How Your Life Can Change in the Blink of an Eye!

[chase4myheart]

Since 1998, my mother has been plagued with numerous health problems, but we had been able to manage. My father has been partially paralayzed from a CVA since 1990. Last Thursday night, I got in from clinicals and talked to my mother and everything was fine. On Friday afternoon, I get a call that she has fell and is sick and needs to go to the ER. When I got there, she wasn't even able to walk through the house with my help, so I called an ambulance. She was diagnosed with pneumonia, and I was told that she would probably have to stay for about 5 days. I spent the night with her on Friday and she was very coherent. On Saturday, at midnight, the nurses call me and tell me that she is very disoriented and trying to crawl over the rails of her bed. They had to place her in restraints. Well, fast forward and in 1 weeks time, my mother is unable to stand on her own, and doesn't know who I am at times. I have no brothers and sisters to help out. I remember my mother making me promise that I would never put her in a nursing home when I was a little girl. If there were any way in the world that I could keep her home with me then I would, but I have to work to pay my bills, and neither my father or I can afford to have 24 hr. care. My husband works, but we have loans from where I'm in nursing school, and I have to get a job as soon as I graduate in May. My heart is just breaking at the thought of all of this. It just goes to show how one's life can change in the blink of an eye. Last week, anytime that I wanted to pick up the phone to talk to my mother and tell her what was going on in my life, I was able to. Now, she doesn't understand much of anything that I say. I have always heard people say that you don't realize what you've lost until you lose your mother. Now, I really understand what they meant. My mother's body is still here, but she's some place that I just can't reach her. It doesn't make it any easier that my parents live in another state. I keep hoping that the physicians are going to discover the reason for her mental state, but so far, they have just decided that it's dementia. I could really use some support from others that are going through or have been through problems like this with their parents. Thanks for listening to a very long post.

[gitterbug]

Dear Chase,

I am very, very sorry for your mother, your father, and you. I am sure this situation has been and continues to seem overpowering and unanswerable. First, have the physicians made any determination as to what is the nature of your mothers confusion? Ct scan? MRI? What results do they show? Secondly, have you talked the situation over with your father? Do you understand that there are professionals at the hospitals to steer you in the direction for help? Many facilities have "swing beds", LTAC, and other options if your mother needs it. I know what it is like to lose your mother, I miss mine everyday, but I cannot change the fact that death comes to our loved ones. One thing that is becoming very popular here, in nursing homes, it acute care with an emphasis on mental and physical therapy. I really do hope there is an improvement in her condition soon. I will pray for you and your family. He will be a source of comfort to you too if you allow Him into your life. Have a blessed day and please let us know how things resolve.

[AnnieOaklyRN, BSN, RN, EMT-P]

Dimentia does not happen over night, delerium does. Delerium is reversible so tell those doctors to figure out what is causing it!!!!! (meds, fever, environment.. could be a number of things)

Swtooth

[wildmountainchild]

Swtooth is right. Demientia does NOT occur overnight. However, delirium does. Your mother's PNA is a likely cause but so is fecal impaction, medications, dehydration, sleep deprivation, and a whole long list of other possibilities.

DEMAND that your mother's doctors take her off any unnecessary medications, work aggressively to control her infection, and ensure adequate hydration. This should resolve unless she has had some kind of CVA. People do not go into dementia overnight. This is delirium and delirium is reversible.

[MT RN]

I agree with swtooth, I would suspect medications. I've seen this happen numerous times to older folks. They come in to the hospital and are put on a bunch of new meds and before you know it, they are showing signs of delirium. If she has gone downhill that quickly, that would be the first place I would look.

[SmilingBluEyes]

Also concur with Swtooth. I wish you and your family the best. I hope you find some answers to help resolve things. I wish your mom improved health, too.

[TPfan24]

Hello, I have also had a similiar experience with a parent. My mother went from being fully ambulatory to falling and being unable to stand/ walk. this was due to a weaning off a medication. She ended up in the hospital and then rehab. Meds were changed and today I picked her up- alert and ambulatory. She will have follow up therapies. In your case any new meds, taking them incorrectly, UTI, sepsis? Has blood work been done such as B12 levels. I agree as above dementia is a slow process, there has to be a cause for the changes you have seen. Be assertive, you derserve to have your mother back and she surely needs her daughter. Get all the services recommended for your parents. Keep us posted.

[lsyorke, RN]

. I spent the night with her on Friday and she was very coherent. On Saturday, at midnight, the nurses call me and tell me that she is very disoriented and trying to crawl over the rails of her bed. They had to place her in restraints. Well, fast forward and in 1 weeks time, my mother is unable to stand on her own, and doesn't know who I am at times.

I agree with everyone else. FIND out what drugs were given to "deal" with her disorientation.

[mrscurtwkids4]

First, I just want to say how sorry I am that you are having to deal with this. My mother had multiple health issues also. And a number of years ago, she ended up with a sever stroke that paralyzed her left side. Then she ended up with a blood clot in the paralyzed leg and they ended up having to amputate the leg due to necrosis of her foot. The stroke impair her short term memory mostly, but a good bit of her long term memory is still intact. But I can still tell a huge difference in her...like she's no longer the mother I knew. And my poor father, fortunately in good health, has been her main caregiver. But I can tell over the last few years that it has been severely taking a toll on him as well. I live over 300 miles away so can not manage to be of help to them, however, my brother and sister do live locally to them. I know that my dad is earing himself down to the last nerve in dealing with her himself because he doesn't want her to end up in a nursing home. Granted, he does a wonderful job taking care of her, but I know that it's costing him emotionally and physically to do it. It breaks my heart because when I talk with her on the phone, she manages to remember that I'm in nursing school and graduating in May and always asks me if I'm going to come down there and take care of her. Boy, how I wish I could, but it just isn't a possibility.

I hope that some of the folks at the hospital might be able to help point you in the right direction to figure out what is best for your family's situation and also figures out better as to what the cause is behind your mother's condition.

[chase4myheart]

Thanks for all of your replies. I have gone over her meds with her physicians, and they have discontinued anything that they think could possibly be causing it. The strongest anxiety med she is taking is Ativan. They had her on the steroid Decadron (hope I spelled that correctly) in high doses for her pneumonia, and that was discontinued. The strongest pain med she is taking is Tramadol. She has had NPH (Normal Pressure Hydracelaphulus) for the past 2 years and her CT scan showed that her ventricles were enlarged, so they did a lumbar today. I just got off the phone with her nurses and they said that she was less agitated, but that she was still disoriented to what was going on around her. Her physician has assured me that they will try to rehabilitate her with physical therapy in the nursing home. I'm just afraid that she will give up and not even want to get better. I'm just trying to take one day at a time. Again, thanks for all of your replies. It makes me feel not so alone at a time like this.

[Jolie, BSN]

Wow, I could have written your post. My father has experienced similar changes in a relatively short period of time, and an extensive medical work-up has revealed nothing new. We now believe that he was showing signs of dementia that we overlooked, given that he was able to compensate (convincingly) for his deficits.

My very best to you and your family. I hope we all see a brighter future.

[kukukajoo, LPN]

I went through something VERY similar with my grandmother and was wrecked completely seeing her like that! My mother has passed and was an only child and grampa is dead as well. Responsibility fell on me.

She had surgery then pneumonia and a clot in her leg. The dememntial like symptoms which were horrible turned out to be the antibiotics and it is a rare reaction that can happen in the elderly from what I understand. With all these stronger meds out there, it affects the elderly so differently than someone who's body is functioning at a normal rate. I think they should do med test and studies on the elderly more.

When she was placed on Zpack a year later, the same thing happened, and this is how we knew that it was the meds. She drove to the police station to turn herself in for beating up my daughter at 3 in the morning! Mind you my daughter was home with me sleeping soundly! When we got her home and settled, she really thought she had done that and accused us of lying and trying to protect her- she swore Britt was dead in her apt! Then did not recognize me at all for some time.

Then next day she was calling me saying my other daughter was asleep on her couch and would not wake up- even put the phone to her "ear" which was only a pillow on the couch! She would not listen to family telling her all was okay.

Good news is, she is still living independently four years after the first incident, although recently had a foot fx that has limited her mobility. She knows who we all are and is able to perform all ADLS except no driving and ltd tolerance to activity d/t her foot not healing well.

I pray that things get better with your mom, and I pray your heartstrings don't get yanked too much during this trying and anguishing time for you.