Nurse fantasies

[zumalong]

What is your favorite nurse fantasy?? Come on now--get your mind out of the gutter. I mean the ultimate time, place, patient type that you would love to care for? The sky is the limit---there is no health insurance, you have no budget woes, you can chose to work at the bedside or from home on a computer. The hours are yours to do with as you will, the pay is whatever you think is necessary. What would you do?????:balloons:

Here is my ultimate nurse (nursing) fantasy: I want to work 9:30am to 2:30pm m,w,th. I am the nurse who screens the new residents to decide if they can step onto our unit. If they pass the test, they will then have to work with a nurse exclusively for the first 3 months of their medical school training. If they are at a satisfactory level by a nurses standard they can continue on to be a doctor. Our patients on this unit, can have a variety of problems (no cardiac as we don';t like to deal with chest pain)

There will be one nurse for each 2 patients. If one of the patients starts going bad then the other patient will be covered by the residents. (as they can deftly change an occupied bed after a 'humongous' brown alert). We will be able to sit and talk with our patients and if they chose to give us some food for our care--it will come with a pill that blocks all the fat and calories from our size 5 waistlines.

Well I have to leave my fantasy for now--I could tell you all about my real life experience--but I chose to sleep with my fantasy as I have to enter the nonfictional world at 0700 which is now only 6 hours away.

Dream a little dream with me...:kiss

[micro, RN]

I dream for a star trek kind of world.....

and would long to go where no man has gone before.......

so, hey.....

I could be a nurse chappel to a "bones"

but i would probably just be in the same uniform he was in.......

because my mini-mini-mini-mini skirt days are over........

but hey for the day.....that the doc can just run a wand over you and dx anything and probably fix the same thing without any invasiveness, any pain and anything else........

love the star trek movie.....the back in time one.....

where they come back for the whales......

and bones talks about the the "barbaric" medicine of this day and age.............

k'......

to my original thought of what i would dream for.....as a nurse.......

i don't know that i have a preferred kind of patient....cause actually i hate to see anybody in need of anything.........and a patient is in need of much.......

but as a nurse........i would love to see

an acuity system that actually took into account all that a patient demands.........(i.e. a vent patient doesn't equal a vent patient)......., (this copd'r doesn't = that copd'r), .........

t q 2* is not the same for every patient, enemas till clear on how many........patients.......and by when.........

nurses that can actually get along

.......and work with individual differences and strengths to make the best dam........... nursing team available.........

hey, maybe headsets for nurses aren't bad......

that way they could speak whenever a call came in, chart by voice even when they sat on the toilet, call doc's in the middle of the worst dressing change ever.............

and call *please help me I've fallen and can't get up*

when their back gives out for the last time.........

sorry all.......

micro is way in tooooo' great of a mood and is having a blast here on this one............

I wanna star trek world.....but unless reincarnation is real, probably won't be seein' it.........

other than that.....

a bit of truth and a bit of micro sarcasm in the above statements.......and i am leaving my pic up for this......

[micro, RN]

Originally posted by LasVegasRN

I would like to be the nurse case manager for the Rolling Stones for this current tour.

"Uh, Mick... can't take Geritol with a Harvey Wallbanger, that will make your ulcer flare up!"

"Keith......babe...no shame in using bronzing powder, just to give you a little glow..."

just thought that this was worth the double bandwith here....also.........

lsvs-rn you know ya' rock

micro and out...........

[P_RN, ADN, RN]

I guess I will go for the practical.

Have hospital nurses design the patient rooms and nurses station layout.

1. Closets will NOT be behind the head of the bed. Telephones will STAY close enough to be used by the patient AND the nurse if needs be.

2. Beds will be levitated by voice command. eg; "Bed....up, Bed transport to radiology, return when patients test complete."

3.Rooms accurately designed so the bathroom door does not break the nurses fingers.

4. Showers with shower chairs in all bathrooms, as NO nurse needs to lean over a tub, and NO sick person needs to sit down in a "stranger's tub."

5. Windows that have light activated shading core. Daytime no glare, night time no peeping toms.

6. A people mover from the garage to every nursing unit. This would coexist with the equipment and med cart mover track.

7. Sufficient seating in nurses station, sufficient terminals and a wall between us and the doctors so they can't noooge in and give "verbal orders" in the course of what you thought was conversation.

8. Computerized physician's orders. Anything hand written must be legible, block printed, signed and stamped with physicians name and pager/telephone number.

9. Uniform/shoe free benefits. Free meals, hour lunch time, sufficient float pool staff that will relieve for lunch.

10. Authorization to call agency/float pool in during a staff crisis.

11. Voice activated charting, door opening, light switches, call lights (have you ever needed to call the desk and can't find the button in a hurry?) BIG BRIGHT BLUE code button. BIG BRIGHT RED fire button....both only accessible by staff.

12. Self replenishing paper towels, toilet paper, gloves

13. linen cubby for each patient, refilled as needed with enough supplies. (No nurse/tech etc should have to "go look for a.......)

14. Escalators for visitors to use. They can do it in department stores no higher than the hospital. Leave the elevators for hospital business.

15. A MUTE button for each staff member if their brain goes ballistic BEFORE the words come out.

16. Benches in patient rooms for visitors, no "can you find us 7 chairs" Benches will retract at end of visiting hours and if nurse needs patient care privacy.

Hmmmmm all this seems DO ABLE huh?

[ERNurse752, RN]

Micro, I was going to go for the Star Trek world too. :)

[Rustyhammer]

I always thought a motorized med cart where you could ride down the hall, scan the patients wrist band and the meds would pop out in a little cup along with cup of water or juice of choice.

then you could give the meds, hit the "ok" button and cruise on to the next room.-Russell

[zumalong]

I love the idea of star trek. We could have a space evacuator (acme dumpalator) that would allow exit of all body fluids (including sputum and emesis)--thus we would not need to worry about skin care. There would be the virtual reality room like in next generation--where you could go and enjoy your breaks (of which you get as many as you want)

[mattsmom81]

Maybe we could get some of those little robots to do some of our dirty work for us...like cruise the unit at the end of visiting hours and kick out visitors who have worn out their welcome.

"Warning...Warning...you have exceeded the visiting time allotted...please exit immediately"

"I have been programmed to assist you out of the building" while gently nudging them out...hehehe.

[mario_ragucci]

First to design a cybernetic organism to perform a "sitters" position. This organism (part human and part machine) would hold a person down in bed. The organism would detain anyone to bedside, and respond when the PT needs life supporting and healing assistance only. It would scan bladders and rectums and take care of BM's. Otherwise, it would be quiet and still.

This is a silly post made for humor only, so don't think I am losing it, or am whacked out on imagination. I'm sorry :-(

[Furball]

Originally posted by mario_ragucci

First to design a cybernetic organism to perform a "sitters" position. This organism (part human and part machine) would hold a person down in bed. The organism would detain anyone to bedside, and respond when the PT needs life supporting and healing assistance only. It would scan bladders and rectums and take care of BM's. Otherwise, it would be quiet and still.

This is a silly post made for humor only, so don't think I am losing it, or am whacked out on imagination. I'm sorry :-(

Awesome idea!!! A machine to disimpact pts...wow! WHAT a concept!! love it......

[micro, RN]

Originally posted by ERNurse752

Micro, I was going to go for the Star Trek world too. :)

tell me more ERNurse........

hey, Mario.....

do you envision the day when not only bedside charting, but just voice and in............

what a waste of time is all this redundant charting..........

like, hey all

wouldn't it be cool to just be able to go in and just be a nurse.........

okay, micro will do practical.........

i think that nurses should be allowed no matter where to just walk in off the street, come in shower and change into the scurb or uniform of the day, org. etc.....

not just an uniform allowance, but please, just give me a pair of mundane scrubs to put on.......and do my laundry for me, I will be happy.........

hey, rusty.....the popem up motorized med cart.......cool.....like a new pixis system.............

[NancyRN]

I dream of voice activated bedside computers. I just tell the computer what I'm finding and it's charted. The computer takes vitals too! Then when I'm passing meds, the computer has them all sorted with allergies and drug/drug interactions, even reminding me to hold a drug when a BP is too low.....In fact, all this is actually possible right now!

[Brownms46]

In Taladega, Al. back in 1989, I saw a robot at a small out of the way hospital, that was being tested. It rolls around and you could chart on it by touching the screen, at the bedside, bringing up the usual phorifices for the condition. I would tell you when the next med was due, and how to give it, what reactions to watch for..etc. It recorded any supplies used..and so on. I don't know what all it did, but what I saw I was impressed.

I would really like to see what is available out there now...as their are many voiced acticated programs out there. I know they have greatly improved voice recogniton.