Is this normal for a Dr.?

hotnurse · Mar 15, 2005

You are interpreting it correctly. :uhoh21:

VeryPlainJane · Mar 15, 2005

Also, would it be weird for him to tell her what great hair she has and proceed to touch her hair (while standing about 3 inches from her face!)?

I bet the weirdo didn't even wash his hands! lol

LPNer · Mar 15, 2005

Hello everyone! I don't post very often but I am learning so much from these message boards! I will graduate from nursing school this summer. And yes, it still feels like an eternity. I have a question and I'd really like to hear your opinions from a nursing point of view and from a mom's view, for those of you with children. Ok, you have a young mom (29) and a young male pediatrician (33), both married. The Dr. spends a lot of time in the room with this mom. Do you think it's strange for the doc to compliment the mom everytime she is there? For example, telling her how funny, smart, pretty, she is. Also, would it be weird for him to tell her what great hair she has and proceed to touch her hair (while standing about 3 inches from her face!)? Have you ever seen this kind of thing and is this normal behavior for young docs? opinions please.........By the way, I work in pediatrics. Thanks! :uhoh21:

sounds like this guy is more than the kids' pediatrician, or wants to be! I'd stay clear of the whole thing!

webblarsk · Mar 15, 2005

Sound inappropriate to me!

steelcityrn, RN · Mar 15, 2005

Some ppl like the attention...hotnurse

Hello everyone! I don't post very often but I am learning so much from these message boards! I will graduate from nursing school this summer. And yes, it still feels like an eternity. I have a question and I'd really like to hear your opinions from a nursing point of view and from a mom's view, for those of you with children. Ok, you have a young mom (29) and a young male pediatrician (33), both married. The Dr. spends a lot of time in the room with this mom. Do you think it's strange for the doc to compliment the mom everytime she is there? For example, telling her how funny, smart, pretty, she is. Also, would it be weird for him to tell her what great hair she has and proceed to touch her hair (while standing about 3 inches from her face!)? Have you ever seen this kind of thing and is this normal behavior for young docs? opinions please.........By the way, I work in pediatrics. Thanks! :uhoh21:

hotnurse · Mar 15, 2005

It sounds as if you are blaming this situation on the mom. You are probably right. I forgot that ALL doctors are PERFECT. How could I forget that? Forgive me if I misunderstood your post.

Soleilpie · Mar 15, 2005

It sounds as if you are blaming this situation on the mom. You are probably right. I forgot that ALL doctors are PERFECT. How could I forget that? Forgive me if I misunderstood your post.

Sounds like she's more concerned about the doctor. She's asking whether this is odd behavior on the doctor's part.

CHATSDALE · Mar 15, 2005

once where i worked we had this very pretty young nurse with a bubbly personality...we were sitting in the nurses station when this very reserved middle aged doctor came in to about his pt who was going to have surgery that am...

suddenly he started laughing [i didn't even know he knew how to laugh] joking around...asking her about the pt...she said it wasn't one of her assignment but that she would get the other nurse

no no you just show me how to find the info in the chart.....

the surgeron came in to station while all this was going on...he just stood there with an open mouth...

when the md saw the surgeron he changed to professional like someone had flipped a switch

after they had left she turned to me and asked 'was he hitting on me'

oh yeah

prmenrs, RN · Mar 15, 2005

Find another pediatrician--leave this loser, pronto.

Cherish · Mar 15, 2005

LOL, as females we usually can tell if someone is flirting with us, males are usually the ones who are more 'dense' on that. BUT this doctor is MARRIED, it may be ok to flirt, everyone does, BUT that was unprofessional being that he was seeing his patient. It's not like you bumped into him on the street and he was flirting with you or whoever you were talking about. But the touching of the hair, that would be extreme and uncomfortable. Wonder why that PERSON didn't say anything about that, unless they didn't feel uncomfortable???:stone

once where i worked we had this very pretty young nurse with a bubbly personality...we were sitting in the nurses station when this very reserved middle aged doctor came in to about his pt who was going to have surgery that am...
suddenly he started laughing [i didn't even know he knew how to laugh] joking around...asking her about the pt...she said it wasn't one of her assignment but that she would get the other nurse
no no you just show me how to find the info in the chart.....
the surgeron came in to station while all this was going on...he just stood there with an open mouth...
when the md saw the surgeron he changed to professional like someone had flipped a switch
after they had left she turned to me and asked 'was he hitting on me'
oh yeah

hotnurse · Mar 15, 2005

hello everyone. ok, it seems that you guys think this behavior is weird too. at the time of this particular visit (the "touching") we had been seeing this pediatrician for over a year. he had always been very casual, very friendly, very complimentary, moreso than with the other moms (the walls there are quite thin!). i thought maybe it was just because our ages were pretty close. i tried not to think it through too much. but, on this particular day, he just seemed to lose all composure. he stood there looking at me for like 5 minutes before saying hello, and then turns and just walks out the door! it only got weirder from there. at one point he told my two year old that "there were a lot of good things to get from her mom" that was definitely weird. its not like she understood what he was saying to her!! i thought about it for awhile, trying to make sense of it, but nothing made sense. unfortunately, this man is a great dr. and my children love him. of course my instincts told me that this could be a bad situation, but i tend to doubt myself. i just needed to hear from other women (or men) on this one. oh, and in response to one of the other posters, i would have reported this behavior had i realized that it was so inappropriate. not that anything would have been done about it.........after all, he is a doctor. :madface: thanks for your help.

lol, as females we usually can tell if someone is flirting with us, males are usually the ones who are more 'dense' on that. but this doctor is married, it may be ok to flirt, everyone does, but that was unprofessional being that he was seeing his patient. it's not like you bumped into him on the street and he was flirting with you or whoever you were talking about. but the touching of the hair, that would be extreme and uncomfortable. wonder why that person didn't say anything about that, unless they didn't feel uncomfortable???:stone

directcare4me · Mar 15, 2005

hello everyone. ok, it seems that you guys think this behavior is weird too. at the time of this particular visit (the "touching") we had been seeing this pediatrician for over a year. he had always been very casual, very friendly, very complimentary, moreso than with the other moms (the walls there are quite thin!). i thought maybe it was just because our ages were pretty close. i tried not to think it through too much. but, on this particular day, he just seemed to lose all composure. he stood there looking at me for like 5 minutes before saying hello, and then turns and just walks out the door! it only got weirder from there. at one point he told my two year old that "there were a lot of good things to get from her mom" that was definitely weird. its not like she understood what he was saying to her!! i thought about it for awhile, trying to make sense of it, but nothing made sense. unfortunately, this man is a great dr. and my children love him. of course my instincts told me that this could be a bad situation, but i tend to doubt myself. i just needed to hear from other women (or men) on this one. oh, and in response to one of the other posters, i would have reported this behavior had i realized that it was so inappropriate. not that anything would have been done about it.........after all, he is a doctor. thanks for your help.

if he's in private practice i'm not sure who you would report it to. also, things this "vague", though without a doubt inappropriate, are hard to quantify when you do report. i would "speak with my pocketbook" and find another pediatrician immediately. no more visits to this one. there are actually many good pediatricians out there, and with some asking around you can find another one. but i personally would not ever see this one again. if anyone at the practice asks why you are changing, you can either say nothing--you don't have to give a reason-- or just say i wasn't comfortable with dr. touch-my-hair. good luck. your instincts are good, by the way. you can trust them.