I just graduated from nursing school and have a job lined up!! It was actually my first choice job, so I'm pretty excited. My husband and I have been wanting to start trying for our first baby for quite some time (we are both 30 and not getting any younger!!). We are debating between starting to try now or waiting until I have been working for 3 months so that I will be eligible for FMLA by the time the baby is due.
I would like to take 12 weeks off, but I would be okay with only having 6 weeks off. Also, if I didn't have enough PTO to cover my time off, we would be okay financially, so that isn't an issue. What I am worried about is whether they will keep my job open while I am off. I know they don't technically have to unless I'm covered by FMLA. However, the hospital seems to be pretty family friendly. But, there is definitely not a nurse shortage in my city - new grads are having trouble finding jobs. I really want to keep this job and continue working there after I have a baby, but I really want to have a baby too. We've been putting off having a family for so long due to school, jobs, etc. Has anyone else been in this situation or know someone who has? Do you think that they will let me have time off and will hold my job open?
agree with above poster, I would wait 3 or more months. You want to have FMLA available to you, plus you might have every intention of working up untill your due date, but there could be complications requiring you to go on bedrest, baby comes early....
I would wait because what if you get put on bedrest or something plus you want to feel like you have a good handle on your new job before having a baby but if you really want to have a baby do it also I know that alot of times when new people get pregnant right away they are looked down on because its like you have not proved yourself or pulled your own weight yet but its up to you
If I were in your shoes, I'd wait until I'm eligible for FMLA (I think it kicks in after working for a year in the company and rendering 1250 hours). With these tough economic times, it's also hard to find a job and earn some money-----and raising a baby will obviously cost you some money. There are many things to consider.....what if you have a complicated pregnancy and be off earlier than what you anticipated? What if you have a sick baby? Although we want to think positive here, just think of what will happen to your job if you don't have FMLA and have to call out all the time? They may seem "friendly" now, but wait until you absent yourself frequently and see their reaction. A baby is a gift and is so wonderful to have. However, you also need to be able to provide adequately because babies need food, formula, diapers, etc. J
Yes, you should wait at least 6 months. Being pregnant can sometimes be so hard, although I've only been pregnant once and had a child once, it was such a hard experience with morning sickness (I had to take prescription pills b/c I lost 15 lbs due to nausea) and then I had pre-eclampsia, and I very hard delivery and recovery included depression. I could not have imagined being able to workd during my first 4 months of pregnancy b/c they were so difficult. I'm not saying this will happened to you, but you just want to be cautious. If you wait, you'll be more comfortable in your job with 6 months experience, and God forbid you have your baby before 40 weeks you'll be covered for family leave. :-)
If I were in your shoes, I’d wait until I’m eligible for FMLA (I think it kicks in after working for a year in the company and rendering 1250 hours). With these tough economic times, it’s also hard to find a job and earn some money-----and raising a baby will obviously cost you some money. There are many things to consider…..what if you have a complicated pregnancy and be off earlier than what you anticipated? What if you have a sick baby? Although we want to think positive here, just think of what will happen to your job if you don’t have FMLA and have to call out all the time? They may seem “friendly” now, but wait until you absent yourself frequently and see their reaction. A baby is a gift and is so wonderful to have. However, you also need to be able to provide adequately because babies need food, formula, diapers, etc. J
I agree with this. You are assuming that you will not need any time off for any pregnancy related reason until the birth, but that may not be the case.
There was another thread similar to this recently about holding a job open or not after being off on FMLA. I'm not an expert on this, but it seems that your employer has to keep A job open for you, but not necessarily the same job. So as long as they bring you back in the same capacity, they can make you work on a different unit/floor. You may want to check into this further before deciding what to do.
Its always either "wait to have kids until you are done with school" or "wait until you are working for x amount of months before trying for a baby." It really is damned if you do, damned if you don't if you are a woman of childbearing age. And that is really frustrating that as a woman, you are often put in the position of choosing between a family and a career. Why is it so impossible to have both?
I know what you mean. I feel like I've already waited so long to have kids. We want to have at least 3 kids and I'd like to have them before I turn 35, and I'm already 30! I always wanted to be a younger mom, but it's too late for that! I want to have both a career and family and that seems so hard to do. I know you can never wait for the "perfect" time to have kids, because if you did, you'd probably never have them. Deciding when to have kids is such a difficult decision to make! I feel so conflicted.
well if it makes you feel better, I just became licensed last month and am currently 18 weeks pregnant. My husband and I did not want to wait any longer. If I don't get a job before baby, it will have to happen after. Some may think I am shooting myself in the foot a bit and letting months go by without gaining any real working experience, but who knows exactly how long it will be before I can even find something. Starting a family now made more sense to us.
Its always either "wait to have kids until you are done with school" or "wait until you are working for x amount of months before trying for a baby." It really is damned if you do, damned if you don't if you are a woman of childbearing age. And that is really frustrating that as a woman, you are often put in the position of choosing between a family and a career. Why is it so impossible to have both?
I commend those of you who wait until you are mature and financially stable before having children but like everything in life there are sacrifices that might need to be made. Sadly there are very few times when we can have our cake and eat it too. Its not impossible to have both it just requires some juggling fortunately as nurses we are good at that. :)
Yes it's true it is so hard for women to have children and now with the economy keep a job and all...we have to sacrifice so much to have our family, kids, and career. There is a country, I think sweeden but not sure, where women get a year off paid and even get to bring their kids in to work. The taxes are crazy there and they live in such small apartments and have only the basic needs, but they are so happy. Who wouldn't when you can work and have the security of keeping your job and bringing our kids to work if you wish.
LoveMyBugs, BSN, CNA, RN
1,316 Posts
agree with above poster, I would wait 3 or more months. You want to have FMLA available to you, plus you might have every intention of working up untill your due date, but there could be complications requiring you to go on bedrest, baby comes early....