I made her cry

susanmary · Nov 6, 2002

Work related? Hmmmm. She needed to negotiate with you, up front, for any additional time she needed to spend off the floor in addition to her lunch break. You were not wrong. You are depending on your coworker to be a team player -- you were/she wasn't. Can't imagine being responsible for 50 alzheimer's patients.

robinrdrn · Nov 6, 2002

Probably, she had a responsibility to tell you she was off the floor for something "work related." I suspect she spent 30 min with human resourses about her work performance!

Dr. Kate, BSN, RN · Nov 6, 2002

Call me hard hearted but. . . tears are often used as a means of manipulation. It's easy to get caught up in the "I hurt her feelings" thing and forget that you have a legitimate issue with someone's behavior.

Tears are the responsibility of the person crying. You did the right thing confronting her about where she was for an hour.

Rustyhammer · Nov 6, 2002

I hate it when the waterworks come on whenever there is some type of disagreement of confrontation.

It gives the appearence of unprofessionalism and forgive me, but weakness.

Now I'm not talking about when somone is berated into tears for bullying is an even worse thing. (different thread).

But we all know that nurse who is late everyday and when you ask her about it or let her know that you have a life too, she breaks down in tears and the talk is over.

-Russell

whipping girl in 07, RN · Nov 6, 2002

You didn't make her cry; she chose to cry. It doesn't sound to me like you did anything that would make a sane, mature adult cry. So she could be insane, immature, or five years old, and those would be the only excuses for crying when you asked why she was gone an hour for lunch instead of thirty minutes.

Wow, y'all actually get to leave the floor to eat???

BadBird, BSN, RN · Nov 6, 2002

Tears of guilt was my first thought, no I don't think you were wrong. I would be very upfront, if your policy is 30 min. for lunch then that is what you take, any additional time should be discussed before it is taken and planned when it is beneficial for both of you.

Trauma Columnist · Nov 6, 2002

Oh well. Just my opinion but people that take more than the allotted time for lunch are inconsiderate. If they choose to cry - oh well. Also, while I'm on my high horse - why do smokers get so many breaks????

I'm a nonsmoker who is lucky to get lunch.

NicuGal, MSN, RN · Nov 6, 2002

I would have done the same thing...you have to accountable for any time over your lunch, right?

nursedawn67, LPN · Nov 6, 2002

she should have told you "I'm going to be off the floor do such and such and then I will be going to lunch."

You did nothing wrong. She needed to be reminded of the times for lunch break.

nursedawn67, LPN · Nov 6, 2002

Originally posted by traumaRUs
Oh well. Just my opinion but people that take more than the allotted time for lunch are inconsiderate. If they choose to cry - oh well. Also, while I'm on my high horse - why do smokers get so many breaks????

I'm a nonsmoker who is lucky to get lunch.

I understand that. My one friend/coworker smokes and goes out several times at night to do so (only if she isn't busy at that moment). But she does NOT take a lunch break, she figures with her going outside several times adds up to her lunch break time. Many times she misses her "smoking breaks" for patient needs and care. Others in our facility take way advantage of this and are out smoking way more then are in the building.

sjoe · Nov 6, 2002

"Do you think I was being manipulated by the tears?"

Do you even have to ask? Why fall for this tired kind of stuff? Even if the tears were genuine (which is doubtful), and her "feelings were hurt" so what? That doesn't mean she doesn't have responsibilities, nor that you should be doing her work.