Men not helpful

Nurses Relations

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Hi guys,

There are are male team leaders(only male) at work who do nothing except sitting and talking and joking with staff( but without helping them) as if they are at a cafe.

Yesterday and today were heavy for me, and the team leader despite being free and roaming around as if he is on a picnic, did not help. If my patients are calling and I am busy, he just tells me that one patient called and I should see what he wanted.

Men are strong and they have bigger lung capacity and they are more powerful than us women yet they refuse to use that physical power.

They don't answer the calling bells from patients or take heavy patients to toilet.

What is the best way to handle the issue?

Should I email the charge nurse regarding the issue or tell them to move(they are senior in position to me btw)?

Specializes in Home Health (PDN), Camp Nursing.

Ahhh... you see my wife and many other woman (see how that sexism felt there) I have met suffer from this issue.

What you have done is mistook your coworker for a mind reader. You assume that he should notice your assignment is heavy, you assume that he should know exactly how and when to help you, and he should know all this with no direct input from you.

Now that's not saying your leader isnt lazy that's another issue entirely. However if you don't directly ask for help, then you can't really complain about not getting it can you. Furthermore when you directly asked for help you did get it, just not exactly when you wanted it.

Be clear, what you need, when you need it, and how it's helping.

For example I had a hard time getting help from my boss. I tell him "I need help on the floor during changeover" he would appear, do some tasks I didn't really need, and leave before the hard part started. I changed my request. " Boss. Changover is gonna crazy today because station 8 and 4 got on late. I need you to come out at 0930 and terminate station 6 and turn it over. Then please make sure the tech is doing ok, and assess the second shift station 10 because she gets started early and I won't be able to get over to assess her before we're over the allotted time. Thanks!

Much better results with the second one. Give it a try, also try narrowing it into a yes or no question, to make sure the commitment to help is there.

Good luck.

When I worked on the floor with all women CNAs and a 200lb+ patient had to be transferred, guess who they all scoured the floor for? That's right, me, a 6'2" 190lb man. A little more sensitivity would be nice; maybe I'm starting to see why your not getting help.

Specializes in Pedi.

What is the role of the team leader? Presumably not to toilet patients and answer call bells. Do you not have aides? Team leaders/managers have duties that staff nurses are frequently not aware of. I agree that some of them would not roll up their sleeves and help no matter what- the one I worked for wouldn't have- but I know others who would. Gender does not play into the equation here.

Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
Hi guys

Hi Sweetie!

There are are male team leaders(only male) at work who do nothing except sitting and talking and joking with staff( but without helping them) as if they are at a cafe.

Well SOMEBODY has to do it. It's a "differentiation of duties". We're there for entertainment and morale purposes.

Yesterday and today were heavy for me, and the team leader despite being free and roaming around as if he is on a picnic, did not help. If my patients are calling and I am busy, he just tells me that one patient called and I should see what he wanted.

Yep. That's called "delegation of duties"! So, what's your point?

Men are strong and they have bigger lung capacity and they are more powerful than us women yet they refuse to use that physical power.

You've haven't met my wife, Belinda the Amazon Woman RN.

They don't answer the calling bells from patients or take heavy patients to toilet.

Uh huh. Yeah.

What is the best way to handle the issue?

Heck, we don't take patients to the toilet. We don't handle tissues or issues!

Should I email the charge nurse regarding the issue or tell them to move(they are senior in position to me btw)?

Yeah, the email is best. That way only a delete button needs to be pushed and no piece of paper needs to be shredded.

If there's anything else I can do for you, well... just do it for yourself.

Specializes in Case manager, float pool, and more.
Men are strong and they have bigger lung capacity and they are more powerful than us women yet they refuse to use that physical power.

I know some ladies who can lift just as well as any man can.

The issue you are having has nothing to do with a person's gender or any other stereotype. Ask for help when you need it clearly. Talk to your co-worker.

This statement is just so biased and stereotypical in nature that I can't even read through it to get to the "real" question. Just because a man is lazy, it does not mean all men are lazy... or that they are lazy because they are men. Most of the men I work with are more than willing to step to the plate when no one else will. Another assumption that annoys the daylights out of me is that - because someone is male - that they must help us "feeble" women. Ha!

Lets just be real... real women are not helpless pea-brains in skirts who need to be sheltered from the slight possibility of a callous, nor do we need a man to grab something from the high shelf. Give us the ladder, hand us the shovel... just don't say we NEED a man for help. I will not even tolerate my husband touching any of the tasks deemed "manly" (mostly because he will mess it up)... I will put the desk together, I will roll the washer out of the house, I will crawl up in the attic and change the transformer... I've also changed toilet rings, brake pads, and oil.

Yes, all HUMAN BEINGS need help at some time or another... but I'm sure there were other women standing around who could have offered help, too... not just men.

here comes a third wave feminist

here comes a third wave feminist

I will go out on a limb and assume this is a reference to me?

If so - No, I am not a feminist... Yes, I am all for equality... for everyone... regardless of reason... and most certainly have very little contempt for people who display stereotypical or biased opinions. Yes, I may have come off a little feminist in defense of this belief, but this was not the intent. I just don't like it when an entire population is labeled based on the experience of one person.... this annoys me to no end. Go ahead and make fun of this opinion - as I will not be embarrassed at all.

I know some ladies who can lift just as well as any man can.

As any man? I doubt that. Maybe some men, definitely not ANY man.

Specializes in OB-Gyn/Primary Care/Ambulatory Leadership.
As any man? I doubt that. Maybe some men, definitely not ANY man.

Really? We need to do that?

I bet people love you at parties.

Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
I know some ladies who can lift just as well as any man can.

As any man? I doubt that. Maybe some men, definitely not ANY man.

You've haven't met my wife, Belinda the Amazon Woman RN.

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Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
Go ahead and make fun of this opinion - as I will not be embarrassed at all.

Well, gosh, ladedah, it's no fun to make fun... um... er.. "have fun" with your opinion if you give us permission!

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