My Sweet Little Angel Patient Passed Away Today

Nurses General Nursing

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I've been taking care of an absolute angel for the past 3 years. She had Batten Disease and the doctors said she wouldn't survive past the age of 7. Well she showed them and almost made it to 21. She went peacefully in the PICU surrounded by all her family, caregivers, and every nurse staffed in the PICU. She was a frequent flyer to that particular hospital, so all the nurses knew her and loved her. When her heartrate started dropping, they each came in with a box of kleenex. I don't think I've seen so many boxes of kleenex piled onto a bed in my life. :) It was all very sad. But she's in heaven now, running and playing like she was never able to do while she was here.

I guess I'll have to take a real job now, because she never felt like work. But at this particular moment, I'd really rather do something other than nursing like sell cars. I'll probably get over it soon though, because earlier this week, I oriented on a new case with the sweetest little boy........

I know how you feel, I take care of a little boy they said would not make it past his 1st birthday and he is 10 now. But 2 years ago I went into his house and was greated by his brother stating he was sick. Well I didn't think anything at first because he gets sick alot. But the minute I saw him I knew something was wrong. Well my nursing skills took over, and I did what I had to do to keep him going. When the ambulance got there I about broke down then but kept it together. I rode the ambulance with him to the hospital so that I could bag him while the paramedic did his job and the EMT drove. I did break down when the paramedic touched him on the eye and the little boy didn't blink, move or nothing. Once we got to the ER and I relayed what was going on with him that morning, well needless to say I crawled the Doctor's a$% when he walked in and said "Whats the problem isn't he like this anyway?" He has Myotubular Myopathy which is a rare form of MD. I jumped back and said "no he can breath on his own for 8 hours, he drives his own w/c, plays video games and goes to school, he is not comatose." Well the doctor started working on him then, and then they shipped him to the Childrens Hospital where he normally goes a hour away. His mother said once he got up there he looked around and said "what am I doing in the hospital I'm not sick". Come to find out his IVP machine malfunctioned and he was deprived of O2 that morning. I thank God everyday that he made it, because if he would have died that day I do not know if I could have continued taking care of another child, because he is like my own, as you probably felt your little angel was like yours too. It takes special nurses to take care of a sick child day in and out, and to care about them to. It will get easier though, like you said she is probably doing all the things that she couldn't do in her earthly body.

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Specializes in Med-Surg, Trauma, Ortho, Neuro, Cardiac.

My condolences to the loss of your patient/friend.

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Specializes in Nephrology, Cardiology, ER, ICU.

There is a special place in heaven for the special-needs kids and especially for those that provide the care. Thanks for being such a wonderful person and special nurse.

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I tried to post a huggy smiley but couldn't find one.

{{{Brita}}}

Thanks for the hug, Tazzi, I can always use those.

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I know how you feel, I take care of a little boy they said would not make it past his 1st birthday and he is 10 now. But 2 years ago I went into his house and was greated by his brother stating he was sick. Well I didn't think anything at first because he gets sick alot. But the minute I saw him I knew something was wrong. Well my nursing skills took over, and I did what I had to do to keep him going. When the ambulance got there I about broke down then but kept it together. I rode the ambulance with him to the hospital so that I could bag him while the paramedic did his job and the EMT drove. I did break down when the paramedic touched him on the eye and the little boy didn't blink, move or nothing. Once we got to the ER and I relayed what was going on with him that morning, well needless to say I crawled the Doctor's a$% when he walked in and said "Whats the problem isn't he like this anyway?" He has Myotubular Myopathy which is a rare form of MD. I jumped back and said "no he can breath on his own for 8 hours, he drives his own w/c, plays video games and goes to school, he is not comatose." Well the doctor started working on him then, and then they shipped him to the Childrens Hospital where he normally goes a hour away. His mother said once he got up there he looked around and said "what am I doing in the hospital I'm not sick". Come to find out his IVP machine malfunctioned and he was deprived of O2 that morning. I thank God everyday that he made it, because if he would have died that day I do not know if I could have continued taking care of another child, because he is like my own, as you probably felt your little angel was like yours too. It takes special nurses to take care of a sick child day in and out, and to care about them to. It will get easier though, like you said she is probably doing all the things that she couldn't do in her earthly body.

You were a wonderful advocate for your patient. I know how special he is to you. I always joked with my patient's mother and the other nurses and DSPs on the case that I wouldn't take care of anyone else when she no longer needed me, because she spoiled me. All of her caregivers agreed that they were spoiled too. :)

Speaking of breaking down, I was able to hold it together for about 45 minutes at her bedside even as I watched her Cheynes-Stokes breathing the whole time. Then her PICU nurse came in when her heartrate began it's initial drop. I took one look at the nurse's face (she had started crying) and then I lost it. Then everyone in the room lost it. I always thought I would stay professional when her time came. Who knew I would end up almost running down the halls and out of the hospital sobbing. Like they say, you never know how you're going to react to a situation until it happens.

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My condolences to the loss of your patient/friend.

Thank you Tweety. Much appreciation.

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There is a special place in heaven for the special-needs kids and especially for those that provide the care. Thanks for being such a wonderful person and special nurse.

Thank you. She is definitely in heaven. Hopefully she'll put in a good word for me. :lol2:

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Specializes in Hospice, Med/Surg, ICU, ER.
Thank you. She is definitely in heaven. Hopefully she'll put in a good word for me. :lol2:

You don't need a good word, friend. Your good word is already written in your heart; God already knows you well.

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Thank you. She is definitely in heaven. Hopefully she'll put in a good word for me. :lol2:
The Lord got another angel in Heaven, and has a beautiful angel who ministered to her right here on earth. You are the true definition of what a nurse is all about. Love and Peace to you. WW.
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May God bless and keep you. :saint:

Your Angel has returned home.

:biggringi Praise be to God for giving us wonderful gifts of persons in our lives! Amen, your angel is with Jesus now! That`s the best thing that will happen to all those who believe in Him! Rest assured, your angel is praying for you too! May the dear good Lord multiply your kindness and caring moments a thousandfolds in blessings for you and your family! In case, the family of angel has not given any word of appreciation to you my dear, ( I know they did), may you always remember that nurses like you and me, makes a lot of difference in loving and caring... thank you my dear for keeping up the good nursing spirit! Hooray to another Nightingale!!

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THIS is why we can never become a society that weeds out its "defective" individuals. I have two special needs grandsons who give and receive love with their whole hearts. Though they will never set the world on fire academically, they have many family members and friends whose lives are better for having them in it.

Speaking of breaking down, I was able to hold it together for about 45 minutes at her bedside even as I watched her Cheynes-Stokes breathing the whole time. Then her PICU nurse came in when her heartrate began it's initial drop. I took one look at the nurse's face (she had started crying) and then I lost it. Then everyone in the room lost it. I always thought I would stay professional when her time came. Who knew I would end up almost running down the halls and out of the hospital sobbing. Like they say, you never know how you're going to react to a situation until it happens.

Who's to say that wasn't professional? Being professional doesn't only mean presenting a cool, calm, and collected face. Sometimes it means letting your guard down and showing how much you cared about that patient. If I were her parent, I'd be honored and blessed by your reaction and I'd take it as a measure of your devotion and committment to my child.

Think of the joy you will have someday when you see her again as she was meant to be.

Take care,

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Specializes in pedi, pedi psych,dd, school ,home health.

Briat, my love and prayres to you...I know what you mean about a special angel; but i agree with the previous poster...she has a special place in your heart forever, and you are a better nurse for caring for her...she will watch over you for the rest of your career. I have a special angel like that and i know wherever i go my KItKat is with me. I keep a picture of her in a "God grant me the serenity" frame, and it keeps me centered. Dont be afraid to cry and grieve, it makes us better nurses because we have opened ourselves up totally to care for that patient. Please take time for yourself and remeber her; and dont hesitate to go on with your career..it sounds like this is where you are meant to be! Peace; Mary

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