need help for severe depression

Nurses General Nursing

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I am an RN that lives for my career. I am now faced with the probability of losing the career I wanted for so long & worked so hard for.Severe depression has officially taken over. This past year has been really awful. it started with a severe fatal stoke in the family,then I had 3 herniated disks in my cervical spine and ended up with fusion, then an emergency quadruple bypass on my father in law (where I ended up the main caregiver), My son (19) had recurring bouts of undiagnosed pancreatitis followed by gallbladder surgery, I had a car wreck that left me with a herniatd disk in my lumbar spine and will probable not be able to return to my job. top that off with a disabled spouse for the last 6years. so my income was the only one. now that doesn't exist.I don't know what to do anymore. i can't seem to get anything done, nor do i want to.antidepressants don't seem to be helping now.anyone have any ideas???

PS what is pm and how does it work? (that probably sounds stupid but I'm new here and don't chat much online) Thanks. Rhonda

pm is for private message, and if you want to send a pm to someone here, then you just look in the upper left side of the post, that's where the person's name is located

then you click on their name and the box appears with the "private message"

(I learn something new everyday)

keep well

Thanks!

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Specializes in Critical Care/ICU.
In response to your first question I'm sorry to say yes. I don't mean to alarm anyone. I have thought about it 'logically' and cannot do anything. the pain something like that would cause my family is unbearable to think about....to allay fears I have no intentions or plans.

I tried to tell the GP the last time i saw him but I worry that if i say I am having these thoughts i will be put on a mandatory 72 hour hold in a psych unit (state law) I could not handle that.

Your fear of a 72 hour hold, I think, is justified, but I would think that with what stated in the first part I quoted, your doctor should realize that you need help, but not something as radical as a hold and steer you in the right direction as earle58 states, a psychiatrist to manage your depression properly.

At any rate, the very best to you. I have never been in a place such as yours, I would think that it takes a lot just to come here and talk about it and respond to other's replies. That is one good thing you're doing for yourself! :)

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Needs Help,

As my tag line states you have taken the first step in a long and sometimes painful journey. I know it takes great courage to face our inner fears. Please do whatever you need to do to get help and remain safe. I hope you will not be offended if I say a prayer for you and for each one of the posters who shared so much of their lives and their struggles on this particular thread. Please stay in touch, we do care and want you to feel better.

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Specializes in Nursing assistant.

Thank you for keeping us updated. I have a family full of OCD and depression, and I know how difficult it is. In addition to PTSD being instumental in cause/ trigger, there are some studies that suggest there is a very strong genetic component.

I will say this: not everyone understands these disorders. Those who do not struggle in this way rarely have the empathy to understand something so remote from their experience. Try not to let this get you more down. I remind my self often, would I understand this if I had not experienced it personally?

OCD makes depression so much more complex. It is so important to talk to your physician about this as well as finding adequate treatment for your pain. Pain that has gone undiminished for this long time is depleting your ability to cope. If you are stressed, this effects your brain chemistry, which really can set the OCD into overdrive! Alot of the thoughts that are troubling you may have this as a source. PLEASE let your doctor know and loved ones know if you feel you are unsafe.

I am saying all this only from the heart. I am not a nurse yet, so take this as only a fellow human who is concerned for your wellbeing.

I have been so impressed with the responses of so many of the nurses: remarkable empathy.

You are in my prayers!

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hi. Psych nurse here. Hope you are feeling better. Please don't fear talking witih your Dr. because he will put u on a hold...unless things have changed, you are not actively suicidal, that is, you do not have a plan to do it and the means to carry it out...perhaps your antidepressent needs to be changed...one thing for sure is that you should get some counceling...you have had many stressors and have a lot to grieve about. On the stress charts, your probably off the scale. Other than keeping yourself safe and talking to your Dr., my advise is to find some time each day to do something enjoyable for yourself, to give equal time for the good in your life (could be a blue sky...or reading these replys).

\On the other hand, if you are forming a plan to end your life, you need to go into a hospital. So, if that is the case, go to your emergency room right now.

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hi. Psych nurse here. Hope you are feeling better. Please don't fear talking witih your Dr. because he will put u on a hold...unless things have changed, you are not actively suicidal, that is, you do not have a plan to do it and the means to carry it out...perhaps your antidepressent needs to be changed...one thing for sure is that you should get some counceling...you have had many stressors and have a lot to grieve about. On the stress charts, your probably off the scale. Other than keeping yourself safe and talking to your Dr., my advise is to find some time each day to do something enjoyable for yourself, to give equal time for the good in your life (could be a blue sky...or reading these replys).

\On the other hand, if you are forming a plan to end your life, you need to go into a hospital. So, if that is the case, go to your emergency room right now.

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I wish you the best of luck and I hope that things start to turn for the better starting here with support. I agree with what another member has said that maybe you can enlist some help from other family members, friends, or neighbours. In the past I have sought counselling to solve family issues and I found that talking to someone really helped me out and they can probably link you up with resources in your community. You are not alone and there is always someone nearby that will lend a helping hand. I'm glad to see that you have reached out on here and I hope these posts truly help you be the strong and lively person you are!

:redpinkhe

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I wish you the best of luck and I hope that things start to turn for the better starting here with support. I agree with what another member has said that maybe you can enlist some help from other family members, friends, or neighbours. In the past I have sought counselling to solve family issues and I found that talking to someone really helped me out and they can probably link you up with resources in your community. You are not alone and there is always someone nearby that will lend a helping hand. I'm glad to see that you have reached out on here and I hope these posts truly help you be the strong and lively person you are!

:redpinkhe

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Specializes in Med-Surg, Geriatric, Behavioral Health.

I'm also glad that you replied to our posts to let us know how things are currently going with you. You have some support here, as you can see. Another poster recommends building your supports on your end...where you are at. I whole heartedly agree. Depression keeps one isolated. By making a point to place yourself with others, you are working in a positive direction. Harry Potter also gives a good recommendation by making a point to put some sunshine into each day...even if it is just one good thing each day. Also, not only does depression suck away one's hope, it often does the same with one's will...leaving one at the mercy of the wind and helpless. Making a decision each day to commit to your own growth out of depression is so important...putting oneself back in charge in one's life. The things that you have no control over...let them go. The only thing you have control over right now is you and how you progress through your depression. Don't get too discouraged about progress being slow or too slow for your liking. The most "sustaining" progress IS progress that is slow, a little at a time. Rushing progress too fast often resorts in more frustration and discouragement, especially if it falls apart. I know the temptation to make things better now and asap is so appealing...especially when one suffers. But...do go slow, and try making movement forward each day. The thing about depression too is it is usually most difficult making movement initially. But when you begin to make movement, even if it feels slow, it is easier to maintain it and keep moving forward than when you are at a complete stop. Moving foward is the key.

I do wish you the very best, Rhonda.

I encourage you to continue being a part of our online family.

Wolfy

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UPDATE. Hi everyone. I'm sorry it's been a while since I have logged on and sorry if some of you were worried. I have been struggling. I am doing some better now with the depression. I am currently on 225mg of effexor.(high dose huh-never seen anyone on that much). At least I am no lonlger wishing I was dead ALL the time (just rarely now). I am seeing a professional now as many of you wonderful people encouraged. THANK YOU!!!!My world has not gotten much better than the last time i logged on but I am dealing with it a little better now. I am still out of work. Indefinate is what my doctor listed as an estimate of return to work. They are now thinking this may take "months to years" to recover from. I'm waiting on MRI results that I had done of Friday. The doctors are finally investigating my hip. I've been telling them all along that when I put weight on my Left leg it really hurt. at least they are now checking it out. There may be a hairline fracture that was missed or something is what the doctors are thinking now in addition to the bad disk in my back. I had the nerve block done and had a reaction to the injection (just my luck) It didn't help with the pain in the end anyway. I just found out today that if I am not back to work by April 6th I will have lost my job anyway, so I guess I was right before when I expected to loose it. At least now I know right? I still do not know what I am going to do with my life anymore. I am constantly taking pain meds to be able to function at all. as soon as I get up and start doing things the pain just gets worse though. I am also on crutches now until the MRI is back, at least. can't do much on crutches.

I better get going now. I am finally going to go out tomorrow and have my hair done(haven't done that since Now.) Even though I don't sleep well I had better at least try. I just wanted to let anyone that might be interested know that I was still around and fighting to get better. Thanks for all of your help and kind words. I'll try not to take so long in the future to update you. Thanks again Rhonda

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Specializes in obstetrics(high risk antepartum, L/D,etc.

Bless your heart. You are in my prayers. :saint:

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Specializes in Med-Surg, Trauma, Ortho, Neuro, Cardiac.

Glad to hear things are on an upswing. I hope it continues to get better. Best wishes.

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