I'm Too Tired to Cry | Life of a Nurse

Are you tired? Do you let the tears flow?

I have shed a lot of tears in the last 15 years working as a bedside nurse. Tears of joy, frustration, fear, devastation, sadness, happiness, heartache, love. Years of seeing people at their worst and best. Being there with patients and families on their most joyous and most devastating days. We can all relate to all these tears and how they’ve made us feel. I reflect on all the tears shed.

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kbrn2002, ADN, RN

3,729 Posts

Specializes in Geriatrics, Dialysis. Has 21 years experience.
15 hours ago, Nurse Writing Nook said:

All of this. Everything you wrote is what I've noticed lately. I used to cry and now I don't.

This is so profound. How do we heal from this? Do we?

Honestly I don't know that we do heal from this. I don't really know that we even should. 

The emotional blunting is how we survive the day to day grind while providing the best care we can to people we know are not likely to survive despite our best efforts.  If we give in to the emotions, how do we function in our jobs? How do we function at home with the weight of it all? 

I am coming to the belief that it's the nurses that are able to turn off or at least blunt their emotional response to the insanity in the workplace are the nurses that can continue to survive and even thrive in modern healthcare. 

Nurse Writing Nook, BSN, RN

5 Articles; 34 Posts

Specializes in NICU (neonatal). Has 18 years experience.
18 hours ago, toomuchbaloney said:

It's difficult to heal from a gut punch while you are getting slapped and kicked...you survive now and heal your wounds in the calm. 

I don't mean to be glib, but people will need to find group support where they can find it.  Sometimes employer based interactions don't feel safe but sometimes they are great. Employers aren't often as committed to the support as is needed for the health of the victims.  Our entire health system has sort of diminished and under stressed the importance of good mental health hygiene. 

That's a great way of putting it. I agree about the group support. Even though I've never been a fan of the debriefs or generic "we care about your mental health" crap that the hospital puts out there. I've been finding writing to be an outlet and just reading people's posts here in allnurses. You're right, find group support where we can find it.

4 hours ago, kbrn2002 said:

The emotional blunting is how we survive the day to day grind while providing the best care we can to people we know are not likely to survive despite our best efforts.  If we give in to the emotions, how do we function in our jobs? How do we function at home with the weight of it all? 

So true. It's our defense mechanism. We need to have that barrier, or otherwise we'd never survive.

toomuchbaloney

9,748 Posts

Specializes in NICU, PICU, Transport, L&D, Hospice. Has 44 years experience.

We will need to address the PTSD that will follow this pandemic among the hardest hit communities.  First we have to achieve a measure of herd immunity and slow the number of healthcare encounters caused by covid. 

Kaptain57

17 Posts

Specializes in Dr of vet med, ER/ICU/Vet Anesthesia/Practice.

With profoundest of respects.....this is not meant disrespectfully AT ALL

 

u cry because u care   

 

your holding neonates and u and your fellow nurses don't go to a job full of hope and song and fun...........your a tea bag dipped in crushing caseloads of suffering, pain, slow healing, endless complications and oppressive responsibitilties (one of thousands of variables) ...........stress and holdind people togeher and caught between conflcting doctors and politicies...

 

who in gods name could stand this let alone endure and endure

 

 

why in gods name wouldnt u cry ...(its because u care)

 

 

stone...........my mother my family.................never cries....

 

 

 

only nurses....................can do and endure the inhuman job called nursing

 

WE need to start taking care of the nurses who save us and save our loved ones......................................they need reasonable conditions, reasonable hours caseloads, its needs to be recognized the severe emotional side of this job even if nurses or anyone doesnt show it...........this environment has a delayed effect and nurses cant turn off their cases thats what makes them nurses and dedicated...........unless we want to turn them into robots like many doctors we all loathe. 

 

 

Out of respect.............WE 

 

MUST

 

start to take care 

 

of Our heroic (know u hate this word) nurses......

 

get mad at me all u want...........that our view.....nurses work incredibly too hard to be misunderstood and used and thrown away..........its WRONG

Nurse Writing Nook, BSN, RN

5 Articles; 34 Posts

Specializes in NICU (neonatal). Has 18 years experience.
On 9/22/2021 at 10:33 AM, Kaptain57 said:

WE need to start taking care of the nurses who save us and save our loved ones

Yes, we absolutely do!