Insensitive Husband

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I'm the insensitive husband. My wife is a nurse that works in the float pool. She spends a lot time working in behavioral health and the medical floors.

She has been working 3-4 16 hour shifts per 2 week pay period lately.

She feels that since she is working 16 hour shifts, and a nurse that I should be more appreciative.

I see things different than her. I wish I could 16 hour shifts and have more days off. I will 4 days off to her 8-9 days off per pay period. I work 80 hours per pay period and she works 60-70 hours. I wish I could do that.

She will also explain to me how hard nursing is. In my mind, that is what she enjoys and is good at. Most of her issues with being a nurse is dealing with other nurses. It has nothing to do with the work itself.

I basically came her to see if I could get a better understanding of how she feels. To hear from other nurses that have done the same thing and how their spouses were.

Please don't hold back. I want your real thoughts. If I mad you mad, then tell me.

It is hard to describe to somebody who has never done it, especially when you have been doing it for 18 years and are just accustomed to the stress!

You seem like a really nice individual, looking for some sincere advice from nurses. Unfortunately the truth is most nurses are very arrogant, self centered, individuals. As you have probably noted by their replies to your post. Now this does by no means say that they are all like this, but Its been my personal experience that the ones on this site are. Either way I hope that you can seek professional help else where but I wouldn't expect ANY miracles here.

Where do you work that nurses are arrogant? Nursing and self centered just do not seem to go together.

This guy came here looking for insight on how to make his marriage better and his wife happy and all you can do is gloat on your relationship. You could never take care of me with that insensitive attitude. Is that what nursing school has taught you? Honestly Im not sure why such cruel people want to have such important jobs that involve Helping not Tearing others down. I guess as long as your book smart any one can pass nursing school.

Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
Anyone else notice there are a lot of brand spanking new members on this thread? How does that happen?

Is this thread on Facebook?? :eek:

Yep. I have realized that too. It wouldn't surprise me if he did that. He seems like that immature person that would want people on his side because none of us are. Haha!

Specializes in ICU.

I also have a husband that just doesn't get it, thinks that because I work 13-14 hours 3 days a week that I shouldn't be so tired or that the house should be better cleaned. He doesn't understand what it's like to be emotionally drained day after day by patients and families. He doesn't understand that I am holding people's lives in my hands and that I better not screw up because then that opens up Lawsuits and license issues. Not to mention that Dr's are yelling at us and other nurses run and hide when you try and ask them to help you clean up your patient.

Psych is a tough environment, patients playing mind games, never knowing if your patient is going to go off the deep end.

Don't try and compare just be there for her. Listen when she needs to unload. Lotion her feet! She will think you have lost your mind but in a good way. Good Luck

Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
This guy came here looking for insight on how to make his marriage better and his wife happy and all you can do is gloat on your relationship. You could never take care of me with that insensitive attitude. Is that what nursing school has taught you? Honestly Im not sure why such cruel people want to have such important jobs that involve Helping not Tearing others down. I guess as long as your book smart any one can pass nursing school.

No. He specially said he did NOT want advice on his relationship, actually. Go back & read it. I can direct you to it if you can't find it.

My husband does not always understand what I do at work and what all is involved. However, he also does not try to compete with me as to who works harder, who makes more money, who has a tougher job or whatever.

He supports me regardless, as well as I support him regardless.

That is just the basic's of marriage -

I hope that you never have to be hospitalized and have to see first hand how difficult the job is. And if you do, certainly don't share the same thoughts you posted here with the nurse who is taking care of you !!

This guy came here looking for insight on how to make his marriage better and his wife happy and all you can do is gloat on your relationship. You could never take care of me with that insensitive attitude. Is that what nursing school has taught you? Honestly Im not sure why such cruel people want to have such important jobs that involve Helping not Tearing others down. I guess as long as your book smart any one can pass nursing school.

Specializes in kids.
My opinion is already verified by you in your post title.

Tell your wife I said to call you a Waaaaambulance.

One RN opinion down, 100,000 to go.

Best of luck. To her.

Once again...

Far for the win!!!!!!!!!!!

Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
This guy came here looking for insight on how to make his marriage better and his wife happy and all you can do is gloat on your relationship. You could never take care of me with that insensitive attitude. Is that what nursing school has taught you? Honestly Im not sure why such cruel people want to have such important jobs that involve Helping not Tearing others down. I guess as long as your book smart any one can pass nursing school.

Are you from Facebook Mr. Troll?

Are you even a nurse? Because it is illegal to call yourself one if you are not, by the way.

Specializes in Psychiatric, Aesthetics.
This guy came here looking for insight on how to make his marriage better and his wife happy and all you can do is gloat on your relationship. You could never take care of me with that insensitive attitude. Is that what nursing school has taught you? Honestly Im not sure why such cruel people want to have such important jobs that involve Helping not Tearing others down. I guess as long as your book smart any one can pass nursing school.

That's great to be supportive of the OP and you sound very caring! Some nurses are crusty- I think it's more of emotional armor that brings them to that point. The OP tho doesn't sound like he wants to make his wife happy to me. It sounds like he wants to make himself happy!

Are you from Facebook Mr. Troll?

Are you even a nurse? Because it is illegal to call yourself one if you are not, by the way.

I am a nurse and the title means nothing but the fact that I have the privilege of serving MY community. I assume that most on this site are nurses and it just irritates me on how insensitive they are being to a guy who just wanted answers. We have all delt with family members and are trained on THERAPEUTIC COMMUNICATION. LETS ACT LIKE IT.

Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
I am a nurse and the title means nothing but the fact that I have the privilege of serving MY community. I assume that most on this site are nurses and it just irritates me on how insensitive they are being to a guy who just wanted answers. We have all delt with family members and are trained on THERAPEUTIC COMMUNICATION. LETS ACT LIKE IT.

Considering all the new nurses who have just joined the conversation & you repeating yourself twice! Didn't come here for answers regarding his relationship. I told you that.

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