I'm thinking about trying to get pregnant and start nursing school? Yes or No?

LydiaNN · Jan 17, 2005

Thank you so much for all of your advice! I definatley will not attempt to do both. My good sense told me it wouldn't be a good idea but I'm getting a lot of pressure from family and friends. I'm 25 and everyone is telling me I'm getting close to the age of being too old to have babies!!! I really appreciate all of the replys!

Heavens to Betsy! I have friends in their early 40s who are just having their FIRST baby. I wouldn't recommend waiting quite that long, but at age 25, you have plenty of time to pursue educational opportunities before parenthood. I had my son in my late 20s, and I felt it was perfect timing- I was out of school and had been working for a while, but I still had enough energy to keep up with the demanding toddler that my spectacularly angelic baby turned into!

SmilingBluEyes · Jan 17, 2005

25 approaching old age? Omg these people need to get their noses OUT of your personal business. Why people think they have any right to speak up on something so personal, is beyond me; it's so rude. Do NOT let ANYone pressure you----when the time is right for you and your husband, THEN and ONLY then, start your family. As you can imagine, having kids is no less than life-altering. So is becoming a nurse. NEVER would I recommend doing them concurrently. Wait with one.....

And understand, many people successfully become pregnant after 25, for heaven's sake. UNLESS you have fertility issues in the family, try not to worry about that! Best of luck.

allnurses Guide · Jan 17, 2005

25 approaching old age? Omg these people need to get their noses OUT of your personal business. Why people think they have any right to speak up on something so personal, is beyond me; it's so rude. Do NOT let ANYone pressure you----when the time is right for you and your husband, THEN and ONLY then, start your family. As you can imagine, having kids is no less than life-altering. So is becoming a nurse. NEVER would I recommend doing them concurrently. Wait with one.....
And understand, many people successfully become pregnant after 25, for heaven's sake. UNLESS you have fertility issues in the family, try not to worry about that! Best of luck.

Wow, 25? Most people are barely finished with college then.

And I had my last baby at 43.

Do not get pregnant AND go to nursing school.

Lots of great advice here . . go to school first. It is only a few years.

steph

jeepgirl, LPN, NP · Jan 17, 2005

Now, I have heard that fertility takes a punge after age 29-30... but that does not mean that you are infertile afterwards! A LOT of women are not having babies until after age 35. and I have never heard of 25 being too old to have a baby!

my husband and i have been married a little over a year now also.... and we're getting baby fever as well. but get this... since I am out of school... we have a little extra money... so we're planning to make a baby starting sometime around august. since we have more money than we used to and i'm out of school... we're going to take a late honeymoon and go to JAMAICA to hopefully make baby! Then, when I have said baby, I should have a full 12 weeks PTO.

things will be wonderful if you wait until you are out of school and working. the paid time off thing is very good... its a piece of mind!

annefan · Jan 17, 2005

I've been married for almost two years now and am starting to get the baby fever! I just appiled to the nursing program for the fall of 2005. For all the mother's out there, how hard is it to get through nursing school and have a child? My husband really wants to start trying now but I'm really nervous about how I'll be able to manage a newborn and nursing. Please let me know your stories and experiences!

Dear ROS,

Take it from me, DON'T DO IT!!! I am a junior in nursing school & I have a 6 month old son. Yes, that's right, the stork decided to pay me a visit during my first semester of nursing school! I've been married several years & we were planning to wait until I finished the program, but I guess mother nature had other things in mind. After finishing the 1st semester with lots of morning sickness & fatigue, I decided to take a leave of absence. Turns out it was a smart thing to do, because I ended up a high risk pregnancy, etc. Also, at my school, they don't let you take courses out of sequence, so I had to take the entire year off & pick up this January. I'm glad I had the year off, because I was soooooo tired for the first 4 months after he was born. I felt like a walking zombie, even though I had the help of my very wonderful husband, his parents, & my mom. Also, believe what the others are saying here about nursing school being hard. It is. The nursing program is much more intense than classes you would take at another college or university. I already have a bachelor's degree & let me tell you I can feel the difference. For example, never, ever while working on my bachelor's did I have to use a calendar or do time management tables to get my work & reading done, but in nursing school I do. The pace is very fast & there are lots of "extra" assignements, like projects, papers, skills labs write-ups, care plans, etc. I'm not trying to say it can't be done, but you would have to be willing to give up almost all of your recreational time, because between school & the baby I don't really have any. I am constantly doing something & I can't remember the last time I went to the movies or anything! My advice to you is do one at a time, so you can reap the full enjoyment of each, especially giving birth, because it's such a wonderful experience you don't want to miss out on anything. Not to sound cliche' but it's true that "having a baby changes everything". I'm sorry this post is so long, but I really wanted to convey to you what it's like. And on a final note....there was another girl in my class who was also pregnant, who continued going to school & she's graduating this semester; she told me "I'm staying in school, because I believe where there's a will, there's a way", & my reply to her was "just because you can do something, doesn't mean it's a good idea". Good luck in whatever you decide!

Antikigirl, ASN, RN · Jan 17, 2005

NO! I would seriously advise against that!!!!!!! You are choosing a career that dedicates your life to help others...not your own..others, strangers! It is demanding, it is hard, it is grueling, it can be satisfying...but all and all it is more tug on the emotions, the heart, the soal to try to do this..and still find strength to come home and be the mother you want to be!

I went into nursing school when my son was 2. He has forever known a life of mommy never being home, or having to study, or having to sleep, or being testy, or having to actually plan times for him on a calander in PENCIL weeks in advanced! He is now 10 and he can't even stay in cub scouts, take on extra school functions like he wants to because mommy works during that time, or daddy does (daddy is a paramedic). He has to beg me to drink coffee at nights so I can play with him, he is without many children his age to play with because I am not available to drive him to friends homes.

Converstations turn medical no matter what you try to do..even if it is in your mind! I look at my son, and when he tells me a probelm at school, or does something risky...I tell him the medical consequences of that...I look at him and notice if his eyes are dark, skin looks dehydrated, ask about his bowel habits if he is sick. It has gotten to a point that he will hurt himself to even get my attention because he knows..if I am not a nurse...I am too tired to be anything else!

NO, I would suggest not! Nursing school and nursing isn't good for the body at this time, or the bonding and love you will need time for after birth. It will demand more from you than you can give when your heart says 'be a mother'...it isn't a good choice!

Be there for your baby, don't pick a career that will take you from being a mother. If you feel that you need a career more...don't have a child!!!!!!! Isn't fair for the child who will want and NEED a mother to nurture them, love them, mend a boo boo without going "oh GOD I do this all day...okay fine where does it hurt". No, they need a mommy...and nurse and mommy are too close to distinguish and separate..trust me!

If you want to have a child and be a nurse...wait till the child is in school first...that is my best advice..this comming from a woman that miscarried 2 babies in nursing school... and missed out on much of my own childs development because of work...it wasn't worth that...that was time I will NEVER get back!!!!!!!!

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Jan 17, 2005

Thank you so much for all of your advice! I definatley will not attempt to do both. My good sense told me it wouldn't be a good idea but I'm getting a lot of pressure from family and friends. I'm 25 and everyone is telling me I'm getting close to the age of being too old to have babies!!! I really appreciate all of the replys!

Tell them to back off. It's your body, you life, and this may sound harsh, but for them to pressure you about the choices in your life is pretty selfish of them.

rach_nc_03 · Jan 17, 2005

I have severe endometriosis, and had one surgery for it last june, and another coming up in march (during spring break)...this is my last semester of an ADN program. I'm on multiple meds (methadone for severe pain, lamictal for hormone-related migraines, wellbutrin because of anxiety- duh!), and I'm constantly tired and in pain. I want to have a baby pretty desparately- about to turn 33, and the docs think I only get one shot at this, because of the endo- but I couldn't risk the potential complications, combined with the stresses of school. And the stresses of school could certainly exacerbate any complications you encounter. If you have the ability to delay one or the other, I'd say you should.

All that being said, my boyfriend is in the military, stationed in japan....when he's here on leave, we'll be giving it an enthusiastic try, anyway!

mideb · Jan 17, 2005

I've been married for almost two years now and am starting to get the baby fever! I just appiled to the nursing program for the fall of 2005. For all the mother's out there, how hard is it to get through nursing school and have a child? My husband really wants to start trying now but I'm really nervous about how I'll be able to manage a newborn and nursing. Please let me know your stories and experiences!

I was pregnant my 2nd yr., & even tho everything turned out OK, I wouldn't do it again. Too much stress unless your husband is willing to take over much of household duties & being up with baby at night. Some of the homework keeps you up at night & exhaustion easily sets in which isn't good for baby or school.

Q. · Jan 17, 2005

25 approaching old age?

:chuckle

Exactly.

Your fertility decreases 10-15% after age 30, but that doesn't mean you won't conceive at all.

I'm 32 and pregnant with twins - and this is my first pregnancy. I work full time and am a full time grad student; the exhaustion and nausea/vomiting nearly got myself flunked right out of school this past semester. Thank god my prof was really understanding and allowed me to revamp a major paper in 24 hours before final grades were due. I passed.

By time I get home from work and do minor household chores that my hubby even helps with, I'm exhausted. I'm in bed by 9. I start school again this week and I'm already dreading it, but it's my last semester.

I spend 50% of my time standing and teaching, the other 50% of my time at a desk. Standing just about kills me and I'm only 18 weeks.

I wouldn't recommend becoming pregnant and enrolling in school intentionally. Both are demanding and as SmilingBluEyes pointed out, your pregnancy may not be a walk in the park. You may end up on bedrest which then would require you to withdraw from school anyway, most likely.

I'm already fearing that having a multiple gestation and all, but hoping for the best.

Take one at a time.

hock1 · Jan 17, 2005

There are a lot of good posts on this subject. I recommend a search. My advice, for what it's worth, if you are young why rush it. If not, then it might be something to think about more urgently. My friends and I did nursing school with small children. One of us was pg, delivered, came right back and finished successfully. The key to our success was awesome family and friend support. Our husbands were there for us too. Just a note...currently on my floor, there are two nurses and one doctor who are expecting their first child! The facility is understanding and working with them. Best wishes with your decision.

rayofsunshine · Jan 18, 2005

Thank you guys for all the good advice. I'm glad I have this website to come to to get advice from those who have already experienced what I'm about to.