I Need Major Guidance!!!

blue heron · Apr 2, 2005

Are not people who are infected with deadly diseases such as HIV liable and prosecutable for having unprotected sex and not informing their partner? I would contact your local police or health department or an attorney to find out about possible law violations.

There's a guy here in Canada (I forget which province) that is facing several murder charges for having unprotected sex with women and not informing them of his HIV. Not much comfort for you and your brother, but it might stop her from repeating this behaviour.

Amethyst Veralyn · Apr 2, 2005

I have another question to ask that's different from the above topic.

I also need guidance. Lately I've been assigned to several patients who

like to ask me personal questions and are intrusive into my private life.

I know this is part of their dementia and yet it still infuriates me. I'm wondering how

other people handle intrusive questions. Even telling them that my private life

is private is still my own business. I have asked not to be assigned to them and

they have tried to take me off and yet still need me there sometimes when they

can't find anyone.

ShawnetteRN05 · Apr 2, 2005

TELL YOUR BROTHER! :redlight:

Audreyfay · Apr 3, 2005

I have another question to ask that's different from the above topic.
I also need guidance. Lately I've been assigned to several patients who
like to ask me personal questions and are intrusive into my private life.
I know this is part of their dementia and yet it still infuriates me. I'm wondering how
other people handle intrusive questions. Even telling them that my private life
is private is still my own business. I have asked not to be assigned to them and
they have tried to take me off and yet still need me there sometimes when they
can't find anyone.

This is what I learned from a psych social worker: "Why do you want to know?" Then they go into a long detailed explanation. "What would it mean to you if I did . . . whatever they told you." Then, "What would it mean to you if I didn't . . whatever they told you."

Another method is to say that I am here to help you and we need to focus on you now.

The other day I was teaching a patient about his diabetes. He was quite a joker. Sometimes people ask me very personal questions that I choose not to answer. This guy asked me, "have you had a total hip replacement?" I asked him, "why do you ask?" And he said that I "moved my butt from side to side when I walked." I exclaimed to him, "What are you looking at my butt for?!" :rotfl: I was, of course, just teasing him. He never got his question answered.

Another patient when working with him asked me, "Do you have some kind of a hormone problem, or do you just like to eat?" I am a bigger person. I asked him why he wanted to know. He got kind of flabbergasted and blubbered something. :uhoh3: That ended that one. Play the game and use the words. They really work! Good luck! My advice is don't disclose ANYTHING about yourself that isn't beneficial to the situation in which you are in with the patient.

Audreyfay · Apr 3, 2005

BTW Cyndi, GOOD JOB! Your brother saved his pride by getting angry, but he told you what he really needed, by taking the information you offered.

live4today, RN · Apr 3, 2005

i have a very touchy subject that i really need some help in dealing with. so, your advice is greatly appreciated. my brother is living with and having sexual relations with a woman he met and moved in with about three months ago. the problem is that this woman made a comment to me today that she doesn't care for blood donor centers. after much persuasion, she explained that she had received positive hiv results approximately 5 years ago. i asked if she had further tests and she stated, "no, they are full of it and just trying to get my money". i don't know if she has ever discussed this with my brother and i know that it is not going to go over really well if this comes from me. worst part of all this, the sexual relations are unprotected and anal sex is a major part of their relations. any suggestions? this has been going on for three months. help!!!!

if it were my sibling sleeping with someone who just confessed she/he tested positive for hiv or any other std, i would have told that person to come straight with the information to my sibling right then and there, and i would go with them to make sure she/he told my sibling. if that person refused to tell my sibling, i wouldn't waste anytime telling him/her. it would no longer be up for discussion. :stone