just sitting here confused

Nurses General Nursing

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Specializes in Gerontological Nursing, Acute Rehab.

Hi everyone! I'm new to this site, but everyone seems so supportive I'd thought I'd write about my situation and see if anyone could give me advice.

Ever since I was in nursing school (almost 9 years now) I had wanted to be a Maternity nurse. I would read my maternity book just for fun. I absolutely loved it. However, when I graduated back in 1995, you were lucky to get a job, let alone one in your preferred field. I started in LTC and continued in that field, along with skilled and sub acute, to this day.

Fast forward to now! I was offered a job in a large community hospital that did 3000+ births a year. I couldn't believe that I was finally in maternity. I should have been excited, but for some reason I wasn't. I don't know if it was the fact that I'd have to be in training for at least 4 months full time (I have 3 little ones at home, so I've been working part time or weekend for several years now), or if it was the fact that I'd be dealing with a lot of drug babies and very young moms (the hospital was in a high drug use area). Needless to say, I didn't take the job. For some reason it didn't feel right for me to take it, but now I wonder if that was my only chance.

I love geriatric nursing, and I feel that it's an underrated field. Unfortunately, society thinks that all we do is pop pills and fluff pillows (remember the ER episode?) I'm just so confused, I don't know why I didn't jump at the chance to take that job, and now I'm wondering if I really want to get into Maternity as much as I thought I did.

I guess my problem is that I found out through a lot of soul searching and research that Maternity may not be the place for me. It's just hard to grasp after wishing for it for over 8 years.

Thanks for letting me vent. I don't know if it makes much sense, but I'd appreciate any feedback.

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Your story brings to mind one of my favorite quotations by one of my favorite authors:

"Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have got it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known."

Garrison Keillor

Sounds like maybe you were intended to be in geriatric nursing all along. But don't give up completely on the Maternal nursing, if you truly love that too--maybe your opportunity just hasn't come yet!

Good luck, and kudos to a geriatric nurse from an ER nurse--much as I love our elders, I don't think I could do your job full time!

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Specializes in ICU, CM, Geriatrics, Management.

I say: trust your gut and your inner voice.

And remember that as humans we're always evolving. What you were a while back, changes over time.

So excel in geriatric!

All the best to ya!

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Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

Sounds as if the answers are before you. Just need to listen to them. DO what you feel is best, you rarely go wrong following your heart.

do i sound like a fortune cookie or what???

lol. best wishes, hon.

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You said it was 9 years ago. We change. We grow. Interest change. You have learned to value other areas of nurnsing. And you insights that you did not have 9 years ago about yourself and nursing.

Your situation has changed you have family concerns that you did not have then.

Don't beat yourself up over doing what you know to be right for your today.

You are not the same person, nor liveing the same life you did back then.

Even if you continue to read your Ob books for fun you now understand that it is not the field for you. You can love certain aspects and not love it all. You can love or long for something and yet understand that in reality it is not right for you.

It sounds like this is an old lover for you. You fell in love or had a crush. Then because of cercumstance you married LTC. It's been 9 years. You have grown to love LTC even more.

You had a chance meeting with your old love OB. And you are wistful but you realize that OB started taking drugs over the past few years. His life is not the rosey picutre you had of him. It is sad but you would not give up DH for him today and you realize in the end you got the better man.

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Specializes in ICU, CM, Geriatrics, Management.

Agnus -- Nice analogy, dude! Right on!

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Specializes in Med-Surg, Trauma, Ortho, Neuro, Cardiac.

Makes perfect sense. As has been said, follow your heart.

If it's fear of change, fear of getting out of your comfort zone, that will be revealed.

If in fact for some reason you have been truly lead to where you belong, you will know that too.

Best wishes.

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You have to listen to your heart and your gut.

Don't think for a moment that this will be your only chance for OB.

It sounds like you are still interested but this wasn't the right job and wasn't the right time.

Ask yourself, if my children were older and I wasn't needed at home would I be interested in this job.

Ask yourself if this were a smaller unit with a different clientelle would I be interested in this job.

Just because you are devoted to your children right now and not thrilled about working with drug addicted maternity patients doesn't necessarily mean that you are destined to never work with OB patients.

Now if you ask yourself these questions and come to the conclusion that it was in fact a passing interest and what you really trully love is geriatrics there is no shame in that either.

It takes a very special kind of person to work with the elderly. Geriatric nurses are extremely important and often under appreciated. Be proud of yourself and your vocation you are doing a great service to mankind regardless of which field of nursing you are in.

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Specializes in Everything but psych!.

You listened to your heart and your present life. Years ago it was right for you. Both you and OB changed in the last almost decade. You grew apart. As long as you feel happy with what you're doing, you made the right decision.:kiss

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I know how you feel!!.....when I graduated in 1997.....all I wanted was to work OB and then eventually go back to school to become a midwife, it was my dream!!....but at that time I was told that I needed a year or two of basic med surg first....so I did that, and I hated it the whole time......then I put in apps again for OB, at that time there were NO openings, so in the mean time I worked a year in ICU, it was fun but still not what I wanted...put in apps again, still no openings.....then went to home healthnursing, it was OK but still not the "right fit" for me....OB-still no openings.....then I went to work in an office, internal medicine....BINGO!!!!!....it is by far the best job I've ever had!!....I get up in the morning and am excited to go to work, I love my patients and the fact that I get to know them over a life time instead of just a few days.....I like being the one a patient calls cuz they have faith in me to help them.....about six months into the job I got a call from the manager of OB at our hospital offering me a job!!......That's when I REALLY realized how much I loved my job, cuz I thought I had always wanted to work OB but had no desire to leave my dream job!!......so, I stayed and am sooo glad that I did!!.....Now, office nursing has a "rep" like LTC, "office nurses aren't really nurses, they just read magazines all day and don't do anything."....I've heard it sooo many times but, if I don't do or know anything, then how come the hosp. and home health nurses are callin' me everytime they don't know what to do with one of our patients???.......I applaud your commitment to LTC, it takes a special nurse to do that job for a long period of time, I couldn't......My point is that each of us has to find the right "fit" and we all excell in different areas of nursing, and none of us are lesser nurses because we're not working in a trauma unit all the time......we have to support eachother, no matter what field we're in......If you LTC "does it for ya" then stick with it!!

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Specializes in Gerontological Nursing, Acute Rehab.

I just wanted to thank everyone that posted for their kind words and support. It helps to hear from other nurses who may know what I was going through!

I feel more comfortable with my decision and I know that geriatrics is where I'm meant to be right now. Who knows what the future will bring when I'm able to devote more time to my career.

By the way, when I got my old job back I got a position where I won't have to work weekends....so it turned out to be even better! And it felt good to know that they were happy to have me back.

Thanks again for all your support....I'm so glad I found this site!!!

Jennifer

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Congrats!!....I'm glad its all working out well for you!!

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