Men not helpful

Mr_Edwino · Feb 18, 2018

I shall then enjoy a spot of tea whilst awaiting your correspondence.

(And I'll learn how to use the quote function properly hehe)

Mr_Edwino · Feb 18, 2018

You know - people don't use this word enough. I like this word. I shall use it whilst trying to convey my point next time.

I shall then enjoy a spot of tea whilst awaiting your correspondence.

LoveMyRNlife · Feb 18, 2018

I shall then enjoy a spot of tea whilst awaiting your correspondence.
(And learn how to use the quote function properly hehe)

My only excuse is that I was being lazy on my day off! Lol í ½í¸‚

thoughtful21, BSN, RN · Feb 18, 2018

When I worked on the floor with all women CNAs and a 200lb+ patient had to be transferred, guess who they all scoured the floor for? That's right, me, a 6'2" 190lb man.

Maybe it's not stereotyping...maybe they just love working with you...!!! :) :) :)

Apple-Core, ASN, BSN, RN · Feb 18, 2018

The irony is, that as a guy, I usually do much more than my share of lifting, as I'm the first one to be asked to help others do it. But yeah, I've got to agree about the title of your post. Substitute the word "men" with any other group, and you'd see how offensively it could be taken.

I was told it was sexist to ask the men to do the heavy lifting in my workplace. Personally I think that is taking things too far in terms of political correctness.

As far as laziness goes - I know plenty of lazy women; laziness is genderless - it's based on character, not your sex.

Ruby Vee, BSN · Feb 18, 2018

Hi guys,
There are are male team leaders(only male) at work who do nothing except sitting and talking and joking with staff( but without helping them) as if they are at a cafe.
Yesterday and today were heavy for me, and the team leader despite being free and roaming around as if he is on a picnic, did not help. If my patients are calling and I am busy, he just tells me that one patient called and I should see what he wanted.
Men are strong and they have bigger lung capacity and they are more powerful than us women yet they refuse to use that physical power.
They don't answer the calling bells from patients or take heavy patients to toilet.
What is the best way to handle the issue?
Should I email the charge nurse regarding the issue or tell them to move(they are senior in position to me btw)?

Perhaps one good way to handle the issue is not to genderize or generalize. Some nurses aren't helpful, some of the unhelpful nurses are men. I'm sure if you look with an open mind, you'll find unhelpful female nurses and helpful males.

I would urge you to take a good, long look at your part in these interactions with other nurses. Did you ASK for help? Did you ask for something specific and appropriate? (For instance, one of my former colleagues would be floundering all day every day. He used to ask me to do his assessments and chart them. Those are things he should be doing himself. While I was more than happy to help out with giving a med, taking vital signs, turning and repositioning his patient, etc. doing his assessment wasn't appropriate.)

As a charge nurse, I'll just add that a lot of what we do -- planning assignments, transfers, figuring out how to shoehorn in that last addition to the OR schedule, calling in extra staff, waiting for phone calls from physicians, supervisors, ancillary services, etc. -- none of that LOOKS like work to someone who doesn't understand all the requirements of the job. Walking around "as if they're at a picnic" may be simply eyeballing each patient to make sure they're all alive and not in distress and eyeballing each nurse to evaluate whether they're under control or floundering. Also a necessary part of the job.

Ruby Vee, BSN · Feb 18, 2018

The only time I ask my male coworkers to help me with a patient is if there is a serious concern that the patient will fall d/t there size and weakness. My fellow male coworkers have just as much work or more at times and I try not to ask them for help unless absolutely needed. I usually have no issues with female nurses helping me, even with very large patients.
I would also echo what everyone else said, if you are swamped and need help you must be direct in your request for help. Let's face it, we are ALL very busy 99.9% of the time in the hospital. Someone not recognizing you are drowning is not unwillingness to help, it is more like they are running over the list in their head of things they have to do. They may be waiting on an important call while you observe them "standing around joking". A quick, "hey can you help so and so to the bathroom and tell them to pull the cord when they are done and I will be in there" works great.

If the patient is a known grabber, I'll ask my male coworkers to help. Most grabbers won't grab in the presence of another male whom they think might take them to task for it.

Ruby Vee, BSN · Feb 18, 2018

I will go out on a limb and assume this is a reference to me?
If so - No, I am not a feminist... Yes, I am all for equality... for everyone... regardless of reason... and most certainly have very little contempt for people who display stereotypical or biased opinions. Yes, I may have come off a little feminist in defense of this belief, but this was not the intent. I just don't like it when an entire population is labeled based on the experience of one person.... this annoys me to no end. Go ahead and make fun of this opinion - as I will not be embarrassed at all.

Shame on you. Everyone should be a feminist. Feminism is all about equality for everyone.

opalbee · Feb 18, 2018

Shame on you. Everyone should be a feminist. Feminism is all about equality for everyone.

Often times people deny feminism because of the negative (and irrelevant, really) connotation associated with it, or because they think that to be a feminist you have to be female and actively protesting. Both of these notions need to go.

db2xs · Feb 18, 2018

Still waiting to hear from OP.

LoveMyRNlife · Feb 18, 2018

If the patient is a known grabber, I'll ask my male coworkers to help. Most grabbers won't grab in the presence of another male whom they think might take them to task for it.

Very true Ruby, forgot to add that in. :) I work with a great staff, male and female, it is one of the reasons I chose to work there.

macawake, MSN · Feb 18, 2018

here comes a third wave feminist

I don't understand the purpose of this comment.

I agree, it seemed rather pointless.

One can certainly suspect the presence of criticism or some kind of negative bias in the comment but since GE90 chose to not elaborate, we can only guess what the purpose of the post was.

I know some ladies who can lift just as well as any man can.

As any man? I doubt that. Maybe some men, definitely not ANY man.

Mr_Edwino, I think you are nitpicking. I took Crush's "any man" to mean any random or "average" man, not literally ANY man on planet earth. I doubt Crush is a moron so s/he in all likelihood realizes that the world's strongest person is a male.

Sometimes I wonder if people misunderstand each other on purpose?

No, I am not a feminist... Yes, I am all for equality... for everyone... regardless of reason... and most certainly have very little contempt for people who display stereotypical or biased opinions. Yes, I may have come off a little feminist in defense of this belief, but this was not the intent.

I'm all for equality too, including equality for women. In my opinion that last part is the very definition of a feminist. Equal rights. Equal obligations. I guess I don't understand how one can be for equality for women, but balk at being labeled a feminist?

Feminism is all about equality for everyone.

Agreed.

Often times people deny feminism because of the negative (and irrelevant, really) connotation associated with it, or because they think that to be a feminist you have to be female and actively protesting. Both of these notions need to go.

:up:

I believe some people operate under the misconception that being a feminist means you are some kind of rabid man-hating ****crusher :rolleyes: Others simply do their best to propogate that definition as a strategy to try to invalidate/delegitimize a feminist's viewpoint . Accuse someone of being something unflattering and you put them in a defensive position where they feel forced to explain how they don't hate men at all.

Well, I'm a feminist. And proud of it.

And I loooove men :inlove: