My patient fired me!

Nurses General Nursing

Published

message deleted.

Specializes in Rodeo Nursing (Neuro).

One thing I might have done a little differently would have been to explain that a Foley is inherently uncomfortable to many people, and that it had nothing to do with the urine in the bag. But I agree with the others that you did fine, and shouldn't let it get you down.

I'm in orientation, and I'm still pondering last Monday night, and how best to deal with The Patient Who Ate My Whole Shift. I only had two, and one of them kept me so busy that I missed a potentially serious problem with the other. It all worked out okay, but I can see this is going to be one of my hurdles.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I am NOT a nurse. I AM a patient. Those things being said to my answer.

If I had asked you about my foley and you had answered that it was fine and only a quarter full and that someone would be around to empty it every 4 hours I would have accepted it and if I had any further concerns I would have raised them.

If my IV had been "flinging about" I probably would have said something about it. I probably would have said, "I know you are busy but could you please tape this down when you get the chance?" or something to that effect. Do not worry you did everything you could. This is just a sour woman who probably would find fault with everything she could.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Some patients, especially older female patients, continue to think nurses are there to serve only them, to do any little task they happen to mention, and to do it immediately. This is probably one of those type of patients. I agree that you are so hurt because you take pride in doing a good job for your patients and for the facility. I know it is difficult to let this incident roll off your back and go on to other patients. I do think you should speak to the charge nurse, let her know your side of the story and how hurt and disappointed you were that you were not allowed to defend yourself. This will not do any good now, but at least, she knows your views on this type of behavior. Maybe next time she will come to you and discuss a situation before "firing" you.

This lady does remind me of one of my last patients, she was an alcoholic, had her boyfirend (he was 77) sneak beer into her room. I smelt it, came in, told her NO, NO, you are in need of a liver transplant, and you are drinking, I wrote an incident report, named her boyfriend as a person who needs watching when he visits, reported the whole situation to the CN, HN, physician, and her family. Guess who was written up for taking her property. Seems like the beer should have not been taken from the room. WELL, she did not need to worry, I refused to care for her again, EVER. She died, about 3 months later, never could stay sober for transplant, I refused to care for her at any time during her last hospitalization. The family was very nice to me, they wanted me taking care of her, they knew I kept my patients clean, gave meds as ordered, and called the physician when necessary. I told them I was not comfortable being her nurse, she did not feel I acted in her best interest in this earlier situation, and I was not going to place myself in that situation again. HN had no choice but to allow me to refuse to care for this patient.

Keep your head up, you did nothing wrong, this patient is probably a frequent flyer, one who lots of nurses hate to care for because she is so demanding and nasty.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Do not take this personally. Just look at it as a blessing and let her be a pain in someone else's a$$.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Utilization Management.

The scenario you describe has only happened to me less than a handful of times during my career in health care. Maybe I'm jaded, but whenever a patient has such a trivial and baseless complaint about the care that you gave, it's best to be glad you don't have to deal with her demands.

This is the patient who considers you to be her personal nurse and will, as Mike mentioned, try to monopolize your time to the extent that it could seriously jeopardize the well-being of another patient.

Prioritizing your time is the biggest challenge you'll face as a new nurse, and while these patients command your attention, as a professional you need to prioritze according to medical necessity and not to the patient's whims.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Case Mgmt; Mat/Child, Critical Care.
I feel so awful, and I know I shouldn't take it personally, but I can't help it! This was the second night I took care of this woman, and I thought I developed a decent relationship with her. I always brought her pain meds right when she asked, paged the doc when her pain meds weren't helping her...really advocated for her. The second night I had her though, she must have been in a bad mood...or something? I get in there at 8pm to see how she is doing, she mentions her foley bag, and does it need to be emptied. I say its only about 1/4 full, and the nursing assistant will be around about every 4 hours to empty it...not to worry, it wouldn't overfill. I suppose I could have emptied it right then, however it was not necessary....it was 8pm, a very busy time on the unit, I'm busy trying to check up on all of my 7 patients, do assessments on some of them, and give out meds, etc. Plus I had already delegated this task to someone else, it just wasn't priority. I also thought I explained this to her in a kind enough manner so that she would understand....apparently this pissed her off? Also, she mentioned to the charge nurse how her IV was "flinging about" and I didn't bother to tape it down "when it was obvious that should have been done"...I really don't think I'm oblivious to these things, and I never would let her be uncomfortable, how could she think that I was deliberately ignoring her needs? I was just so shocked that come 11pm she is telling my aide that she wants to talk to the charge nurse, then "tells on me", and then I have to give up care of her to the charge nurse....its so embarrassing! I'm so hurt! Its so frustrating too...does this woman have any clue that emptying her 1/4 full foley bag really does not even compare in priority to solving this patients nausea or that patients pain? Sometimes I just wish I could say that to my patients...but I know I can't.... :angryfire Has this happened to anyone? I'd like to hear some stories.....

You are probably a relatively new nurse....so please don't take this situation personally. You will more than likely have this type of thing happen again in your career. You did fine, do not beat yourself up over it...barefootlady hit the nail on the head.

Actually, the pt was lucky that the charge took over her care...many times it is simply: "I'm sorry, ma'am, there are no other nurses available to take over your care. I will discuss your concerns w/your nurse...."

Actually, unless there is gross negligence or something along those lines, I don't think these types of pt's whims s/b accomodated. :p

Up Vote Up Vote ×
One thing I might have done a little differently would have been to explain that a Foley is inherently uncomfortable to many people, and that it had nothing to do with the urine in the bag. But I agree with the others that you did fine, and shouldn't let it get you down.

I'm in orientation, and I'm still pondering last Monday night, and how best to deal with The Patient Who Ate My Whole Shift. I only had two, and one of them kept me so busy that I missed a potentially serious problem with the other. It all worked out okay, but I can see this is going to be one of my hurdles.

The patient wasn't saying that their foley was uncomfortable. She just looked at it and said "Does that need to be emptied?"

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Some patients, especially older female patients, continue to think nurses are there to serve only them, to do any little task they happen to mention, and to do it immediately. This is probably one of those type of patients.QUOTE]

Ding ding ding!!! Yes yes yes it was!!!! haha.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in ER/PDN.

Do not feel bad! I have had this happen. I had an 18-20 y/o male who had taken 100 mg of xanex. Mommy (a nurse) brought him in as an overdose. He was not cooperating and it took 2 tries to get the IV in him. Finally got in and dr says "lavage him." Ahhhhhh Maaaaaaan!!!! for those of you that don't know what lavinging involves, it involves a 30 fr OG tube and a TUm E Vac. Not Fun. Kicked mom out for that. Get that done and the blood is bad in the lab. No phlebotomy so I get to draw it. Guy moves, needle goes in too deep and mom asks for someone else to get the blood and goes and gets someone. Guy askes for another nurse. I give report to someone else. They later apologize. I never go back to them again.

Let it roll off your back like a duck.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

People are giving you good advice.

Your patient was post op? I am guessing she felt very very uncomfortable, and taking out on you was just her way of coping. Some people do that sometimes. Some people act strangely when on heavy meds when they are normally nice people in their normal lives. Being a patient in the hospital is not fun. Recovering from major surgery is painful and difficult, even with a PCA.

The majority of your patients will be nice folks, but you will get one of these now and then. Don't take it personally. :)

Up Vote Up Vote ×
I feel so awful, and I know I shouldn't take it personally, but I can't help it! This was the second night I took care of this woman, and I thought I developed a decent relationship with her. I always brought her pain meds right when she asked, paged the doc when her pain meds weren't helping her...really advocated for her. The second night I had her though, she must have been in a bad mood...or something? I get in there at 8pm to see how she is doing, she mentions her foley bag, and does it need to be emptied. I say its only about 1/4 full, and the nursing assistant will be around about every 4 hours to empty it...not to worry, it wouldn't overfill. I suppose I could have emptied it right then, however it was not necessary....it was 8pm, a very busy time on the unit, I'm busy trying to check up on all of my 7 patients, do assessments on some of them, and give out meds, etc. Plus I had already delegated this task to someone else, it just wasn't priority. I also thought I explained this to her in a kind enough manner so that she would understand....apparently this pissed her off? Also, she mentioned to the charge nurse how her IV was "flinging about" and I didn't bother to tape it down "when it was obvious that should have been done"...I really don't think I'm oblivious to these things, and I never would let her be uncomfortable, how could she think that I was deliberately ignoring her needs? I was just so shocked that come 11pm she is telling my aide that she wants to talk to the charge nurse, then "tells on me", and then I have to give up care of her to the charge nurse....its so embarrassing! I'm so hurt! Its so frustrating too...does this woman have any clue that emptying her 1/4 full foley bag really does not even compare in priority to solving this patients nausea or that patients pain? Sometimes I just wish I could say that to my patients...but I know I can't.... :angryfire Has this happened to anyone? I'd like to hear some stories.....

Don't worry about it. She may be expressing frustration or attempting to get control over her situation. She could've just focused on the foley as a potential problem even though you reassured her. Or she could just simply be a rude person.

Don't beat yourself up. You prioritized as you should instead of bending to her tyranny. You're doing just fine.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in tele, stepdown/PCU, med/surg.

I'm sorry that happened but it happens to the BEST of nurses.

I had a r/o MI guy one time for a couple days and he was the meanest old man and cantankerous (sp?) as all get out. He would always "God **** this, that." I knew I didn't like him immediately when I first when in there and he was joking about having sex with the CNA who was at THAT moment taking his vitals!! Totally unacceptable.

I gave him good care but it was difficult to walk into his room and talk to him.

Fast forward a couple weeks and he's had a CABG which he refused earlier. I have his as a patient and I walk in and he says, "Get outta here! Get me somebody else!" He wouldn't have me as his nurse. He possibly sensed that I didn't like his personality despite my trying to hide it. He also only likes female nurses. I traded him with a colleague of mine and by the end of the night he was yelling at her! Saying she was this and that.

I could take the high road and say obviously this man is scared about his surgery and he doesn't know how to cope. But generally I just say he's not a nice guy and I'm glad I don't have to be his nurse anymore.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Add a Comment