsibility on the Human Resources department to do what they are experts in.)

Unions are only concerned about protecting workers from harassment by management; they couldn't care less if you're being harassed by a fellow worker.

My mother retired from Amtrak, which had a major sexual harassment problem. Whenever management tried to intervene, the union screamed that they were oppressing union members. The union refused to intervene because they don't intervene in conflicts between workers.

Have you ever seen the movie North Country about a landmark sexual harassment case? It's based on a true story that happened at a union mine.

OCNRN63, RN

5,978 Posts

Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
The meanness, the back-stabbing, the rudeness-----its not just in nursing.

I was an early childhood education teacher before I left that field to go into nursing. Oh, do I have stories for you guys! You see, when you work around WOMEN, that's how it is. I have been victimized by these predator-like women when I was a teacher. They were back-biting, disrespectful, rude, catty and just plain mean. When I went to nursing school I was told by my nursing instructor that nurses eat their young. My nursing instructors also told me that they will not give me a reference for me to work in a hospital or nursing home. They must have sensed something in my personality because they said a doctor's office or clinic would be a good fit. I refuse to work in a hospital. I would rather do home care nursing where it's just me and the patient and the only people I answer to are the families. I am through trying to be liked and accepted by FEMALES in the workplace. That attitude I had is exactly why I suffered as a teacher-----trying to be liked-----but NO MORE.

I think most women in general are catty and cruel to each other. Not all but MOST of them in the workplace are like that. That's why when I get my nursing job, I will keep to myself. I am not, I refuse, to go out of my way to befriend any nurse or any other WOMAN in the workplace. Women fought hard to get good jobs and good pay and look at how they act. All they want to do is destroy each other. They rarely want to uplift each other. They rarely want to build each other up. They just want to hurt each other. They enjoy that. It is not just the nursing profession----it is any profession dominated by WOMEN. Ick! People may be offended by reading my blog. Too bad. I won't even tell you about the female bosses I had to deal with. Female bosses are worse than male bosses. Trust me. I am just going to say this: I will be nasty to anyone that is nasty to me. All the days of me being sweet to people who are nasty to me and hurting me are over, those days are gone. I am not going out of my way to befriend ANYONE. Especially if the person is a woman. I will keep to myself and try not to smile at anyone. It is what it is folks. I am just trying to survive in my new profession.

Exactly what about your attitude reflects a mature professional who will build up his colleagues, not tear them down?

You'll probably accuse me of being another nasty female nurse, but I am confident that your problems relating to women has more to do with you than those "catty, cruel nurses." Your career plan has you headed for destruction.

OCNRN63, RN

5,978 Posts

Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.

I read a post the other day from a new nurse who was talking about her co-workers (I believe her complaint was that everyone was older than her). She said, and I'm paraphrasing, "They're nice so far, but you never know. Nurses eat their young..." She went on to say that she was expecting them to turn on her.

So, as an experienced nurse, you can't win. If you're a "Crusty old bat" you're eating your young. If you're kind and supportive, you're still harboring that Jaws-like urge to devour every new nurse who comes into your path.