L&D nurse is calling formula poison!!!

[hotmama2be]

Ok this post I know will open a whole big nasty can of worms but I need opinions and the truth . So here it goes I gave birth to my beautiful daughter on 6/17/08 I decided to breast feed via pumping and bottling it for the baby , she was not able to latch and get enough out of my breasts. My mother happens to be a L&D nurse, and she is all for breastfeeding , formula she has said is poison and her hospital she says does not even carry or promote formula because they consider it to harmful to babys health they even give out handouts via the la leche league warning mothers of formula. Well unfornunately my milk has run dry, due to the fact I am going to school and unable to pump while at school so my milk was and still is diminshing. So I had to supplement the breastmilk with formula . Well I decided to not tell my mother about the change for obvious reasons since she is so pro breastmilk etc. Well she babysits on Saturdays for me ( while I'm at school), she calls me up and says OMG I can't believe you are giving her formula shame on YOU!!!!! Then she hangs up and we do not talk for a good 3 days. She has told me I am a horrible mother and I am feeding my baby poison, and that my baby will not be smart as she could have been if she remained on breastmilk. So why is everybody so touchy about breastmilk and formula, I think nurses should educate mothers on options not forcing there personal preferences on the patients or the general public it is ultimately the mothers decision which should be respected. FYI I am a pre nursing student and have been watching for any signs of what my mom has called poison aka formula , my baby is doing FINE on formula

[Penguin67]

There are two definite schools of thought on infant feeding methods. ONe is that breastfeeding is the only way to go. (Some at my hospital call these folks the "nipple nazis", as they won't even come to professional meetings if a formula company sponsors it, and they make comments that formula companies can advertise but it's a shame that breastfeeding doesn't get advertising.)

The other school is that formula is fine, an acceptable way to feed.

I've see many new moms scared to do anything except breastfeed in the hospital due to the strong nature of the lactation consultant. They switch to formula as soon as they go home. (I've seen many in the grocery stores and at the mall with formula.)

I had an interesting conversation with a lactation consultant a few years ago. She was telling me the list of wonderfuls about breastfeeding. I countered by saying that I was successful in school (earned my doctorate in nursing 8 years ago), have my own house and consider myself fairly successful. Her response? "Just imagine whay you could have been if your mom had breastfed you!"

I tell my nursing students not to get into the method of feeding. Don't be judgmental at all. Give the parents information about both methods and let them make an informed decision that is right for them.

My opinion? If you are feeding your baby, you are doing great. If you are not feeding your baby, well, that is child abuse. Whatever method you choose is your choice and no one should dictate that to you. :twocents:

[visiting]

Surely your mother has met mothers who have physical problems that prevent them from breastfeeding and I wonder what she thinks they should do. There has to be options.

I wonder if you mother would approve the WAP formula (scroll down to Feeding Babies & Children) - the babies on that site look healthy enough.

http://www.westonaprice.org/children/index.html

[RNmama05]

I think the fact that she is an L&D nurse is beside the point. She is an annoying, intrusive mother first and foremost.

[MassED, BSN, RN]

you breastfed as long as you could, now you're on the formula. They are better now than ever (formula) - your mom needs to relax and give you a break, and knock that crap off. It is NOT poison.

[JeannaRN]

Your mother is way off base and with such a judgeMENTAL attitude she must be one awful L and D nurse. Our nurses have the same approach as the above posters, who all gave you excellent advice.

What does your "mother" suggest you feed your infant since your milk dried up?? Does she expect you to hire a wet nurse??

[rph3664]

I'm so sorry that you are going through this conflict.

Contrary to some well-meaning people's beliefs, formula is NOT poison. I'm of the biggest BF advocates you may ever see, but what happens when mom's milk does not come in to begin with? What if mom got pregnant after say, a double mastectomy? What are you gonna do? Starve your child? Of course not. You feed your baby whatever means possible.

I was so disappointed after what seemed like moving the sun and moon to get my milk to come in, all to no avail. I really wanted to BF my baby, but couldn't. I gave her what I could and had to stop because well, I was driving myself crazy trying to do what nature obviously would not do.

Needless to say, she is a happy and healthy nearly 10 month old baby and thriving on formula.

Don't beat yourself up over it.

I'm just curious what your mom would say to situations in which BF'ing is not possible. I hope she wouldn't starve a baby for her beliefs.

BTW, breastmilk is best and blah blah blah, but as I said, there are some situations in which it's not possible.

I do believe that getting colostrum is the most important thing, much more so than BFing for, say, 3 or 6 months.

My friend's wife never produced enough milk to exclusively breastfeed any of their three children, so they decided, "If we have to give bottles, let's just go ahead and do it that way."

Not just women who gave birth after a double mastectomy (the actress Ann Jillian did this :) ) but adopted babies, babies whose mother died, etc. People don't need wet nurses any more, and I was shocked to find out that banked breast milk costs about $5 an ounce!

p.s. My sister is 37, and I remember my mother making her baby formula. Nowadays, that really isn't recommended because some micronutrients have been found in BM that aren't in that evaporated milk/Karo syrup formula, or in goat's milk which can also be used for this purpose, BUT it will do in a pinch.

[hotmama2be]

Thank you all for responding I feel that all your input really was encouraging, my mom is slowly coming around to the idea but she said, she will never be the same whatever that means. My baby girl is thriving and doing very fine !!!!!

[JeannaRN]

Of course your baby is doing fine!! You are a good Mom.

La Leche will never convince me that all the prisons and special needs classes are filled with people who were bottle fed. That is what they try to make it sound like with their formula is poison crapola.

[Jolie, BSN]

...my mom is slowly coming around to the idea but she said, she will never be the same whatever that means. My baby girl is thriving and doing very fine !!!!!

I think that means your mom is a bit of a Drama Queen. (Faint) :)

[NotReady4PrimeTime, RN]

Infant formula has been improved so much by the addition of AHA and DHA omega 3 supplementation to reduce some of the differences in effect between breastmilk and formula on the developing brain. The biggest difference nowadays is that formula has no immune system benefits.

Years ago I worked in a place where many families lived in remote isolated communities where groceries have to be flown in. Formula costs three to five times more there than in the southern communities and most people are on public assistance. They feed their babies Carnation evaporated milk mixed with brown sugar. When they do have formula they often-dilute it to make it go farther. Their babies are not in the best of health.

I breastfed all of my children at least for a time. When my eldest daughter was a baby, our family pediatrician was an old-school Brit who had some interesting ideas. When the breastfeeding failed at three months, she told me to feed her 2% milk... I was a 21 year old uneducated girl who didn't know any better, so that's what I did. My daughter? She's a PhD candidate at one of the top universities in the world with several important genetics discoveries to her credit. Her intelligence is just fine!

[lupin]

I was a bottle fed baby and while I'm not the smartest or richest person by far I don't think I turned out too badly. I fed my son breast milk and supplemented formula for the first two weeks of life, but I didn't rest enough, hit the baby blues HARD, didn't drink enough water, and at the end of two weeks had to switch to formula because I ran out of milk. I swear I did everything but stand on my head and spin to get milk out but I'm just not a big dairy supplier. That stressed me out even more and perpetuated the cycle.

My child is four pounds heavier than when he was born 8 weeks ago, smiles occasionally, can turn his head to listen for mine or my husband's voice, loves to stare right at my eyes, and has started cooing so sweetly I wish I could tape record it. From what I read in the parenting books he is pretty much on par with where he should be developmentally. While I still wish I could have breastfed him, I don't feel he is starving by any means.

[mugwump]

OK the smart ass part of me wants to tell you to show up to your mothers on saturday baby in tow and no bottles say "your right mom I was poisening my child and since I have no milk and formula is poison I have decided not to feed him my milk is dried up and no formula for him so I have decided to starve my child" turn around and leave.

From personal experience I wanted to breastfeed my child we were hospitalized at 5 weeks for failure to thrive she lost 10 ounces from birth when she should have gained a pound or two. I was litterally starving her to death by breast feeding her. needless to say she was bottle fed