Is there/should there be a gay/lesbian nurses association?

allnurses Guide · Jul 19, 2004

JayneG - awesome and moving post. I just started reading this thread today so it was very interesting to read so many posts and then come upon yours.

Thank you so much for sharing your perspective.

steph

chattypattyCRNA2B · Jul 19, 2004

As I explained in my previous post...partner benefits, isolation, discrimination, support and friendship are all relevant issues that nurses face. What is so wrong about wanting support regarding these issues as a nurse? We are not robots or automatons...we're human, and until you know and understand what it's like to be a minority then you won't understand the importance of a group that can offer support and advice. Who will be the gay patients advocate? Who can guide heterosexual nurses when it comes to offering support to gay patients and their issues with loss, isolation, support, advice, legal issues etc? You can say that we should treat everyone equally, but sadly that doesn't always happen, and if a gay patient's mother is stopping their partner from visiting them or gaining information about their care, how will you understand the implications of that and how to deal with it if there is no representation of the gay community in the nursing community? Gay people have their own unique issues and they should have the right to form groups in order to discuss and deal with those issues. Would you object to a black nurses organisation?

I wasn't going to respond to this thread, but you just had to go there didn't you? WHY oh WHY must people always correlate the struggles that face African-Americans with the issues facing gays? It is true that NOONE should be discriminated against, regardless of ones sexual orientation, but to equate it to the history that African-Americans have had to undergo is very offensive. This has always touched a nerve with me and I find it very unnerving. :angryfire Thousands of people were legally enslaved and beaten, looked upon as inferior and ignorant, people were killed just because of their color......well, providing a history lesson is not necessary. I'm sure you know what I'm getting at. Mind you, I don't think it is important to have a black nurse organization either. There are organizations already in place for both African-Americans and gays that involve making sure civil liberties are being met. Why attempt to divide on every level imaginable? Next thing you know their will be a Gay and Lesbian PTA or an African-American PTA......give me a break! :rolleyes:

Dixiedi · Jul 19, 2004

It's a legitimate question, so i completely and strongly disagree with it being a "pot-stirrer" and the OP being called a "troll".
But no, i do not think there should be a gay/lesbian nurses association, it would only cause a bigger distance in the divide that already exists.
My namebadge doesn't say "Straight LPN" and a co-workers does not say "Gay RN". Personal lives (preferences) are just that, personal, and an association will only succeed in bringing profession and personal life together, when in fact, they should be separate.

Best response I have read here. There is no reason to bring your personal life into the job. That's one thing that hurts nurses, a lot. I understand, I'm not complaining that it happens, but just calling in because the kid is sick or babysitter didn't show up. I understand these things happen but it causes just one more problem. Add to that problem the G/L nurses standing out as if trying to make our personal lives even more noticable at work can only hurt more.

We can not change the fact that kids get sick and baby sitters don't show. We can change/stop many other personal aspects that sneak into the workplace and a G/L association would be one of the many we need to start with.

We must stand together as nurses before we can hold up individualized personal preverance groups.

MellowOne · Jul 19, 2004

No

The Mellow One

SugarMagnoliaMom · Jul 19, 2004

I have to say I was relieved to see JENNIFERHELENE's thoughts on this message, I was thinking the same.

I do believe this could have been a wonderful opportunity to discuss medical and nursing special needs of gay/lesbian or transgender/sexual patients. If that was the original intention. Also the legalalities of allowing partners to be involved in decision making when the legal family says no (this is a HUGE issue for me, as I have several very close gay friends, and I constantly advise them to get power of attorney in case of illness or accident so they can remain each others #1 in such a situation; where a family may try to interfere).

Nurse Ratched, RN · Jul 19, 2004

I wasn't going to respond to this thread, but you just had to go there didn't you? WHY oh WHY must people always correlate the struggles that face African-Americans with the issues facing gays? It is true that NOONE should be discriminated against, regardless of ones sexual orientation, but to equate it to the history that African-Americans have had to undergo is very offensive. Thousands of people were legally enslaved and beaten, looked upon as inferior and ignorant, people were killed just because of their color.

I don't want to hijack this thread, but I pulled the most relevant portions of your post and wanted to address your question. I presume the analogy is made because there are similarities. Homosexual people have been looked upon as inferior, pedophiles, and abominations. They have been legally discriminated against. And they have been killed for being homosexual - no other reason. Many have killed themselves rather than continue to endure the shame and abuse foisted upon them by society.

As far as whether any specific subset of the larger nursing group should make a new organization to address their specific concerns, I leave that to others to argue. I'm not sure nursing as a whole is well-served by further dividing us, but I'm not opposed to the notion.

SugarMagnoliaMom · Jul 19, 2004

Nurse Ratched,

I had to say your tagline from Adelle is awesome! What a wonderful philosophy to live by.

I may have to jot that down and embroider it on a pillow or something ~ LOL!

Fantastic! What a great philosophy for anyone trying to loose weight or take control of illness in their lives.

Thanks for sharing!

ParrotHeadRN · Jul 19, 2004

I was starting on a long post in response to things many people have said, but it raises up so many emotions that I don't think I can because you can't hear tones while reading online,and I really don't want anything I say to be misconstrued.

I am in a lesbian relationship. I am a nurse. I would LOVE it if there was a group of nurses I could belong to where I knew I was safe to talk about anything at all. I see lots of "personal life doesn't belong at work." That's nonsense. People that work together are going to talk about their home lives, it's natural when you work side by side in a stressful job. You can't talk about the job ALL the time. Where I work there are get togethers, a yearly picnic for families, etc. Only one person I work with knows for sure about my home life, although I think probably some have figured it out. I listen to people talk about their husbands/wives/girlfriends/boyfriends all the time. I live in a small town and in a conservative area. I sure don't pipe up frequently about my home life. Imagine not feeling free to talk about the person that means the most in your life, having to ALWAYS watch what you say and who you say it in front of. I work with many great people and they are wonderful to me, but they would be different w/ me if they knew I live w/ another woman. So yes, it affects my job and my comfort and safety level all the time. And, I frequently have to hear patients make homophobic remarks, listen to conversations between family members that I wish I hadn't. I just smile and try to finish what I am doing quickly so I can leave the room. Knowing that if they knew "THE TRUTH" about me they wouldn't be comfortable w/ me as their nurse. I guess they would be more comfortable w/ me knowing I had stayed in a marriage w/ an abusive alcoholic. At least then I would be "normal."

I know I sound angry, and I am sorry. There is such a negative climate in this country right now, that sometimes I can't help but feel a little hostile.

SO YES a GLBT nursing organization would be a wonderful thing. I don't think there will EVER be one in my area, and if there were, I don't know that I would join. That sounds really sad as I look back over what I have written, but unless things change a lot, at least in MY neck of the woods, that's how things are.

The last nursing magazine I read had an article about minority nursing organizations and what a good thing they were, giving voice to those of us with little say. I can't think how it would affect anyone else one way or the other. Except, of course, those who know about the "homosexual agenda" and that we are trying to take over the world and turn EVERYONE gay.

Jailhouse RN · Jul 19, 2004

No, there is no need to be seporate. Gays and Lesbians are welcome to any group I belong to. We are who we are; just nurses (people).

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Jul 19, 2004

No, there is no need to be seporate. Gays and Lesbians are welcome to any group I belong to. We are who we are; just nurses (people).

Simple, to the point, great post.

finness · Jul 19, 2004

and this association would be something like the heterosexual nurses association, right?
tell me, why do gay folk need to set themselves apart from the rest of us? are gay folk special?

when it comes to the right to marry, raise a family, and live without discrimination, yes, gay people are "special". or so says the supreme court. sexuality is much more then what goes on between the sheets. :wink2:

RN92 · Jul 19, 2004

being lesbian is such a small part of all that i am, and yet it's such a huge part of all that i am as well... i'm a woman, a nurse, a conservative republican catholic pro-life mom and grandmother, a partner and a sister and a daughter... i wear make up and i iron all my uniforms... i was president of my children's catholic school pta, i taught first communion and confirmation, and i attend mass as often as i can... i go to a gay & lesbian club to have a beer and dance and be in my comfort zone, i've been to pride in several cities all over the us, and i have rainbow decals on my little tracker and a red aids awareness ribbon on my work id badge... but i'm not so sure i need a separate nurse's association when i've worked so very hard at blending and helping people realize we're all the same... being lesbian isn't about my bedroom life... it's just what is...

now, that makes perfect sense. how can a group make themselves more accepted and respected - if they cut themselves off from every one else. we are nurses. there are many many different kinds - but the bottom line is that we all share one common goal. we have a need to help sick people. jayneg, i would work beside you any day.!!