Must we all die with a feeding tube?

Nurses Safety

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Specializes in LTC,Hospice/palliative care,acute care.

Originally Posted by boxermom

"Jeb Bush is showing courage in the face of a society that wants all life to be perfect and planed. Life is a gift from God." > > Consider THIS-sometimes DEATH is a gift from GOD..... If society really wanted everything perfect and "planned" then everyone WOULD have advance directives...... Our society does not want to embrace and accept death as a natural part of life.. They want it Prettied up or hidden away... Every time I hear someone at the nursing home say" So and so's daughter (or son) will be devastated when their mom (or dad) dies " I just cringe....What do you mean "devastated" Growing up while your parents grow old and then die is the natural progression of life...It's "devastating" for a parent to loose a child-that is what Terri's parents have experienced but they are too selfish to let her out of her prision of a body.We save and continue to sustain lives simply because we have the technology to do so and we give no thought to the quality of life and the cost...Check out the website-download the videos of her......imagine your child in that condition....

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Specializes in Medical.
Did Terri Schaivo ever sign an advance directive?

I would imagine that she's like the vast majority of people, and never thought that she'd be in a situation where one would be needed.

Out of interest, how many of us, who know about what can happen, have one? All my friends and family know what I want, and I guess a valid case could be presented about my feelings from my papers for school, but I haven't managed to get around to appointing a medical power of attorney... It's on my To Do list, but that doesn't make it done!

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Specializes in LTC,Hospice/palliative care,acute care.
I would imagine that she's like the vast majority of people, and never thought that she'd be in a situation where one would be needed.

Out of interest, how many of us, who know about what can happen, have one? All my friends and family know what I want, and I guess a valid case could be presented about my feelings from my papers for school, but I haven't managed to get around to appointing a medical power of attorney... It's on my To Do list, but that doesn't make it done!

Now is as good a time as any to complete your own advance directive.There is plenty of info available right here on the 'net...You can download and print many different forms and proceed according to what your state recognizes as valid..You also can appoint someone your DPOA and complete a simple will relatively inexpensively.I did mine when I was in my early 30's.....You can also talk to your family and closest friends about your wishes..
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That was indeed my perception but, based on what I have seen here, it is probably better that Dad passed on before a tube could be inserted. I was actually trying to get the doctor to certify that he had less than six months to live (so his living will would go into effect; it said he did not want his heart restarted if it stopped) but I did not want Dad to be uncomfortable in the meantime, which I thought dehydration and lack of nutrition would cause.

I can also recall being ill and not wanting to eat anything but forcing myself to drink because I knew I needed it.

Bill: It sounds like you received a great deal of good info on this. I just want to reiterate that nurses in LTC deal with this issue a great deal also. Hospice teaches us that a 'dry death' is more comfortable than a 'wet death', & I've seen it proven many times.

We must continually educate families with all new admits, & whenever someone declines. It's amazing how many peopole do not understand advance directives.

I have a family right now that is struggling with decisions. The feeding tube was placed a few months ago, because the daughter who lives the fartherest away insisted on it. She has not been to visit her father, yet controls the decisions. The rest of the family who live nearby & visit frequently have to deal with what's happened to their father, because one person is not willing to let go. The poor resident has been in & out of the hospital so many times & has told staff he wants to die. He's a decorated war hero, & would never have wanted to survive like this. I pray that the general population will learn more about advance directives in the future. When I'm in the nursing home, my son will know better. I will also not expect staff to keep me hydrated & well-nourished, because the 'regulations' insist on it. Our state & federal regulators need to learn more about the dying journey, so they can stop policing those of us who want others to die with dignity.

I'm so glad you made a sound decision & do not have to deal with the guilt that you forced him to suffer longer. Blessings for a heart at peace, DNS

:)

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Please don't jump to conclusions before reading about Terri Schivo's case at this web site http://www.terrisfight.org/

She is a disabled person, she is not brain dead or in a vegtatative state.

Florida's legislature pasted a law, which Jeb Bush, the governer signed into law.The law replaced her feeding tube which the husband had decided to remove.

Nazi Germany's Hitler killed many groups of people including disabled people. I just want everyone to consider that death doesn't always come easily and when we have decided that, "OK, I'm ready.Take me to Heaven."

I work in a nursing home, and work with disabled people. I'm sure none of them wanted to live the end of their life there, but most of them are satisfied with their life and their families are glad the nursing home can care for them. I have had alert residents that recover and have their feeding tube removed and sometimes go home.

Quality of life is very individual, and changes. Advance directives are great, but don't throw away life either.

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Anytime someone close to you dies, it is devasting. The loss of a parent is devasting. I know, I've been there. It doesn't matter how old they are, they are still our parents. I've also comforted many families when their parents died. Yes, there is comfort in knowing they lived a good long life, or they died suddenly and didn't have to suffer long, or we were able to control their pain or that the familiy believes they are in heaven now, but it is stilll devasting, and a loss. No one has ever said, I'm glad they're dead.

Please don't judge Terri's family.She is disabled and they are there for her. Her disablity is also a loss to her and her family. She has a decreased quality of life, but everyones quality of life isn't the same. Her family decided her life was worthy of life. At what point do you say it's not a human life ? I don't believe in life at all cost either. I don't believe in mercy killing either.

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Specializes in LTC,Hospice/palliative care,acute care.

the web site terrisfight.org is maintained by her family and all of the info on it is their pov....dig a little deeper and read some of the vast material on the web .you'll see a very different case......you cannot compare the individuals' right to die with hitler-this is one way to inflame public opinion-talk about apples and oranges..... i,too work in ltc with a case mixed population.i know many developmentally disabled residents that have never been able to care for themselves and are quite content.i also see way more of the infirm that wish it would just end-lying for yr after yr with no control over their own bodies due to their dependence on others...(ps- i have also experienced the deaths of both of my parents-my dad died when i was 13 after living 6 years with cancer.my mother died when i was 34 after a 2 yr struggle with cancer.....you can't say that after watching their loved one suffer no-one had ever said they were glad it was over.if you believe that then you have no experience in hospice care and are doing your patients and their loved ones a dis-service if you don't educate yourself....my mother's loss of her husband when she was 43 and had 2 kids to raise was a relief to her after the 6 yrs of caring for him-that did not mean she loved him any less.and thankfully she worked with a team of doctors and nurses that were very passionate about hospice and noone made her feel guilty about her feelings...no-one made me feel guilty either after caring for her and watching her struggle to let go that last night and expressing a sense of relief...i also lost a baby at 6 months---now that was different...what i would call more "devastasting" do you see what i mean now? watching my mother care for my dad-watching her grown older helped me to take care of her at the end..i had accepted those life experiences and was ready to let go because i knew i did everything exactly as she wanted......i was greatly affected by both of their deaths-more so by my mom's and i miss her like hell everyday....but when i held that baby until it's heart stopped beating i thought i would die,too....i did not think i would ever get over that...don't tell me i don't know about death and loss because i am no stranger to any of it.....this just shows how different we all are-we all base our decisions on our life experiences.....as for judging anyone-i have no respect for anyone that will not let go out of selfishness or guilt.imho terri's parents maybe carry some of both.....i close friend of mine had a 19 yr old son who suffered a traumatic brain injury and lived for close to 20 yrs just like terri (at a similar level of consciousness)my friend and her husband both died before her son did....she expressed regret every day of her life for making him live like that.once the tube was in it was next to impossible to get the feedings stopped and she did not have the strength to fight.....why is it so hard to accept that others welcome a natural death? why does that have to be "throwing life away?"

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Please don't jump to conclusions before reading about Terri Schivo's case at this web site http://www.terrisfight.org/

She is a disabled person, she is not brain dead or in a vegtatative state.

Florida's legislature pasted a law, which Jeb Bush, the governer signed into law.The law replaced her feeding tube which the husband had decided to remove.

Nazi Germany's Hitler killed many groups of people including disabled people. I just want everyone to consider that death doesn't always come easily and when we have decided that, "OK, I'm ready.Take me to Heaven."

I work in a nursing home, and work with disabled people. I'm sure none of them wanted to live the end of their life there, but most of them are satisfied with their life and their families are glad the nursing home can care for them. I have had alert residents that recover and have their feeding tube removed and sometimes go home.

Quality of life is very individual, and changes. Advance directives are great, but don't throw away life either.

Boxermom: In 17 yr. of nursing, I've had ONE person who had a feeding tube who was able to wean from it & eat again. And, she had dementia, which is even more challenging. So yes, it does happen. Each case differs. However, I still say famlies need more education regarding g-tubes before they are inserted, & as nurses we should be the patient advocates & help educate so the families can make informed decisions. As one person said, the doctors dont' always help weigh the pros & cons. As the next health care providers in line, it is our responsibility to fill in the gaps. I've also seen a 65 yo woman who had a severe stroke able to walk again, with the help of our expert therapy department, as many of you have done. So there's no way to say one size fits all. Nurses need to be brave enough to help the familiy explore their options. DNS

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Specializes in cardiac ICU.
Please don't jump to conclusions before reading about Terri Schivo's case at this web site http://www.terrisfight.org/

She is a disabled person, she is not brain dead or in a vegtatative state.

Florida's legislature pasted a law, which Jeb Bush, the governer signed into law.The law replaced her feeding tube which the husband had decided to remove.

Nazi Germany's Hitler killed many groups of people including disabled people. I just want everyone to consider that death doesn't always come easily and when we have decided that, "OK, I'm ready.Take me to Heaven."

I work in a nursing home, and work with disabled people. I'm sure none of them wanted to live the end of their life there, but most of them are satisfied with their life and their families are glad the nursing home can care for them. I have had alert residents that recover and have their feeding tube removed and sometimes go home.

Quality of life is very individual, and changes. Advance directives are great, but don't throw away life either.

She has had multiple MRIs of the head--the only thing in there is fluid, as most of her brain tissue has long since atrophied. She IS in a vegetative state. She will not recover, ever. I feel sorry for everyone involved.

IMHO, that law that Jeb Bush signed was a cynical ploy for votes/support from a particular group of voters in Florida. He knew that it would never stand.

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Specializes in MS Home Health.

I have it written in NO tube feedings/NO gtubes/no artificial feedings in these documents. Hubby knows it. So does my family. I personnal am not listening to the Pope. We are worlds apart on many issues.

renerian

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I am an RN working for hospice. What we try to explain to families is that "People who are terminally ill do not die because they stop eating, they stop eating because they are dying".

This is so true. My dear father was in home hospice and he stopped wanting to eat toward the end, which I respected as the caregiver. I understood that. My younger sister used her energy projecting her rage at ME for 'not making him eat'. It was a horrid experience as my sister kept making a scene and dwelling on her own anger and helplesness, instead of letting our father die with some dignity. She did the same with our mother and it has left a huge rift between us to this day.She was the 'taker' sibling who was excessively dependant on our folks...right to the end.

We deal with the 'meme's' everywhere, who cannot accept an event in a loved one's life without relating it back to themselves excessively; whether out of guilt, frustration, dependence or whatever 'their' selfish problem may be.

I stuck by my parents...no intubation, no feeding tubes altho my sister opposed me. They both had cancer with mets. Why prolong their existance if they do not wish it so?

My sister never understood although I spent countless frustrating hours trying to help her understand. And sadly, there is often one like her in most families...which is why too many docs are afraid to let their patients go...they worry there will be one dissenting child left to sue.

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This is so true. My dear father was in home hospice and he stopped wanting to eat toward the end, which I respected as the caregiver.

No one at my father's nursing home (or his doctors) ever explained this to me. It is probably a good thing that Dad died before I could have a tube put in "to keep him from being hungry and thirsty" (as I assumed he was), especially as I was told he was "dehydrated."

On the other hand, when he was in the hospital at the beginning of his fatal illness, I had to hire private duty nurses' aides to get him fed properly. The staff did not take time with him and they finally stuck an IV tube in him. I was able to get him to take orange slices and ice cream, thus getting plenty of fluid into him. One of the aides told me that the staff had just put a tray of food in another patient's room (I am not even sure if it was in easy reach) and then took it away half an hour later when he didn't eat anything.

During the final days of my father's illness, he had a private duty aide in the nursing home for ten meals a week (breakfast and lunch) and she took plenty of time with him but she could not get him to eat toward the end.

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