Need advice, transgender nurse on probation

Emod · Feb 18, 2017

God bless you! Unbelievable what you've been through. You are a survivor and will thrive. This I know. I'm from the Midwest so I can't speak with confidence about the BON or job hunt in AZ, but I do know you will find the right job for you, and wherever YOU choose to work will be blessed to have you.

Try LTC, hone health, clinics, doc office's for starters. Please keep us posted.

allnurses Guide · Feb 18, 2017

I would offer you these words of encouragement - you have come so far through so much these last hurdles will be small ones. Does your agreement with the BON require you to be in a peer support group? If so find out where your peers are working. Generally speaking (IF you are not on the OIG list) psych facilities, nursing homes and dialysis centers are good places to work if you have stips on your license.

The facility where I work in California is very friendly to nurses with stipulations.

Congratulations on where you journey has brought you. The best is yet to come.

Hppy.

Sweetheart RN · Feb 18, 2017

I have no requirements to be a part of a peer support group, I do have to have quarterly reports from a psychologist though. The nursing board was initially pushing for drug testing, AA and a nurse recovery group, but I managed to get the nursing board to let up on that when there was zero evidence of substance abuse.

Alright, I'll start looking in those area's.

caliotter3 · Feb 18, 2017

You are a very strong person to have stuck it out this far. Seek assistance from one of those support groups that PP mentioned. Networking gets lots of people jobs. And don't forget LTC facilities. Get a start there and you can move on, when, and if, the time is right. Best wishes.

MierKat · Feb 18, 2017

I can't believe what you've been through. Nothing to add but I hope your job search is successful and quick and that you find a great job with supportive coworkers.

Sweetheart RN · Feb 18, 2017

I really hope so too, ty MierKat

CrunchRN, ADN, RN · Feb 19, 2017

I have no advice, but I am wishing you success. After all of that I am sure you have the ability to succeed.

KCMnurse, BSN, MSN, RN · Feb 22, 2017

All I can say is wow! You have been through so much, I commend your ability to keep your eye on the prize and fight your way over every obstacle put in your way. I don't have any job advice but I am sure that whoever hires you will acquire a gem!

celtic harper · Mar 31, 2017

Well Sweetheart RN, you have certainly been the target of a witch hunt! So glad you are finding your way out of that darkness. I'm a 62-year-old RN, the Access RN for Orthopaedics at a university medical center (meaning I carry the positional pager for the Orthopaedic Service), and am the public face of Orthopaedics for our institution. I've been here for fourteen years. I am also transgender, out and visible. I didn't plan it that way, but I came out to my nurse manager during the application process because someone in the administration of an important former employer was making it impossible for me to get hired, and I figured that being up-front about it was the only possible way. Thankfully, it paid off. When I transitioned, male-to-female, things were so much different than now; transfolk were much less known, we had to do huge amounts of education on our own behalf, and we accepted that were in a fight for our lives. I still can hardly believe that I managed to successfully transition as the only lesbian transsexual school nurse in the known universe (at the time). . . the morning I stuffed a hundred-and-ten coming-out letters and transition FAQs into the faculty mailboxes is particularly memorable. The point of this rambling is that in your situation you are probably going to have to bare a whole lot more of your soul (and body) in your job-hunt process than is fashionable these days- or that you perhaps feel you should have.

Unfortunately, as you know, we transfolk are all guilty even after proven innocent, and you will still be dealing with this years and years from now. Coming-out never ends. The micro (and macro) aggressions never stop. Don't look cis, you're a man in a dress. Look too good, other women will hate you, and won't be shy about telling you. Women say they have to be twice as good as a man to be considered half as good? Darling, you can double that, just for a start.

If that's where it ended, this would surely be bleak, but it's not. Use this as a source of strength, and use it to inform your practice at all levels. The hurts you have suffered can make you hard, and bitter; use them, instead, to help yourself become kinder and gentler. Learn from everything you have experienced.

BTW, a year-and-a-half ago, while doing a nursing grand rounds on transgender issues, I got asked to start a local peer-support group, and now I faciliate an every-other-week group for "all transgressors of gender." Too bad you live a long way off- it's a good group, the conversation ranges widely, and there's a lot of laughter.

celtic harper · Aug 7, 2018

Hello all,
Thanks to those who took their time to to read all this,
Sweetheart RN

Hey, Sweetheart RN- are you out there? How are you?

Persephone Paige, ADN · Aug 9, 2018

First, CONGRATULATIONS on keeping your **** relatively together! Second, I'm sorry you had to go through all that. People in the medical profession can in general be *******s. And welcome to our "world," of eclectic, often misunderstood, but very supportive black sheep. I'm sure it's been a horrible ride, but you are no longer alone.

You have a lot to offer... Try Dialysis, Psych facilities, Public Health ( state/government tend to be more accepting because the have to be ), Poison Control and I can't think of anything else just now.

Do not lose hope, you're gonna run into more *******s. Just know us drug addicts (in recovery) are running into the same *******s and it's not just you. As lame as that seems, it always helps me to know that someone else is fighting the good fight too.

I wish you every happiness.