mea culpa

Published

Specializes in Cardiolgy.

For some time now I have planned on logging back on to this website, and immersing my self back into the http://www... but the longer I stayed away the harder I found it to come back,

But something happened today that I need to get off my chest,

I've made a drug error,

worse... I've made a CD error, for two nights running!

The day staff rang me today to say they were doing an incident form, and until that point I had no clue that I had made a mistake, some nurse I am.

The patients script stated Morphine sulphate M/R 20 mg, and we had given morphine sulphate 20mg.

I say we, not because I am trying to shift the balme, but beacuse it was duitifully double checked and signed out in the CD book, on the first night by me and the SRN, and last night by me and an EN... (So guess why it was just me that gets rang up?)

Now the patient didn't get any pain, I reckon she got 4 hours of pain relief instead of 12 hours, but she had no pain... ( we don't get CA patients very often in cardiology, and I am usually very strict about ensuring pain control and this woman had none) The day doctors have not ordered anything, just for me to be written up, with a view to stop administering medications or maybe just CDs until I get assessed again.

I just feel so guilty, the SRN who rang me up, said I should have known that I needed round tablets not square and I will know for next time, but I feel terrible, I am freezing, I feel sick, lonely and terribly guilty. I don't know how we didn't notice that the script didn't match the box.

Probably not the best time for me to come back on the internet, but I am sat here trying to decide if nursing is what I still want to do, or rather if it is safe for the patients to have me as a nurse. The reason I stayed off the net fro so long is now resolved but I will probably go back to lurking... unless I get my dream job in MacDonalds and then I'll start hanging around their forums.

I am not trying to shift the blame, it is my fault but out of three nurses involved I am the only one written up, ...blame it on the new girl I guess.

Whisper

Soon to be formerly RN, (pending my CN and Nurse Managers decision)

Specializes in RN, BSN, CHDN.

So who's job was it to order the C/D up in the first place and why hadn't the day staff obtained the C/D because it would have been very hard for night staff to obtain the C/D.

Unfortunatly it is an error but there were two trained staff checking and signing the drugs so all will be accountable.

There are several things you have to do, firstly you need to contact your union rep if it is the RCN then they have a 24hr help line, secondly you need to obtained the protocol for drug administration for your trust, and you need to obtain the codes of practice.

The RCN are the best people to advice you. Do not go to a meeting without first establishing your rights.

It is nothing to do with the doctors, your line manager will decied with the help of HR and her line manager how it will progress forward and the min that a incident form was completed then the hospital risk manager will become involved and will want t know what action needs to be taken.

Is this your first mistake?

My advice is speak to union asap

Whisper, don't be so hard on yourself. You are hardly the first nurse to make an error. Any nurse who has been practising for a while and says they've never made a mistake is either a liar or blissfully unaware. The fact that you feel so bad is evidence of how much you care about your patients. You've obviously learned from this one and will probably be more careful than any nurse out there in the future. Try not to let one mistake make you give up on nursing. We need nurses like you.

Specializes in midwifery, ophthalmics, general practice.

I agree with fergus......

you are not the first and you wont be the last to do this. The patient is fine, nothing awful happened. You will never make another drug error.

(((((((whisper))))))

Karen

Specializes in RN, BSN, CHDN.

Hey I aggree with karen and fergus but I think you should cover all bases and be ready.

It may all come to nothing but it can do no halm if you are aware of the protocols and your rights, I met some real ***ards in my time and I always do my homework.

I do not think you should be hard on your self, we have all made mistakes as we are human. You should carry on being a nurse, I know of a nurse who on a daily basis makes huges errors but never questions her ability to be a nurse!

I definitely agree with you on seeking info from the union rep Kay.

Specializes in Medical and general practice now LTC.

((((((((((((whisper))))))))))

good to see you back, was wondering how things was going for you ((((((hugs)))))

I agree with everything thats been said, you need support with this. Mistakes happen cos we are human and we do error. meet this as a learning curve and I promise you will learn from this. You are not alone on this remember that 2 of you signed this so all are accountable not just you, so if the others aren't getting written up about this I would really question why and get the union involved

Specializes in Cardiolgy.

Well after a full nights sleep, the situation doesn't seem quite as bad, Now it is just 'end of the world bad' instead of 'rot in hell forever bad'

I just wanted to take this post to say thankyou all for responding, I haven't been on this site, or the internet as a whole for just over nine months

But a lot has happened I qualified, and started work, and I don't I was any where near prepared, I still feel like my head is whirling from being in at the deep end- and that uni did not prepare me for this.

and as to whether this is my first mistake, no

I am begining to think that I made that nearly four years ago... But I do love my job, I am just scared now to go back to work, I have two doubles this weekend (this week is my 45 hour week) before I have to speak to the sister and I don't want to go in.

Patients should only have to worry about getting better, and maybe the state of the food but not worry about whether the nurses are going to hurt them.

I just wanted to say thankyou, thankyou for the advice and having the compassion to respond to this thread when I have been absent for so long

Specializes in midwifery, ophthalmics, general practice.

you did not make a mistake... you are an excellent nurse.

the problem lies in the way the training is run. when I trained- back in the dark ages- we were left in charge of wards from the second year. we worked our tails off but we went through all the angst you are now going through- except we did it at 18/12 into training. as students we knew that 18/12 was the crucial time.. if you survived that, you would survive to the end. We knew exactly what it was like and what we were letting ourselves in for. ok, there was a high drop out at 18/12 but because we were in training we saw each other through the bad moments ( I had rather a lot of sick time then!) Now.. you hit it about 6mth to a year after qualifying... and there is no support network of students to keep you going.

so talk to us... we know what you're going through. been there done that........... maybe one day I'll tell about how I was utterly convinced I'd killed a patient........turns out I hadnt but I was too junior to understand and had a bad few months.... long story! moral.. dont start your training on an oncology ward!

take care

Karen

Specializes in Cardiolgy.

You are right I definately was not prepared for being in charge of a ward, My first set of nights were terrible, I was okay until the other RN went for her break, and it hit me, I was in charge and responsible for 32 patients on an acute ward with some TLC patients.

I must have walked around the beds over a hundred times, just to keep checking! If some one lost a telemetry lead, I shot out of my seat as if they had lost their heart rate!

Still, if anyone has any spare change since their AoC pay rise, (lol) buy shares in a chocolate company, the amount I am going to eat before Tuesday will certainly raise their profts.... I need a cheaper and healthier coping mechanism!

I say we, not because I am trying to shift the balme, but beacuse it was duitifully double checked and signed out in the CD book, on the first night by me and the SRN, and last night by me and an EN...

just a quick point u said checked by a SRN and an EN....are they still inforce? sorry for my ignorance but shouldnt they be RN'S, especially the EN, didnt think they existed anymore. Can they check CD's?

Anyway from what i have read from the posts you have done in the past you are a good nurse and i agree with everything people said. Dont give up nursing, we are only human, errors are made. take care now x x

Specializes in midwifery, ophthalmics, general practice.
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Still, if anyone has any spare change since their AoC pay rise, (lol) buy shares in a chocolate company, the amount I am going to eat before Tuesday will certainly raise their profts.... I need a cheaper and healthier coping mechanism!

what AfC pay rise............... never happened out here in general practice!!!

alcohol used to be our coping mechanism.......... not chocolate!! our version of clinical support/supervision was to go down the pub... sink a few beers and compare notes on the day... and sympathise with each other over the awful things we had done!!! a friend of mine did much the same as you... she went and sat outside matrons room to confess her sins.. was listened to and sent back to work.. told she'd never make that error again. she had managed to give completely the wrong drugs to a patient.

karen

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