Just an observation (Clinical Tales of Woe)

Published

Been coming here for a while now, since long before I began nursing school, and notice a constant reoccurring theme. "Why are nurses so mean to students?" and various other related threads.

Some people get upset with clinical nurses "They are just so mean! If this is how nurses are, I want no part of it!" Let's dissect this type of statement. Does one mean nurse, or even a floor full of mean nurses, imply that nurses in general are jaded, mean, rude or obnoxious? No. To me, it implies that they are people. No more, no less. People have both good days and bad ones. We try our best to forgive our patients of their rudeness because we like to assume it's disease related anxiety.

What about the nurse treating all of the rude, highly anxious patients? Think she or he might experience a little residual angst over the matter? After all, this is a high-stress occupation. No one that I've ever met in school states that "I wanted to be a nurse because it's such an easy, low stress job to have. Every day goes smooth as silk and there are just very few occupational hazards. Doctors are so nice and patients are always so easy to deal with!" Does this mean you should excuse the behavior of a nurse who is acting in such a way and write it off as a consequence of the job? Not necessarily. But perhaps a little leeway here is warranted.

Maybe these 'bad' nurses suffer from "Mother Syndrome" where they've taken on the health of the world, and ignored their own leaving them with little to give to anyone else (and they need a vacation!). Maybe they're in a mood because they had their overtime taken away, the overtime that puts food on the table in a down economy for some nurses, and that has them high strung. Perhaps they need to seek therapy of their own? Or, maybe they're just rude PEOPLE in general and nursing is what their profession happens to be... lol. Either way, it's pretty drastic to think that a few bad nurses make for an entire world of bad nurses as a whole. If the problem is really as terrible as some here have described it, well my goodness - Take that up with your dean of nursing or charge nurse on the floor. Don't just vent it off on a website if it's REALLY that bad. Tell someone. We are designated reporters of abuse, after all :D

Wow, this got really long, really fast. In summary - Take a deep breath. Apply some therapeutic communication with the nurse giving you a hard time (unless they appear ready to dive over the deep end, in which case maybe leave them alone... lol). "You seem upset. Is there anything I can do to help?" Basically, just apply those critical thinking skills to your coworkers as much as you do to patients. If that doesn't work, tell someone. A lot of people are pretty stressed out these days. If not over money, then something else. But don't let a few people who are stressed to the max and taking it out in their own, albeit bad way, detour you from your goal of becoming the best nurse YOU want to be.

Now I sound preachy and sanctimonious. :eek: Time to stop! Best of luck to all my fellow nursing students! Don't let anything, or anyone, get in your way or get you down. If this is what you want to do, stick with it!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.

what a concept . . . nurses are people, too and might be stressed out from something that has nothing to do with a student!

that's what i've been saying for years.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in LTC.
what a concept . . . nurses are people, too and might be stressed out from something that has nothing to do with a student!

that's what i've been saying for years.

agreed. ;)

some students don't know what a nurse can be going through. its' hard to maintain a bubbly personality 24/7 with the stress of work and home life. i manage to do so , however i do have my mini breakdowns at home. people are just people. we both as nurses and student nurses have to give each other a break.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Thank you both :)

I could just be lucky. Honestly I haven't had any problems with school instructors or nurses at my clinical site. Though, I have heard from other students at other places that the nurses they were asked to work with were less than pleasant.

Guess for me I just see it differently than some people do. I mean yes, most people go into this profession because on some level they care about people. But to elevate yourself to the level of "I would never be this way to a student!" is a little unreasonable. Perhaps after graduation and some real life experience it'll hit home that what you wanted to be roses and daisies can be that way, but it also comes with a whole bunch of manure :bugeyes:

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Labor and Delivery.
what a concept . . . nurses are people, too and might be stressed out from something that has nothing to do with a student!

that's what i've been saying for years.

yes, except it would have went over much better had you only said just that and not done the exact same thing by grouping together all students in a negative way because of course no students could ever be under stress too...:uhoh3:

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Yes, except it would have went over much better had you only said just that and not done the exact same thing by grouping together all students in a negative way because of course no students could ever be under stress too...:uhoh3:

Ahh yes! The grim truth! Students are people experiencing stress, and so are nurses! So let's stop fighting it out on here and having this battle and try to seriously work together to accept that. Some people won't ever change. Rude people are just rude, sometimes they don't even do it on purpose lol... I have a terrific sense of humor, but it may come off to others as though I don't care, which couldn't be further from the truth.

I'm not suggesting we have a group hug or anything :eek:, just try to accept each other for who we all are. Just people trying to make it in this world. It isn't easy as it is, so lets not make it any harder on each other than we have to by placing unreasonable "Nurses should be kind and loving and perfect people pleasers every second of everyday," nonsense. That just isn't going to happen.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Labor and Delivery.
Thank you both :)

I could just be lucky. Honestly I haven't had any problems with school instructors or nurses at my clinical site. Though, I have heard from other students at other places that the nurses they were asked to work with were less than pleasant.

Guess for me I just see it differently than some people do. I mean yes, most people go into this profession because on some level they care about people. But to elevate yourself to the level of "I would never be this way to a student!" is a little unreasonable. Perhaps after graduation and some real life experience it'll hit home that what you wanted to be roses and daisies can be that way, but it also comes with a whole bunch of manure :bugeyes:

I ahve to reply to this. I am generally a happy and positive person and yes I chose nursing because I wanted a job that I felt was contributing to society in a way that I would possibly be able to do well. No, taht doesn't at all mean I feel nursing is full of rainbows and kittens, it just means I'm going to go into positive and to anyone that says "I'm not going to be this or that kind of nurse" good for them to want to be the best they can be. For a profession that does seem to take an obvious toll on one it seems almost necessary to go into with that kind of attitude. I'm sure reality will set in for everyone in time, it shouldn't be looked down on to be idealistic.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

No, I totally agree. Idealism is a great thing. It gives everyone something to strive to be. Just don't hold other people that you don't know, or know what they're going through, to your own personal standards is all I was really getting at.

I want everyone to be the best they can be. Changing other peoples attitude is a battle most people will lose at though. It has to come from within.

FWIW: I'm almost always full of rainbows and kittens :) Though some days it gets rainy around me. Take it in stride.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Public Health.

EXACTLY! :yeah:

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Critical Care, Emergency Medicine, Flight.

i have yet to get my head bitten off by a nurse.. & if i do id rat their @SS out for it anyways. lol

but really, when they disrespect you whether its personal or not, its lateral violence and is unacceptable.

if your having a bad day, at home or on the unit, check it at the door, bc the sorry @$$ attitude does nothing for you, your patients or general morale..

:) yay. now lets all get along hug it out and do what we came here to do...help our patients :)

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Yes, except it would have went over much better had you only said just that and not done the exact same thing by grouping together all students in a negative way because of course no students could ever be under stress too...:uhoh3:

I did not see anything negative in her grouping of students. The only remark I read was that a student might not have anything to do with the stress the nurse was under.

There are lots of explanations on both sides. Truthfully I have met my share of snot nosed students who seem to think they know everything. I have also met my share of crusty old nurses who have not kept up and try to belittle students and new nurses whenever they can. There is enough blame to get all comers. No one has to come out swinging.

The OP has suggested that students use what they are learning in an area of need. Practice those skills whenever you can. As a student you have limited time with some interactions. Make use of all possible ones.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Of course lateral violence is bad. Treating people like crap doesn't require a professional title though. I'm sure there are instances of students doing / saying things to nurses they are working under while in clinicals that are atrocious. I'd wager there are more frequent incidents of nurses mistreating the student, but no matter which side it's coming from that doesn't make it right.

High stress job. Just wish we could all give each other the benefit of the doubt that it's a bad day or there is something else going on aside from the student. I used to work with a woman who was pretty rude to people sometimes and she didn't even realize the cut her tongue had. One day a newer person at work said something to her about it and it actually made the rude lady cry. She really just wasn't aware that the newer girl looked up to her so much, and that she had really hurt her in the way she did. The rude lady was more or less preening her feathers for all to see, and not giving any foresight to the consequence of who she hurt in the process. It changed a bit after that, but she had her moments; no one is perfect all the time.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion