Husband Trying to Discourage Me from Nursing

Published

Hi all! I'm pre-nursing and have completed all my pre-reqs for NS, and right now patiently waiting for my husband to graduate in Dec. so I can hopefully start NS soon after. Anyway, my hubby and I got into a disagreement last night over me wanting to become a nurse. He has a poor attitude towards nurses and said a lot of negative things that upset me. I don't know if he's just saying these things to get me to change my mind, or what. He's been spending a lot of time at the hospital since his mother had her liver transplant last month and had complications after the surgery. He basically told me that nurses are dumb and don't know s**t, and the reason why they get paid so much is because of the shortage. He also said he can't believe that my dream is to clean poop, because "that's all they do". :no: I argued with him about this, and he said he feels like this because whenever he asks the nurses taking care of his mother "hows she is doing" they always give him an "I don't know" answer, or they tell him he would have to speak with the dr. So now he has this vision of nurses being dumb and don't do anything except clean poop all day long. It really made me mad!!

Not only that, be he also said that nurses are always getting ******* at by the family members of patients, and asks me why would I want to quit my "nice" job for that. UGH!! He gives me the impression that he wants me to stay at my boring cubicle job for the rest of my life, sitting on my a** all day, making peanuts (compared to what nurses...including LVNs make), which of course he denies. I don't know what else to do and I'm very depressed. But I still want to become a nurse, and I'm not going to let his negative comments discourage me. I just needed to vent, and also get other opinons about his attitude, and maybe some advice about what to tell him, because he's not being supportive. I'm really upset!!:(

Specializes in ICU/Critical Care.

I don't discuss CT/Xray results with families unless the results are normal. I usually just tell the family that the doctor will explain all radiology results to them. I'm sorry but I'm not risking losing my job or my license by discussing radiology reports that show abnormalities. For me, it's not about HIPAA, it's about not disclosing information that the doctor should ultimately be discussing with families/patients.

Re: not being able to discuss diagnosis until after the doctor has:

often i'll have patients in for chest pain or syncope or something, and i'll give them antibiotics that the doctor's prescribed for pneumonia. so of course the patient wants to know why they're taking antibiotics. when i tell them the reason, they're like, "what? pneumonia, they never told me that! they dont tell me anything." if you cant tell them until after the dr. has, but the dr. hasnt told them and you need to explain the reason for a med, what do you do?

Could it be possible that there are other things going on with him and he is using nursing as an excuse?? I mean, haven't you been taking your pre-reqs for a while now?? How come he never brought this up before??

I guess I'd sit down with him and see what's going on in his head. Maybe he's just really struggling with his mom or something else, and he doesn't know what to do other than make you upset??

Good luck with it. Hopefully he'll see the light.

Take care, and don't let it get to you!!

Specializes in Cardiac Telemetry, ED.

I never said anything about HIPAA in my post.

Specializes in Cardiac Telemetry, ED.
Re: not being able to discuss diagnosis until after the doctor has:

often i'll have patients in for chest pain or syncope or something, and i'll give them antibiotics that the doctor's prescribed for pneumonia. so of course the patient wants to know why they're taking antibiotics. when i tell them the reason, they're like, "what? pneumonia, they never told me that! they dont tell me anything." if you cant tell them until after the dr. has, but the dr. hasnt told them and you need to explain the reason for a med, what do you do?

I've found myself in that situation before as well. I will not say "You have pneumonia.". What I will say is something like "It looks like the doc is thinking that you may have an infection, possibly pneumonia. That would be a great question to ask when the doctor rounds on you in the morning.".

Specializes in Ortho, Case Management, blabla.
I don't discuss CT/Xray results with families unless the results are normal.

That's my attitude as well. I know there are some RNs on this board that would disagree with how I do it, but I tell pts, "The doctor needs to discuss this with you. Also, I'm no doctor, but if those were MY x-ray results I wouldn't really be worried about the results, you're gonna live *wink'

then again, I try to have a sense of humor with all my patients (writing words on the internet doesn't really convey this at all)

Specializes in DOU.
Could it be possible that there are other things going on with him and he is using nursing as an excuse?? I mean, haven't you been taking your pre-reqs for a while now?? How come he never brought this up before??

Maybe he's only just recently found out about the handsome male nurses. :loveya:

Specializes in Case Management.

Here's what you do.

Tell your husband that he is right, you don't think you want to be a nurse anymore.

Tell him you can make just as much if not more money stripping!!

Specializes in med-surg 5 years geriatrics 12 years.

Your post just reinforced [ again ] how lucky I am. When I started nursing school my husband told me if that was what I really wanted I couldn't let him, the kids, or anyone stop me. So I would give it time and quietly continue with school. maybe it is just the stress of his mom's health. If not you just need to look inward and decide what's best for YOU.

+ Join the Discussion