Kids say the darnest things....

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Had a child to come to my office holding his pinky finger up in a bent position at the joint so I asked him what's wrong did you jam your finger on the ball he said no my grandpa has arthritis in his big toe and my mom told me that I inherited the arthritis from grandpa and it's in my finger he also said my mom wants you to call her if I had any pain :(:saint: ok well here's some ice:nurse: back to class you go

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Specializes in Pediatrics, Community Health, School Health.

I had a kid come into to my office asking for "Hanitizer" so he wouldn't spread germs (hand sanitizer) :laugh:

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Specializes in Cardiology, School Nursing, General.

I had a kid come in and start talking about his dad's member and that his doctor was checking his balls when he went to the doctor and he's scared I'll do the same thing because his dad was in pain when he did that. I just looked at him and with the biggest poker face... "Really? That's interesting" But when he left... :roflmao:(Kinder)

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Specializes in school nursing.

Me: "What's happening hot stuff?"

First Grader: "I'm not here because I'm hot, I'm here because my ear hurts!!!!" **rolls eyes at silly school nurse who knows nothing**

Bear in mind this is the 6 yr old girl that calls me "Missy" when she comes to see me....

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I had a kid come into to my office asking for "Hanitizer" so he wouldn't spread germs (hand sanitizer) :laugh:

I have a little here that says "Hanitizer" too! so cute!

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Specializes in school nurse.
Me: "What's happening hot stuff?"

First Grader: "I'm not here because I'm hot, I'm here because my ear hurts!!!!" **rolls eyes at silly school nurse who knows nothing**

Bear in mind this is the 6 yr old girl that calls me "Missy" when she comes to see me....

I keep a clapboard (the thing they use in movies to start scenes) and hit it saying "good manners take two" when they're disrespectful. (It also involves leaving the room and coming back in for a "reset".)

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Specializes in school nursing.
I keep a clapboard (the thing they use in movies to start scenes) and hit it saying "good manners take two" when they're disrespectful

STEALING. THIS. :roflmao:

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Specializes in school nurse.
STEALING. THIS. :roflmao:

...I ordered it on Amazon.

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Specializes in Cardiology, School Nursing, General.

Another student came in and told me about his birthday and how awesome it's going to be. I'm like why? He said because his birthday will be at Hooter's and the pretty ladies will bring him an awesome cake again! :roflmao:

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Specializes in CVICU, SchoolRN, MICU, PCU/IMU, ED.

OMG, my 5yo calls it hanitizer too! Makes me laugh every time I hear her say it.

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Specializes in School Nursing, Hospice,Med-Surg.

My fave from this year:

A 1st grader comes in with his underwear wrapped up in a paper towel and says, "Nurse K, ya know that thing on the wall that's not a toilet?"

"A urinal?"

"Yeah! I was peeing on the urinal and I tooted then poop shooted out my butt."

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Today, a teacher called to tell me that they were sending a 1st grader down and that he had been in the restroom 6 times in the past hour. When he got to my office, he said his stomach really hurt and he needed to use the restroom again. I asked if he was pooping every time he was in the restroom and he looked me like I had 6 heads and said "We don't talk about poop, it's impolite!"

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