Meetings?

Twoyearnurse · Oct 3, 2014

Hey! Well as you've probably read before I am a meeting-er:). My problem is both opiates and alcohol and I found my home in AA (I just related more to these folks).

Its hard to explain what I get out of it, but here is to tryin! When I was lost and broken they picked me up and have never judged me. I never get to sit in a bad mood as I consistently have my AA peers reframing my thought patterns- I have yet to have a "bad day" in this process, only bad moments that are quickly settled.

I experience on a daily basis unexplainable joy when I see how others are moved by this program and change for the better- I get to walk with them as they pick up the wreckage of their past.

When I feel down I draw from the experience of others- when I first got to the rooms there was no way anyone could be as happy as they were. I took the steps anyway and now have my very own proof it works.

The first few times I went to AA I thought everyone was bitter, complainy, and really non relatable. When I put aside my judgements I saw things way differently. These are my people.

Twoyearnurse · Oct 3, 2014

And I know it sounds stupid and you've probably heard it before: it only works if you work the steps- otherwise you won't get much out of it.

sallyrnrrt, ADN, RN · Oct 4, 2014

twoyear knocked it out of the bark:)

very well put

poppycat, ADN, BSN · Oct 4, 2014

I get serenity from going to meetings. For example, last week I had a problem with a supervisor that had me really upset. I went to a meeting & unloaded. I talked about it & cried a little and afterward I felt much calmer. The best part about it was I got great feedback from others, the best of which was "but you didn't drink".

Even when I don't speak at meetings, I almost always come away with things to think about and I always feel better.

TXRN2 · Oct 4, 2014

@ 1sttime: i totally get what you are saying- meetings & AA aren't for everybody. i did them because i had to, &, yes, i learned some useful info there, but they just aren't my cup of tea. :no:

1sttime · Oct 6, 2014

Thanks for the responses- I tend to over thing things- I think going to meetings is one of them.... I'll also admit that I tried to make contact with a sponsor- but basically I was told to do a 90/90 and call her if I felt like using. I always felt like I was missing something.

I too find some of the stories useful, but I never felt a sense of community. Im glad it works for some :)

Veronica Cheney · Oct 10, 2014

Thanks for the responses- I tend to over thing things- I think going to meetings is one of them.... I'll also admit that I tried to make contact with a sponsor- but basically I was told to do a 90/90 and call her if I felt like using. I always felt like I was missing something.
I too find some of the stories useful, but I never felt a sense of community. Im glad it works for some :)

When I first got sober I hated meetings, oh how I would sit and think about everything especially what others were saying, wearing etc. I was to busy picking everyone apart that I wasn't really listening and therefore didn't get anything out of the meetings (not saying you are doing this just sharing my experience). So finally I got a sponsor and she immediately told me the same the person told you, but she also started me on the 1st step right away, and I had to call her every day. Anyway, what helped me in the meetings initially, was to take a journal. I would then put all my focus on the journal doodling. Then I was able to listen, and I would write down phrases that I heard that touched me and then I started enjoying the meetings.

Good luck!

poppycat, ADN, BSN · Oct 10, 2014

Veronica, I know several people who journal during meetings for the same reasons you do. It helps them focus & organize their thoughts. One lady I know writes down quotes of things she hears in meetings so she won't forget something good.

skinnedknee · Oct 25, 2014

You get out what you put in... and I'm not saying that in a mean way. What I'm basically asking is, are you putting yourself really into it or just going because you have to? This is an important question to ask yourself. I've been in my program for a year and at first, I went out of fear, then I went "because I had to" now I go because I want and realize that I need to. On my bad days, these meetings are the only thing that hold me together.

Also, at NA is where I found my missing puzzle piece. What do I mean by this? I believe that all addict are missing a puzzle piece to their puzzle; meaning there is a hole somewhere that needs to be filled. This is what drugs did for me, but NA has helped me fill that void. You've been in the program for 3 years? Perhaps becoming a sponsor, if you haven't already done so, will help you feel more connected!

1sttime · Nov 4, 2014

I get a lot out of going to individual counseling sessions- I have had many aha moments. I also have some friends that I speak to on a regular basis about my recovery.

I never judge people at meetings, I never notice what anyone is wearing. Sometimes I think it could be that I don't go into the meetings with a selfish need in mind (like to unload, and Im not saying this is bad), I just feel the desire to have more of a "spiritual" uplifting meeting- instead I feel like everyone unloads and says "at least you didn't drink". This to me is counter to what I have learned in IOP and counseling, and sometimes I see my behaviors without using as just as damaging as actually picking up a drug and using...

I guess I have found what works for me- the void I have is being filled by learning acceptance of myself- and as a function of getting older...

Twoyearnurse · Nov 4, 2014

I think what you are doing is absolutely perfect! If the 12 steps of AA worked for everyone there wouldn't be counseling, treatment centers, church meetings etc. my first sponsor actually left AA for a church program and she is still doing beautifully. I get what you are saying about some meetings. I have one home group and then a couple other meetings I attend and they are really amazing about focusing on solutions rather than the problem. I've never been so spiritually fit in my life and I'm excited about continuing my journey. If you have found what works for you keep doing it! An important aspect recovery is feeling safe and having structure. It sounds like you have found both for yourself!