I was just wondering if there are any other nurses who struggle with mental illness. It seems to be one disability that is met with little tolerance and support in the medical field. I do have major co-morbid mental illness, Major depression/PTSD/DID, and have had many problems in my career. I have been in therapy and on meds for a long time and have worked very hard to be functional, and I have suprised myself by what I have been able to achieve. Currently, I am a hospice nurse in a residential setting and it seems that I have found my niche. It doesn't aggravate my illness too much. I am very busy at times and most of my job revolves in much cognitive thinking and decision making about the best ways to respond to a patient's emerging or existing symptoms, and in assessing patients to see where they are in the dying process, plus lots of educating to patients and families. My extensive personal trauma background has made me able to have a different perspective on death and don't see it as the scary thing that is SO SAD, that a lot of people do. Plus, because of the things that I have been through, I am more able to be compassionate and understanding of patients and their fears. I especially do well with patients with existing mental illness or lots of anxiety. I notice that a lot of nurses have little tolerance for a patients anxiety and are not willing to take the extra time to walk them through things and provide the extra reassurance that they need.
Yes, there are some nursing jobs that I don't think I would be able to do because of the fast on the spot life and death action necessary. ER and Trauma/Burn are pretty much out for me. But thats OK. A lot of nurses couldn't handle doing what I do either for their own reasons. We are all suited to certain things.
Having mental illness doesn't automatically make you unsuited for the nursing profession. Even though I have heard many times, "what are you doing here?" "Shouldn't you be doing something else, less stressful?"
I am here and am doing the thing I am suited for. Yes sometimes I have to take time off due to my illness, but its no different than somone who has flare ups of a chronic physical illness like lupus, chronic fatigue, or fibromyalgia.
I would like to know how other nurses have coped with their own illness and their nursing careers.
Specializes in Acute respiratory, med/surg, geriatrics.
I have schizoid personality disorder. PD aren't talked about much in nursing, and I believe, in general (and also concluded from having read this entire thread), most of the mental health issues within nursing revolve around mood and anxiety disorders.
I find that the nurses who are in it for a lifetime carrer are the most prone to aniexty and mood disorders. The folks who are in nursing as a start with ideas of getting out early are more of the happy go lucky type nurses. Also in my observation the nurses who strive to excell, as in certifications and career ladders climbers are the ones who get strained. its almost like the most you care and give the worse off you are mentally. Those who just do what they need to get by seem to do better. Also if your not in the right unit clique sometimes regardless of how much you do, you will still get no where. I am also a firm beleiver that you separate your social gathering from your work gatherings. After all my years I have seen you are better off not socializing with your co-workers. Which also will effect your woking situation. if you take nursing as aLIFE and not career you asking for trouble in the long run. God, Family, then career. Always consider your life balance. just advice
I will admit that I have Bipolar type I disorder. I could care less about the stigma because 1. I am a darn good nurse & 2. It was such a relief to finally have my illness diagnosed. I am an advocate for mental health recognization & treatment especially since 3 of my family members committed suicide (2 of them, my grandparents, of a murder- suicide when my mother was a child). I have been a victim of domestic violence for 10 years & on 08/15/2010 I said enough, took my children, loaded my truck & drove over 600 miles to my mother's house. That in itself, along with receiving a diagnosis, beginnning treatment, & becoming active in church has helped me out a lot. As far as being a nurse with mental illness, heck that coupled with the emotional, physical, verbal, & financial abuse/control my job was my therapy. No matter how rough my day/night was at work, it was nothing compared to the hell I endured at home. My children & I are safe, mommy has more happy days, & my husband, who would make me work 2-3 jobs to support his lifestyle is 600+ miles away & refuses to communicate with me. I couldn't be happier. I hope all the best for all of you.
Specializes in Geriatrics/Orthopedics/CDU/LTC/SNF.
I have been an LPN for a year now. I've never been diagnosed with a mental illness; however, I know there is something wrong with me. I'm one of the most 'normal' in my family so I've never felt the need to get help with my issues up until now.
"What is normal anyway--right!!!"
I come from a severely paranoid schizophrenic mother; as well, my sister has the same diagnosis. My grandfather, aunt, uncle as well as cousins have mental illnesses; such as: anxiety, depression, hoarding, bipolar, etc. I have anxiety, obsessive tendencies and problems focusing and organizing my time and staying on task. My mind wonders, I have to read things out-loud or I won't be able to comprehend what I read. I have to talk out-loud and write everything down on my 'brains-sheet' to even get through my day. I have to stand sometimes when I work cause I get too antsy when doing my paperwork. My mind feels like it's moving too fast and I just can't stay focused.
I've been on-call at work since I started and have worked quite a-bit considering. I recently accepted a scheduled position - I am terrified. I start Thursday.
:nuke:
I'm regretting accepting this position--I want to back-out and stay on-call. I always said 'yes' when they asked; however, I like the control of being able to say 'yes' or 'no' about working. Now I will have a set schedule and I feel so anxious about it.
I want to be happy with being a nurse, I don't want to feel anxious about it. I feel it would be best for me to stay on-call. I shouldn't have accepted the day position--I have regrets. My husband, I feel would prefer me be on a set schedule for guaranteed hours--now I feel anxious about THAT!
When growing up, I always was always in 'special' classes for slow kids. Such classes/attention my son was in when he was younger. My son now 16 was 'diagnosed' with ADHD when he was in kindergarten. I was watching Good Morning America the other day, they were talking about Adult ADD--a light bulb when on. I don't know if that is what I have, but the program made me wake-up to the idea. Hmmmm I thought.
Life in nursing school was hard, exams were the worse; NCLEX was a NIGHTMARE!!! I finally had to take meds on my third try--finally passed!
I have a lot of passion for mental illness and those who live with it everyday. I want to learn more about it. I want to learn more about my own. I need to.
I could write a book on my life from my growing up years to now -- that could be a therapy in itself!
Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
Wow, there are a lot of posts on this thread that I missed!
Hope you guys are doing ok, getting well instead of getting by :) This is a rough time of year for me quite often, but I thank God I haven't had to be hospitalized for 5 years now! yippee!! Am not working at the moment but it is due to spastic torticollis for which I am awaiting treatment. PAIN is not fun - it has aggravated my depression I think.
Keep checking in, I don't always get the notices that someone has posted, but I find that just writing out what's going on helps me. And sometimes it helps someone else!
I've had Bipolar II since I was 12 years old and I became a paramedic and then a nurse. Mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of and as long as you know your limitations and stick with your treatment you can make it in the medical field. That being said sometimes your limitations can be very frustrating. I cannot work night shift. It's not that I choose not to it's that I physically cannot do it and in this field when you're new that's where they want to stick you. I started a new job and stupidly tried to work the 3p-3a shift I was assigned to rather than ask for accommodations. I told myself well you don't really know that you can't adjust to the night shift and besides 3p-3a isn't actually ALL night and within a week I was going out of my mind. I had to go a speak with management (while I was an emotional train wreck) and told them that I was really sorry but I have bipolar disorder and if I can't work during the day I will have to quit because the night shift was making me sick. It was a huge blow to my pride but you know what? They worked with me and found me a spot during the day because I'm good at what I do and I was honest with them. As a new nurse it's been especially hard not being able to take night shifts because jobs in this economy are scarce and beggars can't be choosers but I eventually found work, it just took A LOT longer than I would have liked.
Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
I've had Bipolar II since I was 12 years old and I became a paramedic and then a nurse. Mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of and as long as you know your limitations and stick with your treatment you can make it in the medical field. That being said sometimes your limitations can be very frustrating. I cannot work night shift. It's not that I choose not to it's that I physically cannot do it and in this field when you're new that's where they want to stick you. I started a new job and stupidly tried to work the 3p-3a shift I was assigned to rather than ask for accommodations. I told myself well you don't really know that you can't adjust to the night shift and besides 3p-3a isn't actually ALL night and within a week I was going out of my mind. I had to go a speak with management (while I was an emotional train wreck) and told them that I was really sorry but I have bipolar disorder and if I can't work during the day I will have to quit because the night shift was making me sick. It was a huge blow to my pride but you know what? They worked with me and found me a spot during the day because I'm good at what I do and I was honest with them. As a new nurse it's been especially hard not being able to take night shifts because jobs in this economy are scarce and beggars can't be choosers but I eventually found work, it just took A LOT longer than I would have liked.
Thanks! that is good to hear and you are a great power of example. We sure can't FAKE it ... after a while it does come up to bite our butts!
hey spedtacular great to hear you are working with a group that understands you and is willing to work with you on your problem. consider yourself one of the lucky few. also you're still young. don't share these problems and situations when you're older or if you ever move on to another hospital. i have never been dx with mental health problem other then that problem was that the hell hole i worked was so against my nursing ideas, and i ended up on lexapro. now i am in a much better working environment, but it's not easy getting off this stuff. i am sure i must have some form of mental illness, either the reason i had the desire to become a nurse or the fact i have stayed so long in this profession...must account for something not right. i had worked with some really sick nurses in my past some busted for drugs, some working while on (rx) drugs, some that should have been on drugs working. each and every one of then including a few who have passed on by their own doings. loved nursing and taking care of people, it was more of them not being able to deal with the office politics or unit politics. i hate when i see a nurse go down and out and leave the profession, and they say. "well nursing is not for everybody". with the way medical care has become such a profit driven system, many have left or really want to leave but feel trapped and no longer enjoy their job just have to tolerate it. as for me i am also one of the lucky ones. i have returned to my comfort level in my career, and see a light at the end of the tunnel which flashes only five years to retirement". but my prior 3 years working in the system was a dark never ending road that was leading me to a real scary place, with no end in sight., so i guess to shorten this up. if your in the wrong place medication and therapy will not cure the situation, and don't always think the problem is your to own. just because you fail or don't make it in a unit does not mean that you're a bad nurse, it may just be a bad fit. just hold your head up with pride and move on. sometimes the hand of fate will close the doors to your intentions and place you where you belong. trust me on this!!!
hey spedtacular great to hear you are working with a group that understands you and is willing to work with you on your problem. consider yourself one of the lucky few. also you're still young. don't share these problems and situations when you're older or if you ever move on to another hospital. i have never been dx with mental health problem other then that problem was that the hell hole i worked was so against my nursing ideas, and i ended up on lexapro. now i am in a much better working environment, but it's not easy getting off this stuff. i am sure i must have some form of mental illness, either the reason i had the desire to become a nurse or the fact i have stayed so long in this profession...must account for something not right. i had worked with some really sick nurses in my past some busted for drugs, some working while on (rx) drugs, some that should have been on drugs working. each and every one of then including a few who have passed on by their own doings. loved nursing and taking care of people, it was more of them not being able to deal with the office politics or unit politics. i hate when i see a nurse go down and out and leave the profession, and they say. "well nursing is not for everybody". with the way medical care has become such a profit driven system, many have left or really want to leave but feel trapped and no longer enjoy their job just have to tolerate it. as for me i am also one of the lucky ones. i have returned to my comfort level in my career, and see a light at the end of the tunnel which flashes only five years to retirement". but my prior 3 years working in the system was a dark never ending road that was leading me to a real scary place, with no end in sight., so i guess to shorten this up. if your in the wrong place medication and therapy will not cure the situation, and don't always think the problem is your to own. just because you fail or don't make it in a unit does not mean that you're a bad nurse, it may just be a bad fit. just hold your head up with pride and move on. sometimes the hand of fate will close the doors to your intentions and place you where you belong. trust me on this!!!
i have to disagree with what you said about me being one of the lucky few. i've worked at several places and have never tried to keep my illness a secret. i think that one of the major causes of the stigma associated with bipolar disorder (and other mental health problems) is that many of use do try to hide it and feel ashamed. if we can't accept ourselves than how can we expect others to accept us? furthermore, when a person with a negative preconceived notion about mental illness encounters someone who is high functioning and seems "normal" they realize that the stereotypes they had believed are untrue but if they only encounter people who are in the acute phase of their illness then they will think that's all there is to it. granted i don't go up to people, shake their hands, and say hi i'm ... i have bipolar disorder it's nice to meet you just like someone who's diabetic or has seizures or something wouldn't do that because that's kinda creepy but i've never lied about it either.
I have severe ADHD and I have always been open about it. When you go to the drug test, take your script with you. The test results are not evaluated for the employer. I was told that they just say pass or fail and if you test pos. For your script med(in my case adderall) they don't mention it. However I told my employer because I felt it would be better for her to know if I ramble verbally or have to talk out my thought process aloud...why it is I do that. When I was hired I told my coworkers and asked them to feel free to tell me "I got it" if I started to repeat myself ( I tend to do that). This way I could catch myself and still not out myself to the patients or families. Having a few " safeties in place really helps and my coworkers have been awesome. One of the positives about ADHD is I can multiple task like nobodies business which is great for nurses...my brain always runs on turbo so I'm never tired of critically thinking...now if only I could shut it off when I leave work! Lol
Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
,,,Sorry for the really long rambling post, just needed to unload a little bit. :)
ABSOLUTELY essential to have somewhere that you can unload - a trusted friend or two, a support group, an anonymous website, GOD - ALL of them preferably :) YES you want to maintain your educational track, your career track - but primary - YOU.
I think that there is anonymous, free counseling through the school, isn't there? Check it out, anonymously of course. Check out support groups which are free and anonymous. DBSA (depression Bipolar support anonymous) is a good resource.
I feel for you. But you're doing great. You've gotten some good intervention right off the bat. Keep that going, don't quit, don't hide, but yeah, you do want to protect yourself. The label isn't as important as managing the symptoms, and NOT waiting until your butt is on fire!!!
rant
27 Posts
I have schizoid personality disorder. PD aren't talked about much in nursing, and I believe, in general (and also concluded from having read this entire thread), most of the mental health issues within nursing revolve around mood and anxiety disorders.